


Bring Me Home

by CaptainPoupon



Series: Bring Me Home [1]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Enchanted Forest, Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Pre-Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Emma Swan, Romance, The Enchanted Forest, The Jolly Roger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-07-27 10:54:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 62,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7615279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainPoupon/pseuds/CaptainPoupon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the day of her twenty-eighth birthday, when a mysterious book appears to her in Boston and brings her to the Enchanted Forest, Emma Swan meets Killian Jones. A prophecy says he is the one who can help her; he seems to be her only hope. She asks him to bring her home, but it’s not that easy, and she finds herself on an adventure she would have never expected to live.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. An Unexpected Journey

Nearly collapsing against the wall as she finally entered her apartment, Emma took her shoes off. What an exhausting day it had been; again. But tonight was different. It was _supposed_ to be different: today was Emma’s twenty-eighth birthday. The accomplishment of another year: something to celebrate, even if she had no friend or family to be with, as this Ryan had reminded her during the previous hour; having his head slammed against the steering wheel was all he deserved. Sighing, Emma tried to forget about him and took out of the bag she was carrying a gourmet cupcake; cinnamon cupcake, her favorite kind, freshly bought at the bakery across the street. Carefully, she put a star-shaped candle on it and lit it. Resting her chin on her crossed arms, she looked at the flickering light.

“Another banner year,” she whispered.

Shutting her eyes, all she could wish for was not to be alone anymore. She did not believe in birthday wishes becoming true; this would be magic, and magic did not exist. But everyone she had ever met, all of them without any exception, had ended up letting her down. She was not losing anything by making the wish that this would change. Emma blew out the candle and kept her eyes closed for a few seconds. Everything remained silent in the room. Nothing had happened, of course, what had she been expected? That someone would just come and knock on her door? Shaking her head again, she stood up, removing the candle. At least, she had the cupcake.

Looking up, this was when she saw it: at the end of the table, on the top of the stack of mail, was a large book. Her eyebrows raised in surprise. She did not remember seeing it. Probably she had been tired and had not paid attention enough when retrieving the post in the morning; this was the only possible explanation, it could not have appeared out of nowhere. Her cupcake in hand, she skirted the table and reached for the book. It looked too good for an advertisement. Perhaps one of the neighbors had ordered it and the postman had inadvertently slipped it in the wrong mailbox. But there was no indication of the addressee. The only words written on the cover were ‘Once Upon A Time’. Eating her cupcake, Emma looked through the pages: a fairy tales book. The last time she had read such stories dated back to a very long time ago, when she was still in the foster system. Quickly, she had realized those stories were nothing like reality and she had not tried to read such stories again. But right now, the idea of escaping her reality by reading a fairy tale did not sound so bad. The idea was even appealing; it would allow her to forget about Ryan or all these people whose happiness was issuing from, in the meantime reminding her she had no one. Usually, loneliness was not affecting her so much. But, celebrating her birthday alone once again, tonight was one of these times when she could barely think of anything else than of how lonely she was.

After changing into more comfortable clothes, trading her skin-tight dress for black sweatpants and a red tank top, Emma settled herself in the armchair with the book. She started to read about an old man living in a secluded house, in the forest of a far-off land. There was a picture on the second page. The blonde trailed her fingers over it, examining the verdant forest and the stone cottage standing at the end of the path. Something in this cottage caught her attention. It appeared too small to allow her seeing it in details, but what looked like the door frame was gleaming. Examining it more closely, she trailed a fingertip over the golden glow. It then happened in a matter of seconds: the gleam intensified, to the extent that Emma was blinded. She could not see anything else than this bright golden light, and felt like she was falling down. Soon, the fall stopped as she landed on the ground with a thump. The bright light had faded away and Emma opened her eyes. The next second, she had got up, looking all around her at the verdant forest and at the cottage at the end of the path.

“What the hell is that?” She kept looking around and her eyes landed on the book, lying in the grass. “I’m dreaming, I am about to wake up.”

The day had been so exhausting that she had probably fallen asleep, and would wake up any second to find herself with her head resting on her crossed arms, facing her cinnamon cupcake. This fairy tales book had been made up by her imagination. Standing in the middle of the path, Emma closed her eyes and waited. When she opened them again, she was still in the forest.

“Wait a bit longer and you’ll wake up,” she whispered to herself.

But no matter how hard she tried, whenever she opened her eyes, the view remained the same. Feeling her heart beat faster, she looked from the book to the cottage, and to the book again. She picked it up and opened it. There was no doubt about it: the cottage on the picture looked exactly like the one standing at the end of the path. Losing hope that she would wake up, and panic striking, Emma ran down the path, the book under her arm, ignoring the tingling due to the twigs and the pebbles under her bare feet. Panting, she hammered on the door. She didn’t need to wait long before hearing it being unlocked.

A bearded man with long hair opened. He looked her up and down before asking. “Can I help you?”

Emma was just staring at him in silence, catching her breath. How was she supposed to explain what had happened, when she did not know herself? How could he believe her if she said she was reading a book in her apartment in Boston and suddenly found herself lying on the ground in the forest, in this scenery she had seen in the book? The forest was not the only similarity with the story: the man also perfectly fitted the description.

“Are you the Apprentice?”

The old man smiled. “This is an accurate way to describe me. You know who I am but I don’t know who you are. Rare are the ones venturing to this place, where are you coming from?”

His eyes seemed to linger with curiosity on her outfit; her black sweatpants and red top tank. But Emma did not notice: she was looking around, trying to stay calm. In her entire life, she had rarely felt so lost.

“I didn’t mean to come here, I am from Boston. Swan, Emma Swan,” she said fast, still a bit breathless. She kept looking around, trying to understand what had happened.

The man’s face seemed to light up and he opened the door wide. “Emma, what a lovely name!”

“Thanks.” Emma stared at the man, her eyebrows raised in surprise. The man had obviously no idea about what was happening: she was lost and all he could say was that her name was lovely?

“Would you come in? I just put a kettle on the fire, join me for tea.”

Emma glanced around once again. “I am not sure this is a good idea, I should…”

“…find out about where you are. You surely have many questions, Emma. I can help you. Why don’t you come in and talk to me about this book?”

Her eyes were full of surprise. Perhaps the old man knew more than she had expected. She had nowhere else to go, anyway. Hesitantly, she entered the cottage and glanced around the room. A fire was crackling in the hearth, a kettle was heating up. The bed and the table were taking most of the place in the room. A ladder seemed to lead to the attic. A stone archway was leading to another part of the cottage, where the floor was cluttered with straw. Emma was paying more attention to details than usual, looking for any sign of threat. But there was none and she focused on the man again, who indicated her one of the chairs.

“Who are you?”

The old man looked surprised.

“The Apprentice,” he replied on a tone implying it was explaining everything, while filling two cups with tea. “I can see you have many questions, Emma. And I happen to have many answers. I can tell you everything that you want to know. Or at least everything that you need to know: it is my duty to lead you on the way to your destiny.”

Was this supposed to help? What was he talking about? His duty? Her destiny? Emma was even more confused now, which the man seemed to notice. He looked amused, his smile reaching his eyes while he sipped his tea.

“Ask me anything that you want to know.”

Emma was staring again, and asked the first question which came through her mind. “Where am I?”

“The fact you arrived here with the book makes me think you’ve read it and you know exactly where we are. You know the book brought you here, in the Enchanted Forest.”

“But it makes no sense.” The words came out instantly.

“Now that’s interesting.” The Apprentice slightly leant over the table, obviously enjoying this conversation. “Tell me, Emma, why would it make no sense?”

“Because a book is just a book, it is not possible that…” She didn’t even know what to say and shook her head. “I must be dreaming. I will wake up anytime now, in my apartment in Boston.”

“Your imagination would be very creative may it be able to create such vivid dreams. All of this is real, Emma. And you are mistaken:  _this_  is more than just a book. Now, I don’t think you’ve told me why it makes no sense. The fact it happened should be enough to make you believe it is possible.”

This was the point: whatever had happened, she did not believe, because there was no rational explanation. Emma was wondering where he was going with all these enigmatic words.

“It makes no sense because no science can explain this.”

The man seemed satisfied with her answer, his eyes were twinkling. “Why should it be explained by science when it can be explained by magic?”

“Magic does not exist,” she replied bluntly.

For one moment, she had thought the man would be able to help her. Obviously she had been wrong.

“The fact you don’t believe something is true doesn’t make it unreal. And if I am right, even if you’re not aware of it, deep down you do believe: using the book to arrive here requires believing in magic. This is the only way you could have travelled so far.”

Emma stared. She was losing her time. She pushed the untouched cup of tea towards the man and got up. “I should go.”

The old man did not try to hold her back, but simply asked. “Do you have any idea where to go?”

The blonde sighed. He was right, she had no idea where to go, and did not even know how far the closest town was. She sat back down.

“Before you leave, there are things that you need to know.”

“Tell me, then.” Because of exhaustion and the fear she might not find her way back, her words were imprinted with annoyance now. Instead of telling her he had things to say, could he not just say them?

“I’m coming there. But for what I’m about to tell you, I need you to believe in magic. Or at least to pretend that you do. Can you do this?”

Emma shrugged, more and more wondering whether the man in front of her was sane. “I’ll try. Tell me, then. What is this all about?”

Her annoyance was clearly audible again. She just wished he could just stop being so mysterious and tell her everything. He seemed to read her mind, as he explained in more details.

“I wanted to tell you about prophecies, this is why you need to pretend you believe in magic. Prophecies are written by sorcerers, and it is very rare when they are not accomplished. Generally, prophecies define one moment in the life of the ones they’re about, usually a key-moment. Now you may wonder why I am telling you this. I am the Apprentice, and I know most of these prophecies. You probably noticed how I reacted to your name? There is one about you, Emma.” Again, she was staring at him, but she could not find anything to say, so she just listened. “This one is about a woman coming from another realm and trying to find her way home. Your name was written all over the parchment. When I saw you at my door, carrying the book and looking so lost because you were so far from home, you reminded me of this theory. Then you told me your name, and I knew it was you.” The man paused, giving her some time to take it in. “Emma, you are not here by accident. This book did not appear to you by chance.”

“Are you going to say I landed in this forest because of fate?” Emma was truly annoyed now, angry towards herself that she was still listening to him, wondering why she had not left yet.

“Exactly,” the man beamed, obviously thinking she was finally getting the point. But Emma stood up.

“This is crap.”

His smile faded but he stayed calm. “You don’t want to believe,” he assessed.

“Why is it so important to you that I do? I didn’t ask for any of this.”

“Because you have to believe to find your way home, and it is my duty to guide you.”

“Let’s assume I believe in these prophecies, which I don’t: how is that supposed to help me go back to Boston?”

A smile brightened the old man’s face again. “I have told you there was a prophecy about you. You didn’t give me time to tell you what it says. You know how my duty is to guide you. I am guiding you by telling you this: according to this prophecy, there is someone out there who can help you find what you’re looking for.”

“Someone can help me find my way back to Boston?” Now, that sounded interesting. “How do I find them?”

“I can tell you this: his name is Killian Jones.”


	2. Captain Jones

“Killian Jones? And where do I find him?” Emma still had no idea about where she was, except that the place was called the Enchanted Forest. She tilted her head, looking at the man. “You seem to know so much about it, why can’t you just indicate me the way back to Boston, instead of sending me to some stranger?”

The man smiled and scratched his chin. “I’m afraid this is more complicated than what you think. I do know many things, but I can’t indicate you the way to Boston. You see, the universe is made of many realms, mostly independent from each other. But sometimes, there are ways to cross the veil between the realms and you can travel through space and time. This book, besides telling stories which really happened, is one of these ways; it made you cross the veil, bringing you from your realm to this one. But the book follows its own rules and will very unlikely bring you back. Other than the book, I can also make you cross the veil, but it would be complicated to send you to the right realm. However, I have an idea about where you might find Killian Jones, and I can even send you there; in just a few seconds, you would travel from here to there.”

Emma opened wide eyes at the idea, imagining herself disappearing from the cottage and appearing in another unknown place; or simply not reappearing at all.

“No thanks, I will walk.” No matter how long it would take her, there was no way she would accept such an offer.

“You still have no trust in magic. After everything you’ve been through today, how can you still doubt magic? This would be barely different from the trip from your realm to here. If you want to walk, I will let you do so, of course. But out of curiosity, could you answer this question first? I had never seen such a powerful denial of magic, and I am wondering how you found the book: can you describe me how it happened? What were you doing when the book appeared to you?”

Emma was forgetting her theory about the postman’s inadvertence; she was trying to accept the idea that the book did appear to her. With a shrug, she replied to his question. “I came back to my apartment with the cupcake I had bought for my birthday.”

“Your twenty-eighth birthday.” The man smiled at Emma’s expression of surprise. “It was written in the prophecy. But I didn’t mean to interrupt you, please continue.”

Her words not much confident as she was watching the man carefully, she went on, listing what she had done. “I lit a candle, watched the flame, closed my eyes, made a wish, blew out the candle. When I opened my eyes again, it was there, in the corner of the table.”

Again, the man looked like he was satisfied with her answer. “You made a wish?”

“That’s a stupid thing I’ve been doing since my childhood.”

“And why would it be stupid? You see, Emma, you just solved the mystery. Making a wish is a sign that you wanted to believe. It was surely all it took for this book to appear to you.” The man was examining the book, looking through the pages, while Emma was staring at him, speechless. “Now you are free to go. You shouldn’t need this book on your way; if it doesn’t bother you, I’d like to keep it.”

Emma nodded; she was not willing to carry this heavy book anyway.

“When you leave this place, walk down the path. After less than an hour, you will reach a junction. Turn left, and after another hour, you will enter an oceanfront village. If I’m right, it should be easy for you to find him.” This last part was not worrying Emma: finding people was part of her daily life. She stood up, having in mind to go and find Killian Jones, the one who would help her find her way home. “Emma, before you go, is there anything else I can do to help you? It is not much, but I can provide you with a flask of water and some biscuits.”

“Maybe I should take the flask of water.”

The man went to another room and came back with a flask. “I would offer you to stay and get some rest before you leave, but from what I know, the man you’re looking for may leave the village in the next few hours. You should go now.”

Emma shrugged. Though she was exhausted, she would not want to get some sleep here anyway. “Thank you. I will go now.”

She was reaching for the door knob when the man stopped her.

“Wait, you can’t go like this.”

Her eyebrows were raised as she watched him climbing up the ladder and disappearing in the attic. He came back down carrying a pair of hide ankle boots. There had been so many things to think about that Emma had not realized she was about to go out bare feet.

“This is all that I have, I hope they will fit,” said the man.

The boots were a bit large but it was fine. “Thanks.”

“Good luck to find what you’re looking for, Emma Swan.”

With the strap of the flask over her shoulder, Emma started to walk through the forest. Birds’ songs were the only sounds breaking the silence. Now that she was alone, she could think of what had happened. The idea that some magical book had made her travel through space and time was still unbelievable. The more she was walking away from the cottage, the more it seemed unreal. Everything the Apprentice had told her was making less and less sense as she walked away. Magic did not exist. She must have been dreaming. When would she wake up? But wherever she was now, whether she would wake up soon or not, there was only one thing she kept in mind: she had to find Killian Jones. Whoever this man was, he was her only hope. There was nothing else she could do, nowhere else she could go, so she kept walking, turning left when the path split up. Lost in her thoughts, debating to sort out what was true from what was not, Emma didn’t have time to worry. The sun was high in the sky, the forest was not too thick; the path was flooded with sunlight. Nothing distracted her and stopped the thoughts from running over and over again in her mind. She was so absorbed that she lost the track of time and, sooner than she had expected, walked past the first habitations.

It looked like she was on the main street. The village seemed very small; ahead of the aligned houses, she could see the path disappearing in the forest again. A simple glance at the habitations made her heart beat faster; the contrast with Boston was blatant and only now she realized how far from home she must be, in space but also possibly time. The dirt road, the absence of utility poles or cars, the clothes of the children playing in the street, or the horses grazing in the stable she had just walked past: everything was reminding her of places she had seen in history books, or in movies depicting stories happening decades earlier. Emma decided to walk to what she guessed was the center of the village, to this portion of the street where inhabitants were more numerous. The center of the village was actually a square on the right side of the street, around which several buildings such as a bakery and an apothecary were lined up. But Emma did not focus too much on the buildings, or on the inhabitants looking around to examine her outfit when she passed them: momentarily forgetting she was lost, Emma walked across the square, heading towards the harbor which seemed as large as the village itself. Memories from her childhood, one of the only happy ones she had, came back to her: memories of this day when one of her foster families had taken her to the ocean. She had loved this place. Even in Boston, whenever she had the occasion, she would go and have a walk by the waterside.

“Captain Jones said we would set sail at the start of the dog watch.”

Drawn from her thoughts, Emma watched the two men who had just walked past her. The only words she had caught were ‘Captain Jones’; could this captain be the man she was looking for? It made sense; a captain of a ship was used to travelling, and could probably help her find her way back home. Emma ran after the two men and caught up with them.

“Excuse me, did you mention ‘Captain Jones’?”

The men turned around to face her and both looked her up and down before exchanging a glance. “Aye, we did.”

“Where can I find him?”

One of the men pointed at the end of the harbor, from where they were coming, behind her. “Can you see this large ship over there, the most majestic of them all? You will find the Captain there, getting ready to set sail.”

“Thanks!” she flung at the men before running towards the ship.

The closer she was, the slower she ran. The blonde was walking when she reached the ship. Sailors were going back and forth between the docks and the deck. A man wearing white pants, a white shirt and a black jacket with what looked like golden buttons, and a black hat, was standing on deck, supervising the sailors; if Captain Jones was there, it should be him. Standing on the docks, staring at him, she suddenly caught his eye as he noticed her. Wondering whether she was doing the right thing, she walked along the ship and got on board, feeling his gaze on her all the way.

“Welcome aboard.”

Emma stopped, leaving some distance between them, and looked up into the bright blue eyes. “Captain Jones?”  

“Aye, that’d be me. How can I help you?”

A sigh of relief left her; she had found him. She then stared into his eyes, trying to find a way to explain the reason of her presence. “This is a long story, but the point is that I got lost, and I’ve been told the only one who could help me was Killian Jones.”

“Then, I’m afraid you’re addressing the wrong person. I am not Killian.”

Hopeful when she had talked, Emma had been willing to hear anything but this. It was like a dead weight fell into her stomach. Her heart thumped in her chest and she felt like she could not breathe, at least until she heard his next words.

“If what you’ve been told is true, the one who can help you is my brother, Lieutenant Jones.”

Emma’s features lit up as she found hope again. “Do you know how I can find him?”

The captain nodded. “Killian is in the captain’s quarters, studying some maps before we set sail. I can lead you to him.”

But something seemed to bother him, which Emma noticed. “Anything wrong?”

“No, don’t worry, I can handle this. It is just that sailors generally don’t appreciate the presence of a woman on board. I am the one making the decisions on this ship, of course, but I would prefer to avoid discord now that we’re almost ready to set sail. It would be better if you could go inside without being seen. Here’s what we’re going to do: only when I tell you, go downstairs and turn on your right. I’ll be right behind you.” Emma nodded, while the man looked around. When no sailor seemed to be looking in their direction, Captain Jones gave her the signal. “Go!”

Emma rushed inside and turned right, before suddenly being stopped as she crashed into someone. She looked up and drowned into bright blue eyes. She was unable to do anything but to stand there. The man had come out of the first room on the right, and had not had time to see her arrive. He looked as much startled as her, if not more. The intensity of his stare made her hold his gaze.

Neither of them noticed the captain had joined them. “Killian, this is… someone who was looking for you. Miss, my brother.”

Killian kept staring at her. “Um, uh yeah. Um.”

He slightly shook his head, obviously trying to get a grip on himself. This was when Emma realized how close they were, him holding her shoulders while her hands were on his hips. Embarrassed, she stepped back while he held out his hand.

“Pleasure.” Killian still looked dumbstruck when she awkwardly shook his hand.

“Killian,” his brother called with a hint of amusement behind the serious tone. “The lady came aboard and told me she needed your help.”

“My help?” Perhaps it was due to some sense of duty; the lieutenant shook his head again and suddenly seemed more responsible, though Emma could still feel the intensity of his glance. “Brother, can you hold the Jewel of the Realm at anchor a bit longer?”

“Of course. Lead her to the captain’s quarters. If you need me, I’ll be on deck.”

Without a word, Emma followed the lieutenant to the end of the corridor. “Ladies first,” he said when opening the door. She entered the room and glanced around, exactly as she had done when entering the apprentice’s cottage. Except from the swords hung to the wall, there was no sign of threat. The bed on the left side of the room reminded her of how exhausted she was. Maps and an instrument she recognized as a sextant were covering the desk. A ladder allowed a direct access to the deck. Killian pulled out a chair and indicated her to sit down. She watched him roll up the maps and put them away. His outfit was similar to his brother’s, with the only difference that his collar was golden and there was no epaulette. When he stood from profile, she noticed the bow tying his hair in his neck. Finally, he sat down opposite her.

“Liam, my brother, said that you needed my help. What can I do for you?”

Feeling the intensity of his stare again, Emma wondered where she should start her story. “Do you believe in magic?”

Killian raised an eyebrow. Obviously he had not been expecting this. “I’ve seen magic, why?”

“I am still not sure I believe, but it will be easier for you to understand if you do.” The intensity of his stare and the kindness in his eyes were making it difficult for her to hold his gaze.

“Tell me your story. How did you get to me?”

“It’s complicated, it might take a while.”

“My schedule’s pretty clear; we don’t need to set sail as early as it was planned.”

Emma explained how the book appeared to her, and how she fell through the pages and landed in the forest depicted in the chapter she was reading. Hearing her own words, she was feeling like her story was delirious and wondered what the man in front of her was thinking. She tried to judge his reaction, but he seemed to be listening to her carefully. Emma went on, describing her encounter with the Apprentice.

“He told me the book made me travel between realms, but that there was no chance it would take me back to Boston. He also talked about prophecies, and mentioned one of them, one about me. According to this prophecy, there is someone who can help me; it’s you.”

At her last words, Killian raised his eyebrows in surprise.

“There is a prophecy about you and I?” asked the man. Emma nodded.

“If I got this right, you are coming from another realm, you want to go back there, and according to a prophecy, I am the one who can help you?” said the lieutenant, making sure he had understood. Emma nodded again. Thinking, Killian brushed his jawline with his thumb. “Why would it be me and not my brother?  _He_  is the captain.”

“Can either of you help me? Can you bring me home?” Emma realized how confident she had been since she had met him. But now that she was seeing him so uncertain, she had doubts. “How can I cross the veil between the realms?”

“I’m afraid you don’t know me very well. I’m a lieutenant, not a sorcerer. I don’t know how to travel between the realms.”

Like when Captain Jones had told her that she was addressing the wrong person, Emma felt this dead weight falling into her stomach. Her heart thumped in her chest, and breathing was difficult. She tried not to show the fear taking possession of her; she had left the Apprentice’s cottage with the idea Killian Jones would help her. But if he could not, who would be able to help her find her way back to Boston?

“The Apprentice seemed to know loads about magic,” said Emma. “Maybe I should just go back to him, tell him the prophecy was wrong.”

She stood up, and was about to open the door but Killian was faster. He stood in front of her, blocking her the way.

“I can walk you back there.”

Emma looked up in his eyes. He looked as if he was willing to help, while having no idea how to. “No, thanks, I will find my way on my own.”

“As you wish.” He stepped aside to let her pass and watched her leave, not finding anything to hold her back.

Without a glance back at the ship, Emma walked away. Thinking of the way back to the Apprentice’s cottage, she realized she did not have the strength to walk. She only wanted to sleep, to forget about all of this for a moment. But there didn’t seem to be any hotel around. After offering her to welcome her at her place, the woman she had asked indicated a tavern where there were also a few rooms.

The place was quite dark and not much populated. Emma walked to the counter. “Excuse me? I’d like a room.”

“Really?” The man asked in surprise, looking her up and down. “What’s the name?”

“Swan, Emma Swan.”

The bartender nodded and handed her a key. “The room will be upstairs, on the right at the end of the corridor. If you need anything to eat or drink, you have everything that you need here.”

Emma tried to think. Was she hungry? So many things had happened, so many thoughts were jostling in her mind, that she couldn’t decide whether she was hungry or not. She simply nodded and headed towards the stairs. But she didn’t have time to reach them, and jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder, instantly turning around.

“My apologies,” said Lieutenant Jones, quickly taking his hand back. “I didn’t want to scare you. It’s just I had no way to call to you, you haven’t told me your name.”

“Emma Swan.” She was too much exhausted to say anything else, or even to wonder whether knowing her name was his reason for being here.

“Emma, I may have found a way, perhaps I can help bringing you home. It is a bit long to explain.” Killian glanced around, before his bright blue eyes locked on hers. “Will you let me offer you dinner?”


	3. On the Edge of the Forest

"Dinner?” Emma gazed at him, confused. “How is that going to help?”

Killian smiled. Again, his stare was so intense that it was difficult to hold.

“Dinner has nothing to do with helping you find your way home,” said the lieutenant. “But you travelled so far, I simply assumed that, perhaps, you were hungry.”

He raised an inquiring eyebrow. He convinced her and they ordered the dish of the day before sitting at a table by the window. The room was so dark that even with the candles they were still in semi-darkness.

“You were saying you found a way?” asked Emma.

“Not exactly: I said I  _may_  have found a way. When you left, I went to Liam. He asked me about you, and I told him about the prophecy. We talked about ways to travel from one realm to another, and he reminded me of something which might help: have you ever heard of magic beans?”

“Magic beans, like in ‘Jack and the beanstalk’?” Emma’s voice had the same tone of disbelief than with the Apprentice.

“Oh, so you’ve heard of Jack?”

“Are you saying Jack is real?”

“Of course she’s real.”

“She? It’s just… in my world, ‘Jack and the beanstalk’ is a tale for children, it is supposed to be a legend.”

Leaning over the table, Killian looked fascinated by what she was saying. “Your realm seems much different than this one. Here, most of the legends happen to rely on real stories.”

“Magic exists and legends are real, all right, I can say this is a day full a surprises.” Exhausted, a sigh escaped her; she would be glad when she would be in her bed. “Magic beans, you wanted to say something about them?”

“Aye. The legend says magic beans can open portals between the realms.”

“And you believe they can?” Emma had heard so much during the day, she seemed to consider the possibility some bean may show her the way home.

“I do. Thanks,” he said to the bartender who brought them two meat pies. He took one bite before going on. “I also happen to know where we could find one, even if this remains hypothetic.”

As a new plan was taking shape, Emma pretended she believed and forgot about sleeping, ready to go back outside if it was to find a magic bean which would take her back to Boston.

“Where do I need to go?”

Killian’s lips stretched into a lopsided smile and he raised an eyebrow. “ _We_  need to cross the forest. Once there, we may have some climbing. At the top, there should be some magic beans.”

“We?” Emma was too busy staring at him to think of eating anything.

The lieutenant scratched his eyebrow. “Do you really think I would let you venture on your own?”

The blonde was taken aback by this question. Holding his gaze, she answered in a voice which was more like a whisper. “Yes.”

This was what almost everyone in her life had ever done, and the few ones who had not left her alone had ended up letting her down later, after giving her hope that she had found someone who cared; a false hope, worse than anything.

Killian shook his head. “You won’t go there alone. It is too late now to go today, we will go tomorrow. This way, you can get some rest before we go there.”

Tomorrow. Emma quirked an eyebrow, confused. “Aren’t you supposed to be on your ship, tomorrow? You were supposed to be sailing already.”

Killian flashed her a smile. “Indeed. We were supposed to leave in the afternoon. That is until you found us. Liam and I decided to postpone our departure.”

“You’re going to a fair amount of trouble just to help me. Why?”

The man slightly leant over the table. “I am not willing to let you go so easily, especially if a prophecy says I am destined to help you.”

"I..." But Emma did not know what to say. She stared at the lieutenant, trying to guess what his motivations could be.

"Aye? Something to say?" He waited, staring back with a smile.

"Nothing." She used her plate which was still untouched as a pretext to look down and ate in silence, her thoughts much too busy to care about the taste of her pie. From time to time, she glanced up, and looked down immediately as he didn't seem to take his eyes off of her.

When they went to the counter, Killian was about to pay. "There is no reason why you should pay for me. I'm paying my part."

"I remember I asked you the permission to offer you dinner. But as you wish." He was smiling as if he had got what he wanted and stepped aside to let her face the barman.

"How much is it?" she asked.

"Fifteen doubloons."

"Doubloons?" Emma asked, startled, and Killian's smile widened. But she had a problem other than the money which was used in this realm: her hand stopped on the spot of the pocket where she normally put her credit card; she had no pocket in these sweatpants.

"May I?" The lieutenant asked, showing her a small leather pouch.

With a sigh, Emma nodded and Killian gave the barman some coins. For the first time since she had arrived in this new realm, she realized she had nothing and wondered how she would do without even a credit card; another reason to go back to Boston as soon as possible.

"Now," Killian said, his hand on her shoulder while leading her towards the stairs, where he had found her before offering her dinner. "You look exhausted. Get a good night of sleep and tomorrow morning I'll come back. We'll try to find this magic bean and take you home."

It didn't take Emma long to fall asleep. When she woke up in the morning, she remembered a dream she had, a very strange dream about a book, an Apprentice, a prophecy, and a man who had talked about a magic bean. But then she opened her eyes: this was not Boston. "Oh no..."

She got up and walked to the window. Inhabitants wearing these unusual outfits were already out in the street, walking down the dirt road. Emma tried to think of what Killian Jones had told her. He wanted to help her find a magic bean, he had said he would come back in the morning. But was he trustworthy? Would he really come back? She checked her reflection in the mirror and decided a shower would be nothing but good. Not having anything was truly annoying; she would have to explain this to the barman, trying to make him understand she could not pay. But when she went down and started to tell him she did not have any money, the man smiled.

"Your room has already been paid. The man who offered you dinner also paid your night."

"He paid my night?" Emma repeated, startled.

She shook her head and went back to her room, wondering if Killian would come back, and wondering what she would do if he did not. Going back to the Apprentice, probably, but the other option seemed better; she surprised herself hoping he would come back. But it didn’t seem plausible: why would he come back? He had his brother, his ship which was supposed to leave soon. Had she even understood him well, had he truly said he would come back? Lost in her thoughts, Emma was looking through the window without really seeing what was outside. She jumped when there was a knock on the door, and she went to open.

"Emma!" He said as a greeting, a bright smile on his lips.

"You came back."

"Does that surprise you?" Emma looked down and, slowly, he placed his fingers under her chin and made her look up at him, an understanding look in his eyes. "You can trust me."

"How can I be sure I can?" She asked, looking into his eyes and trying to stay calm despite his fingers under her chin.

Killian let go of her but didn’t take his eyes away. His voice was still very soft. " _That_ is a choice you will have to make." He paused, glancing around the room. "Are you ready to go?" Emma nodded and followed him out of the tavern. "We need to cross the forest. We can walk but it would probably be almost night when we come back. There is another way: have you ever ridden a horse?"

Emma shook her head. "In my world, we don't travel by horse. I've never had the chance to ride one. The only horses I've ever seen were on TV."

"On what?"

"On TV. In movies or shows." Seeing his incredulous look, Emma smiled; her first genuine smile since she had arrived in this realm. She ignored why, but she found adorable his lack of knowledge of her world. "Forget about this. Point is that I've never been on a horse."

Her smile was reflected on Killian's features. "All right. Then, the choice is up to you. We can walk, or ride."

"Let's try the horse. The faster I'm back in Boston, the better."

Killian led her to the stable she had walked past the day before. A man was waiting there and, after embarrassing Emma by looking her up and down, glanced at the lieutenant.

"We'll take the horses," said Killian

Soon, a bay horse and a white one were ready.

"Come here," Killian called Emma, standing next to the white horse he had just finished preparing. "It is quite simple. You sit there, you put your feet here. You hold this, or the reins." He explained, showing her each part of the saddle.

He held out his hand and, hesitantly, she softly placed hers in his, letting him pull her closer to the horse. "Place your hands here, and put your foot in the stirrup, here. Once your foot is in the stirrup, you can use it to sit on the saddle. Is it clear?"

Emma nodded, glad he had taken the time to explain her all of this, since she had never got the occasion to come so close to a horse. The saddle looked high but, with Killian standing next to her to assure her security, she managed to climb there more easily than she had expected.

"Are you alright?" he asked. Emma nodded again, looking at her horse, her fingers brushing the white mane.

Soon, she was imitating Killian and following his indications, her horse walking alongside with Killian's, out of the village and into the forest. It was easier than she had thought, and also more enjoyable than she had imagined.

"How do I stop him if I feel like he's going too fast?"

"Just simply pull on the reins. Speaking of going fast, you seem at ease on your horse, do you feel like going faster?"

The path ahead of them was quite large and going straight through the trees. Emma flashed Killian a smile. With her heels, she kicked the flanks of her horse and the animal sped up. It felt even better like this. For one moment, she forgot that she was lost in a land so far from Boston, and focused only on the hooves hitting the ground, the mane under her fingers, her hair floating in the wind, and Killian keeping up with her. She sped up again and, with Killian still by her side, let her horse gallop through the forest, until the path narrowed; pulling on the reins, she slowed down.

"And you're saying you've never ridden a horse?" Killian asked, slowing down as well.

Emma shook her head. "Never."

"Then, it looks like you're a natural."

These words brought Emma a smile, and instantly Killian smiled warmly. His words also got her lost in her thoughts; a natural? Could her parents she never had the chance to know be skilled riders? Unwilling to think of her own story, Emma changed the subject.

"How do _you_ know how to ride? Aren't sailors only supposed to sail?"

Killian chuckled lightly. "Besides the fact that, in this realm, everyone knows how to sail, there are times when we're on land. Horses can then be quite convenient."

Now that the subject was launched, Emma's curiosity was tickled. "What do you do exactly as a sailor? Are you leaving on expeditions, looking for something, as we can read in books?"

"You read books about sailing?" Killian asked, lightly tilting his head, looking pleased.

"Not really about sailing, and it was a long time ago. Books of adventure can be a nice escape." She didn't want to say more about this and he seemed to notice, as he came back to her question.

"There can be many reasons to go sailing. Most of the time, sailors leave with an objective, even though some of them randomly sail the seas. Liam and I, with our crew, are on official business for the Queen. She often needs all sorts of rare objects, and she sends Liam and I to find them."

"For the Queen? That must be important. Are you sure leaving one day later because of me won't be a problem?"

"Liam and I are the ones deciding when to leave. You don't have to worry, everything is all right."

The fact he looked away, pretending to focus on the path ahead of them, made Emma doubt about it but she didn't reply anything. Soon, the forest became less thick, there was more and more sunlight passing through the trees. Finally, they reached the edge of the forest and paused there. The path was going down the hill. Below, the countryside was stretching to the horizon. Emma was staring at something, something which didn't look like a tree and which was disappearing up in the clouds. This couldn't be...

"A beanstalk," said Killian as if he was reading her thoughts. "If there is a magic bean somewhere, it will be up there."

"Are you kidding?" She searched on his features any hint, but found none. "We need to climb that thing?"

"Aye."

They needed some time to cross the countryside. When they reached the foot of the beanstalk, they stopped the horses and Killian held her hand to help her get down. While he tied both horses to the bushes nearby, Emma looked up at the beanstalk.

"Killian, I don't think I can do it."

"Without this, you couldn't," he said, coming back to her and taking her hand to put some sort of black bracelet around her wrist. She noticed he was wearing the same one.

“What is that for?”

"Giants have enchanted the beanstalk so that no human can climb it. This," he said indicating the bracelet,  "thwarts the effects of this enchantment." Killian took another step towards her and looked her in the eyes, his voice soft when he talked again. "Emma, you can do it. If I can climb the beanstalk, there is no reason why you couldn't. You told me you liked reading books of adventure, now it's time to live your own."


	4. Open Book

There was something in the way he was looking at her which made her hold his stare. Maybe it was because his gaze was so intense; looking into these bright blue eyes was somehow soothing. She nodded and walked to the beanstalk, and waited for him to start climbing before following him. It was easy to grip the beanstalk, and Emma surprised herself as she was able to follow the lieutenant. She caught up with him; they were now climbing side by side.

Climbing was easier than she had expected, but it was also very long; looking up, she saw the clouds high above. She then looked down to check how much they had progressed. They had been climbing for a while now, but they were still much closer to the ground than to the clouds, though they were high enough to give her chills; she clutched the beanstalk tightly and closed her eyes.

"Are you alright?" When she opened her eyes, she saw Killian right beside her, with a hint of worry in his eyes. She smiled softly.

"I'm fine. I just stupidly looked down." Since he kept staring at her, making sure she was fine, she gave him another smile. "I assure you I'm alright." And she started climbing again, Killian following her.

"Emma? I know I've been with you only for a few hours, but from what I've seen, you don't seem to dislike adventure. Am I wrong?"

Emma stopped climbing to look at him. His eyes were full of curiosity. She didn't know what to answer. The only reason why she was there was that she wanted to find a way back to Boston. She was lost and a magic bean seemed to be her best chance to go back home. But he was right. Since the morning, when he had knocked on her door, she hadn't felt so lost. She had even enjoyed the horse ride, and climbing the beanstalk was not as terrible as she had expected.

"Once again, tell me if I'm wrong, but I feel like you're alone in your realm."

"How would you know that?" Her question had come instantly, mostly because he had hit a nerve by being right on that point.

"I know this look. You're something of an open book, and this is what I can read in your eyes. Tell me, Emma: if there's nothing waiting for you there, why would you want to go back?"

Emma frowned, unwilling to answer this. "Just keep climbing."

Killian didn't insist and it was in silence that they kept climbing. Emma had lost track of time, though the sun was giving her a mere idea about what time it was; probably the early afternoon. Finally, they found themselves in a damp fog. To Emma's relief, the layer of clouds was thin and the top of the beanstalk was just there. She sat down on the low wall surrounding the top and looked around. A stone fortress was standing in front of them.

"Do you reckon the magic beans are in there?"

"If there are some, aye. You're ready?"

Standing in front of her, he held out his hand, which she ignored as she got up by herself and headed towards the entrance surrounded by two gigantic statues. A hand on her shoulder made her jump and turn around instantly to face the lieutenant.

"Killian, you really should stop doing that."

"My apologies. I just wanted to warn you before you go in: giants are not the friendly type of creatures. The best would be to avoid an encounter with one of them. You may want to be quiet and not to touch anything."

"Great," she replied in a hushed voice, again wondering where she was and whether she would wake up soon. "Let's find a bean and let's get the hell out of here."

The fortress was probably the largest place Emma had ever been in; probably because it belonged to giants. The ceiling was really high and the end of the room was barely visible. All over the place, treasures were piled up.

"How are we supposed to find a bean in all that mess?"

"Just by keeping your eyes open and looking. All I know is that, despite the appearances and all this gold, magic beans are the giants' most valuable possessions. If I had so many treasures, I know I would keep the most precious ones as far as possible from the entrance, in the least accessible place. I suggest to keep walking for now."

To Emma, the hypothesis was plausible. She followed Killian across the room, zigzagging between the piles of golden treasures, careful not to touch anything. The beanstalk was enchanted; Emma imagined the treasures could be as well, and she didn't want to drown in treasures flooding the room by replicating themselves at the slightest touch.

Focused on the piles of gold on both sides of the path, she wasn't careful enough about where she put her feet; she walked on the wrong paving stone and, with a crash, a pile of rubble separated her from Killian.

"Emma!"

Though startled by this sudden event, she was alright; feeling the paving stone sink under her foot, she had instantly jumped back and ducked right in time to avoid the considerable amount of rocks falling down at the precise spot where she had been. Hearing a distant noise, she stayed on the ground a few more seconds, wondering if that sound could be a growl. She preferred to pretend it was an echo of the stones falling down, and stood up. Killian appeared in front of her and looked relieved to see her on her feet.

"Came to check if you needed some saving. You're alright?"

Emma nodded and flashed her a smile. "No need for a saving. The only one who saves me is me." That was how it had always been.

"We're lucky no giant came here with all this racket. They could come anytime, we better hurry."

Without waiting, she followed him, looking ahead of them, wondering whether the wall at the end of the room was not moving back while they were coming closer; it still seemed as far as before.

"Careful!"

Emma was pulled sideways by the arm and she looked at the floor; Killian had made her avoid what looked like another tricked paving stone. She followed him more closely. Killian was starting to pay more attention to the treasures around them, looking for a magic bean. Emma's eye was caught by something else.

"Killian!"

Grabbing his arm, she quickly pulled him back, so quickly that the next second he was against her, his arms instantly wrapping around her. She could see the look of surprise in his eyes, and could also feel, again, the intensity of his stare. She momentarily forgot about why she had stopped him, or even about where they were, until he pulled her from her thoughts.

"In what honour do I get to hold you in my arms?"

With a tilt of the head, Emma indicated the string right behind him, a few inches above the floor.

"A trip wire. Quite a security system," she said.

Killian followed her eyes up to the ceiling. A cage was linked to the trip wire.

"That's a plausible excuse for grabbing me." Again, his eyes were locked on hers. He didn't seem eager to let her go. "I have noticed how you seem to prefer doing things on your own, and I don't mean to upset you, Emma, but I think we make quite the team, helping each other to avoid traps like this."

Emma simply couldn't take her eyes off of him. Only after a moment, he looked down at their bodies pressed against each other. She also looked down, and blushed when seeing the view her red tank top was offering him. She was about to step back and break the embrace when they were interrupted; a loud growl resounded and the floor quaked, accompanying each footstep: a giant was coming, it was too late to escape. Emma felt Killian's arms securely tighten around her while her arms went around his waist. He pulled her sideways and stopped near the end of the trip wire, hiding behind a high pile of golden treasures.

Emma furtively craned her neck from behind the treasures to cast a glance and opened wide eyes when she saw him arriving; the ceiling didn't look so high now that the giant was running across the room, coming closer. He would find them, and probably kill them; not the friendly type, Killian had said, and indeed, a simple glance at him left no doubt on the question. Emma ran her hand down Killian's side and found what she was looking for: the hilt of his sword. She waited a few more seconds, slightly squirming in his arms so that he would loosen his embrace, and unsheathed the sword to hit the trip wire as hard as she could. She pushed him away, stepping back just in time to avoid the cage, before looking startled at the giant lying down, trapped. The sword still clutched in her hand, she was wondering how she had done this or how she had even thought of doing it.

"That was brilliant. You're amazing." She heard Killian say behind her.

Without thinking, she dropped the sword and went to stand in front of the giant. His head was so huge that, even though his cheek was against the floor, she was still shorter than him.

"I need a magic bean, where are they?" she asked. The giant stared at her in silence. "Where are the magic beans?" Emma asked again, insisting on each word, not sure he was actually speaking English.

The giant was not looking at Emma anymore, but at Killian, protectively standing right behind her, his hand on the hilt of the sword he had picked up.

"You humans are all the same,” he finally said. “Taking what you want and killing everyone on your way."

"Tell me where the beans are," Emma said again.

"No. If you're going to kill me, do it now, before I escape from this cage."

"Look, I'm not from this realm, I need a bean to go back home."

"Not my problem, you won't get one. You humans don't deserve to live."

"Watch your words, giant." Killian stepped forward to stand next to Emma, sword in hand.

"You humans have destroyed everything. There is no magic bean left. The last beans are dried and unable to open portals."

"He's lying," said Killian.

"I don't think he is." Emma squatted in front of the cage, her eyes at the level of one of the giant's.

"Emma, giants are not trustworthy."

"He's telling the truth." Emma looked up at Killian. "I know when someone is lying to me. If you don't trust him, trust me."

Killian didn't hesitate long. "Let's go away." Grabbing her hand, he pulled her away and they ran towards the way out. "It's only a matter of time before he escapes from that cage."

Accepting the idea that the beanstalk was the only way, Emma followed him down. Though not as exhausting as the way up, going down still required her full attention; they didn't talk, trying to go down as fast as they could. They had climbed down more than a half of the beanstalk when it started to quiver, making it even more difficult: the giant was following them down the beanstalk. They hurried up, but the giant was faster; he seemed to be closer and closer. About two meters above the ground, Killian jumped down and waited for Emma, who was looking down, wondering whether she could jump from there. She happened not to have a choice as another tremor made her fell down and Killian, catching her, fell flat on his back, Emma on top of him.

"Third time since yesterday. I'm going to think you do it on purpose." He flashed her a teasing smile before becoming serious again as he looked over her shoulder. "We better go now. The horses, quick."

"Killian, hurry up!"

Emma was now on her saddle, as the lieutenant had told her, but he was still untying the horses while the giant was coming dangerously close to the ground. The ties were too tight. He freed Emma's horse first.

"Go without me, I'll catch you up," he said, now working on untying his own horse.

"No way! Untie your horse and let's go, together!"

A growl rang out. The giant had reached the ground.

"Killian!"

Seeing the giant coming towards them, the lieutenant changed his methods and broke the tie with his sword. Only a few meters left. Killian hit the croup of Emma's horse, making the animal suddenly gallop towards the forest. He quickly mounted his horse and followed, leaving before the giant had time to lean down and grab them. He growled again. The quakes of the floor let them know he was running after them, destroying the trees on his passage.

"We're faster. Just keep galloping, he'll give up soon."

After a few minutes, as Killian had said, the giant gave up. This wasn't enough for Emma to stop galloping; she didn't slow down, and Killian followed her. Soon, they reached the village and stopped at the stable. Emma sat down on the ground and Killian, after exchanging a few words with the man who took the horses back, joined her.

"Are you alright?"

"I will be. I just need some time." Sitting with her arms around her legs, she kept her head in her knees.

"At the foot of the beanstalk, when I said it was time for you to live your own adventure, I never thought it would be such an adventure. But you're a tough lass, you've been amazingly brilliant."

Sitting next to her, he waited for her to feel better. After a few minutes, she lifted her head up.

"You need to eat or drink something,” he said. “Am I allowed to take you back to this tavern where we were yesterday night?"

Emma nodded. Seeing she needed some time, Killian didn't make her talk. It was only after two large glasses of water and half her dish eaten that she looked up.

"With this giant running after us, I didn't have time to show you this." She brought out of her shoe a small object that she placed in the palm of her hand and showed him. "Do you think this could be one of these dried magic beans he was talking about?"

"It definitely is," said Killian, examining the bean between two fingers. "How did you get this?"

"When the giant fell down, trapped under this cage, one of his rings opened with the shock. He didn't notice several of these were scattered on the floor. This one was close to me, right behind the railings. When he talked about the dried beans, I supposed it could be it. It made sense; you told me you would keep your most valuable treasures in the safest place, and that the beans were the giants' greatest treasures: what is safer than on him? I bent down, looking him in the eye, and took the bean. Even if it's dried, the giant seemed to be keeping them preciously; maybe they're still valuable?"

Killian looked amazed as he listened to her. "Point taken. And very smart move. I saw nothing."

"Practice," she said. Killian raised his eyebrows, curious. "Some bad habits from my past, I've learned how to thieve without being seen. The bean is not the only thing I've taken up there."

Reaching for her shoes again, she brought out some golden coins which she placed on the table. She also took some out of the sides of her bra. Stealing had never bothered her before, but now that she was facing Killian, who seemed to have such good manners, she was looking at the handful of golden coins feeling ashamed.

"All this gold everywhere, I couldn't resist, I have nothing here,” she said as if she was trying to find an excuse. “They won't notice a few missing coins, right?"

"You stole that from the giants? Bad form, Swan." Though his tone was teasing because he was more amused than anything, Emma felt even more ashamed and looked down at the coins, gathering them up. She stopped when his hand reached for hers. The contact didn't last long as he quickly took his hand back, but it was enough to make her look up at him. "Emma, that's alright, you don't have to feel ashamed. Don't think I would judge you for this." Emma stared at him; what he had described corresponded exactly to how she was feeling. How could he know so much about her? It was like he was reading her thoughts as he added, "I told you, to me you're like an open book."

Emma opened her mouth to answer, but no word came out. Since she didn't reply, Killian changed the subject.

"This dried bean, I'm not sure we can do anything with it."

"Maybe some sort of magic can make it work again?"

"Not that I know of." A smile stretched his lips. "Look at who became a believer."

"After everything I've seen these last two days, I don't think I have a choice anymore."

"Again, point taken." Killian paused a few seconds, gazing at her. "Emma, I know that you wanted to go back to this Apprentice, but please consider this other option: you could come aboard and stay with me and the crew, until you find a way back to your realm."

"Your brother told me women were not welcome on board," she replied almost instantly, trying to hide how disconcerted by this second option she was.

"If Liam and I decide to invite you, our men won't have anything to say. You could stay in my cabin."

Emma opened wide eyes at these last words. She had wondered what his motivations to help her could be. Was this what it was all about? Was the lieutenant just willing to find a woman to share his cabin? Killian noticed her expression.

"My apologies, I didn't mean it to sound like this. If you come, you will have my cabin and I'll find a place in Liam's quarters, or with the crew. Emma, I will make sure you're safe. Life on sea is generally more peaceful than anything you've been through these past two days: no beanstalk, no giant. Consider this option: stay with us, at least for one week. If we don't find any way for you to go back to your realm, we can take you back to the Apprentice."

"How is being in the middle of the sea supposed to help me find a way back home?"

"There are in the captain's quarters many books. Perhaps one of them will tell us what to do. Emma, you don't have to decide now. Book a room here for tonight, and take advantage of the night to think about it. The Jewel of the Realm leaves tomorrow morning. If you decide to join us, you're welcome aboard. If not, well, I hope you will find what you're looking for."


	5. Inner Struggle

Emma didn't sleep much on that night. She spent hours tossing and turning, or even lying on her back and staring at the ceiling, thinking. She was thinking of everything that had happened during the day, and wondering where she would go in the morning; she had a choice, and during the night she kept changing her mind. The Apprentice had offered her some shoes, some water and biscuits, besides sending her to the lieutenant. But Killian had done so much more, not once hesitating to help her whenever he could, postponing his departure on the seas to help her find her way back home and even risking his own life, in the meantime saving hers several times despite what she had said about being the only one who saves her. And he didn't seem to lose hope; even though they had not found a magic bean, he seemed to keep thinking they could find another way, and was inviting her to join the crew. Getting aboard the Jewel of the Realm seemed to be her best chance.

But riding a horse, climbing a beanstalk, or even running away from a giant, were not the thoughts keeping her awake; it was not what she was the most scared of. Other thoughts, mainly corresponding to very brief moments, kept running through her mind: besides the lieutenant's unlimited kindness, there had been all those times when there had been something more. What was there with these bright blue eyes she couldn't stop staring at? Tactile memories of his fingers brushing her chin, of his hand briefly reaching for hers, or of his soft but at the same time secure arms holding her against him, were recurring; and scaring her. She had spent years building up some protective walls, walls who were preventing anyone from coming too close, walls who were keeping her from being hurt. Her fingers closed around her pendant, the one she was keeping to remind herself not to trust anyone. It had worked until then, it had kept her safe. But now she was afraid: in barely more than twenty-four hours, Killian had made her feel in a way she shouldn't feel. She could see that her walls were crumbling down. She was putting herself in danger, she had to escape. Going back to the Apprentice was the best thing to do.

At last, late at night, Emma fell asleep. She woke up when the first morning lights filtered through her window. Her night had not been long enough, but thoughts were already running through her mind; going back to sleep was unthinkable.

Once down in the street, Emma had only walked past a couple houses towards the forest before she stopped, her eye caught by something. Even with her decision made about where to go, she was still unsure how long she would need to stay in this realm before being back in Boston. She was also tired of everyone looking her up and down because of her outfit which didn't fit here. She sneaked to the back of the garden, where the washing was hanging. Some of the clothes looked like they were the perfect size for her. Quickly, she changed into these new clothes, traded the ankle boots she had for some black boots. Leaving the golden coins that remained after she had paid her dinner and her night at the tavern, her own clothes rolled up under her arm, she walked back to the street. She turned right, towards the forest and away from the docks, with the decision to go back to the Apprentice in mind. But like she had done all night, she considered again the two options. The Apprentice would probably stay in his cottage. Killian, however, would leave in the morning. What would she lose by staying one week on the ship?

"Damn it." Emma changed her mind again: she turned around and walked towards the docks. If the village was still quiet in the early morning, sailors were already active. From afar, she thought she had recognized Killian on deck, but it happened to be his brother.

Liam flashed her a smile. "Welcome aboard again, Miss Swan."

"Where is Killian?" When hearing her voice, Emma realized she sounded in a rush and perhaps should have taken the time to reply to the captain, or at least give him his smile back. But he didn't seem to take it badly.

"In his cabin, last door on the left, right before the captain's quarters," he replied with a bright smile which reminded her of Killian's.

"Thanks." Ignoring the sailors watching her, she calmly walked down the stairs, preferring not to crash into the lieutenant like she had done the first time. Lightly, she knocked on the door, which opened quickly.

"Swan! I was hoping it'd be you." Killian was hardly repressing a beam.

"One week," she simply said. But Killian didn't seem to be listening. He was examining her new outfit: her black boots, her blueish leather pants, her long-sleeved ecru shirt with her blue vest and her belt. "I haven't stolen anything. I left all my golden coins."

Killian looked up with a smile. "I wouldn't dare blaming you for your pirate ways. No, I was just thinking it was fitting you very well." He stepped back, indicating her to enter. "Welcome to your quarters. If there is anything that you need, you can just ask."

Emma nodded, looking around. The style was the same as in the captain's quarters but much less spacious, with just enough room for a bed, a wardrobe, and a small desk by the window.

After a quick visit of the ship, it was time to leave. The lieutenant led Emma back on deck, where the crew was gathered in line, receiving the captain's instructions. Killian went to stand next to his brother. Emma stayed a bit behind, pretending to gaze at the ocean in front of them, avoiding all the curious looks from the sailors. Liam noticed he didn't have his crew's attention anymore. With a move of the head, he indicated Emma to come closer. Now standing between the two brothers, she was still avoiding the sailors' looks.

"Miss Swan is our guest. She's welcome aboard as long as she wants to stay."

"But she's a woman."

"Nice observation, Mr Smee." Killian had replied instantly. But Mr Smee wasn't the only one to react. While some of them were casting glances at each other, several sailors expressed their opinions at the same time.

"Captain, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"That is insane!"

"Women on board are bad luck. We will sink in the middle of the ocean."

"We're not allowed to bring our wives aboard, and because he's the lieutenant he can?"

This was even worse than what Emma had expected. Liam was about to reply but once again, Killian was faster and went to stand in front of the sailor.

"If you want to be with your wife, I won't hold you back, you can leave. If you want to stay, I advise you to watch your words." His voice became louder as he addressed all the sailors who were now quiet, while slowly walking past them. "The captain said Emma is welcome aboard, you have no right to question his decision. I won't tolerate such behaviour aboard this ship, and I will personally make sure the first one being disrespectful towards her walk the plank." He stopped in front of one of the men and took a bottle out of his pocket. "Rum, sailor? Is that how you spent the evening? Drinking? Drunkenness leads to bad form, and bad form won't be tolerated."

Confiscating the bottle, Killian went back to Emma, who had watched him all the way. It was the first time she was seeing him like this, and also the first time someone was doing such a thing for her; he had not hesitated standing up for her, opposing himself to all his men, in the meantime showing her again his good ways. He pulled her aside while Liam finished giving his instructions. One hand on her shoulder, looking down into her eyes, Killian's voice was soft again.

"Are you alright?"

Emma nodded. "Thank you, for defending me."

"They had no right to treat you like this, even if I expected they would react in such a way. Emma, I've told you I would keep you safe. I invited you aboard, it is now my duty to protect you." Killian looked up and caught Liam's eye: it was time. “You're free to stay on deck or go back to your cabin. If any of them tells you anything wrong, come to me." He searched her eyes for another second, making sure she was fine before turning to his men. "To your stations!"

Emma decided to stay on deck, curious to see the departure. She found a spot against the railing of the ship, out of the sailors' way. Killian had joined his brother, who was behind the wheel.

"All hands prepare to set sail, make speed!"

Emma was staring at Killian. He really looked at ease, standing next to his brother, supervising his crew. It was easy to see he belonged there. At these thoughts, Emma had a knot in her stomach. The lieutenant may belong here, but she didn't. What was she doing here? Had she made the right choice, choosing Killian over the Apprentice, who seemed to know much more about magic? Scared, she looked at the ocean, trying to keep a steady breath while they were leaving. The docks were already far behind when half the sailors went downstairs. Killian came to stand next to her, a bright smile on his lips.

"Where did they all go?"

"Enjoying their free time. There are two teams. One of them is on deck, while the other one is off duty. Then, every four hours, it changes. There are six watches during the day. You will hear a bell ringing, it makes us keep track of time."

Emma listened carefully, for a moment distracted from her thoughts and fears. "So, you're in the second team?"

"For Liam and I, it's a bit different. We usually take two watches in the row, so that the other one can get some rest. There are also some watches when we're working together. It depends. Right now, I'm free."

Emma felt the knot in her stomach again. Everyone had a planning to follow, duties to accomplish, and she was just there, among men who mostly thought she would only bring them bad luck. Killian's smile faded a little as he looked her in the eye.

"You’re regretting your decision to come aboard. Or at least wondering if you made the right choice." It was not even a question. Emma didn't reply anything, once again struck by his ability to understand her with only one look. "We will find a way to bring you home. Come with me, there are these books I'd like to show you."

She followed him to the captain's quarters. Books were lined up on the shelves under the windows.

"These ones are logbooks, the ones we write to keep track of our journeys. These ones are about sailing, these ones about astronomy. And here are the ones you can be interested in," he said, indicating an entire shelf of books. "They're about the different lands of this realm, and about magic. Perhaps you'll find something in one of them. I should go back on deck. Just know that you're free to go wherever you want on this ship. You can go back to your cabin, but you can also go on deck or stay in these quarters if you want to."

Killian left. Emma trailed her fingers over the spines of the books. All of them were alike, with leather covers in different shades of brown. She went back to the left side of the shelf, and took the first book, a quite voluminous one. Like on the book which had brought her to this realm, nothing but the title was written: ‘Misthaven: a History of Magic’. There was no picture inside: no risk to be brought to another realm, she thought. Going back to the lieutenant’s cabin, she sat at the desk. And as every time she was reading, it only took her a few minutes before being totally engrossed in the book.

In the middle of the afternoon, Killian came to check on her. But duty called again, and soon he had to go back on deck. Emma went back to reading. She was finding these stories about magic and sorcerers fascinating, so incredible that she couldn’t keep in mind they were actually real.

She didn’t hear the knock on her door a few hours later. Seeing she had not noticed him, Killian entered, trying not to make any sudden move so he would not scare her like he had already done a few times. But despite his efforts, she jumped and a light giggle escaped her.

“You did it again.”

“I didn’t mean to, but you looked quite passionate about your reading. Anything interesting?”

“Very interesting, but nothing that can help me go back home.”

“Don’t lose hope, there are many other books. Later, I should have time to help you. In the meantime, dinner?” he asked, showing her one of the bowls he was holding which, too much focused on his eyes, she had not seen.

Killian placed the bowl on the desk and hesitated, tempted to stay with her but unwilling to encroach upon her living space; the room was small, he didn’t want to impose on her.

“I’ll be on deck, if you want to join for dinner,” he said.

“Thanks. But I will stay here, I want to finish this chapter first.”

“As you wish.”

This was only after finishing her chapter and the next one, and eating the mix of fish, rice and vegetables, that she finally went out of her cabin. She had planned to go to the captain’s quarters only to put the book away, but once there she found herself distracted. A book covered in black leather, similar to those Killian had called logbooks, was open on the desk. Emma leant closer, but it didn’t help her deciphering what was written; probably only a sailor could understand all those words, numbers and abbreviations. Curious, she examined the quill and dipped the tip of it in the bottle of ink, trying it on one corner of the page. Her attention was then drawn to the map unfolded on the desk, covering most of its surface. It looked like no map she had ever seen; she didn’t even know whether she was looking at it the right way or whether it was upside down.

“Interested in sky maps, Miss Swan?”

Emma jumped and looked up at Liam, who was followed by his brother. Sky maps; now she knew why it didn’t look like any other map she had seen. “I just came to put a book back on the shelf, but this caught my eye.”

“It’s alright,” said Liam. “You’re free to use or look at anything you may find aboard this ship.”

“Emma, would you be interested to go on deck?” asked Killian. “The night is clear, it is quite pleasant up there.”

After spending her day in the cabin, the idea of going out was appealing. She nodded and followed him. No sailor said anything about her presence aboard; they glanced at Killian when he appeared from below deck, ready to receive new orders, but went back to their work as the lieutenant remained silent. The fresh air of the night was enjoyable.

“Have you ever stargazed?” he asked.

“Have I ever… Oh.” She had looked up at the sky. “I’ve never seen so many stars.”

Smiling, Killian stepped over the railing of the ship and sat down at the precise spot where she had been standing in the morning, close to the bow. He held out his hand to her, inviting her to join him. She looked over the railing at the ocean below.

“Is it safe?”

“It is if you stay on the railing,” he flashed her a smile, his hand still held out. “Do you really think I’d let you fall down and drown?”

She smiled back and, placing her hand in his, hesitantly stepped over the railing and sat down next to the lieutenant. At first intending to leave some space between them, she ended up sitting right next to him, and even let him place his arm in her back, making her feel more secure this way.

“I take it you haven’t stargazed a lot.”

Emma shook her head. “In this place where I live, there are many city lights. So many that we can’t see the stars.”

“You can’t see the stars? Starless nights are dull. This is one of the things I enjoy about sailing; in the middle of the ocean, there is no light to interfere with the stars.”

“This is beautiful.” Emma was looking up at the sky again. She had never suspected there were so many stars.

“Aye, one of the most beautiful things,” he said. Feeling like she was being watched, Emma looked down: Killian was gazing at her. The intensity of his stare made her look away and focus on the stars again. She was thankful for the night as she felt her cheeks heat up.

“Do you know how to recognize all of them?” she asked him.

“Not all of them, there are too many. Only the major ones. Once you know them, they’re easy to find.” Killian glanced at the starry sky. “Here.”

He pointed at the sky on Emma’s right and, his arm securely wrapped around her, leant closer to her so that he would show her the right spot. Feeling his head so close to hers, Emma felt her cheeks heat up again. He was so close that she could hear him breathing and smell his scent.

“Can you see the bright star, over there?”

It required Emma some effort to focus on the sky again. “Yes, I can see it.”

“This star is called Deneb. And if you follow a line in this direction, you will meet three other stars. You see them?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Now, there is another line passing by the second star,” he said, pointing at the line he could see, and giving Emma some time to find it.

“I can’t see that one. Is it…?”

“Here.”

Killian came even closer, so close that his cheek was against hers as he pointed at the line again. Due to this proximity, Emma’s eyes closed and she had to think of reopening them to see the stars the lieutenant was pointing.

“Found them! How are these stars more interesting than the other ones?” Emma asked, not taking her eyes off of the stars, afraid she would not find them again if she looked away. Killian sat up straight, leaving some space between them.

“All of these stars belong to one constellation; we can say it is yours: the Swan constellation.”

Forgetting about not looking away from the constellation, Emma glanced at Killian, who was once again staring at her. A soft sigh escaped her and she leant her head against his shoulder, looking up at the sky.

“I can see the stars, but I don’t see how that’s supposed to be a swan,” she said.

Killian smiled, leaning his head against hers as he indicated the stars again. “It requires a bit of imagination. You can see a flying swan if you consider Deneb as its tail and the first line as its neck. The second line and some other less bright stars are its wings.”

“Okay, seen that way, it can work.”

The lieutenant pointed other constellations, helping her identifying the stars and showing her how they were forming some patterns. Emma sat up straight when a light flashed across the sky.

“What was that?”

“A shooting star; a little rock burning up and shining as it goes through the protective walls of our world,” said Killian, locking his eyes on her. “Ephemeral, being part of our life for only a very limited time, and yet so fascinating.”

Emma’s lips parted but she didn’t find anything to reply. With the feeling he might not be talking about the shooting star, she leant her head against his shoulder again, escaping the intensity of his stare.

“Maybe there will be more of them,” she said, looking up at the sky.

“Perhaps.”

They stargazed, silently waiting for other shooting stars. Emma felt her eyelids grow heavy with tiredness, but she was not willing to go back to her cabin now. Lulled by the sound of the waves underneath them and feeling the warmth of his body so close to her, she was fighting to keep her eyes open.

Something warm grazed her cheek and she heard a whisper. “Emma.”

She looked up. Killian was smiling at her, the back of his fingers still close to her cheek. “You’re falling asleep.”

Embarrassed, Emma sat up straight and let Killian lead her back to her cabin. They awkwardly stood in front of the door, gazing at each other; Emma was wondering whether she should just go inside or whether she could close the distance between them one more time. Realizing she was now staring at his lips, she shook her head.

“Good night,” she said, entering her room.

“Good night, Emma,” he barely had time to reply before she closed the door.

Emma sat down on the bed. Now that he was out of sight, her way of thinking changed; she could clearly think of this time spent on deck. Her elbows leaning on her knees, she buried her face in her hands. She thought of how she had let him hold her close to him, or how she had been leaning her head against his shoulder, when she had not been staring at him. She had totally drifted, indulging herself by letting him be so close. What had she done? From now on, she would have to be more careful. No matter how good it had felt, she didn’t want to feel this way, she couldn’t take the risk to let a man be so close to her. Where was he now? Was he back on deck already, or was he wandering around the captain’s quarters, asking himself similar questions? What was he thinking, after seeing how easily he could get close to her? She should have kept her distance. But somehow she didn’t want to. Exhausted, she laid down and rolled on her stomach, crossing her arms under the pillow. She bit her lip as she noticed a pleasant smell on it which she instantly identified: his scent. It didn’t help her focus, but thoughts still kept running through her mind until she fell asleep. Facing an inner struggle, the only thing she knew was that she was in trouble with this man.


	6. A Mistake

In the morning, Emma took several books to her cabin. The only clear idea she had come up with during the night was that the more books she would read, the more likely she would be to find a way back home. The faster she would be back in Boston, the better it would be; every moment spent on this ship was a risk to get closer to the lieutenant. But her worries vanished as soon as the man in question came into her room. He had a few hours off duty. Taking one of the books, Killian settled down on the bed.

While reading, Emma felt like she was being watched and glanced sideways. Lying on the bed, leaning on his elbow, Killian was staring at her. Repressing a smile, she went back to her reading, from time to time glancing at him; sometimes he was reading, but sometimes she was able to furtively catch his eye.

“I can’t focus,” she said at some point, realizing at the end of a page that she had no idea what it was about.

“Why not?”

Emma bit her lip. “I can feel your eyes on me.”

“My apologies,” he said with an amused smile. “It’s just after all these years spent only with men, having you aboard makes things different. I am simply enjoying this new way to see life. But I can go to the captain’s quarters if that can help you focus.”

“No, you can stay.” She bit her lip once more, knowing she was drifting again.

Like the first day, Emma spent most of her time reading, Killian staying with her until he had to go back on deck. In the evening, he came back, a serious look in his eyes.

“Emma? There is something I wanted to ask you.” Curious, Emma closed her book and watched him come sit down on the bed next to her. “It is about tomorrow. In the end of the afternoon, we will make our first stopover. It won’t be long, Liam just needs to see someone, it is part of the mission from the Queen. But where we go next depends on you. If you want to stay here only for a week, then it is about time that we take you back.”

“Take me back?”

“To the Apprentice. Wasn’t it your plan to go back to him?”

“Oh, yes.”

Biting her lip, she looked into his eyes, again facing an inner struggle. The truth was that she had not thought about the Apprentice since coming aboard. And after only two days spent on the ocean, she was not ready to think of going back already. The best thing about the lieutenant’s ability to read in her eyes was that he could understand without her needing to find the words.

“Even if you said you’d stay one week when you arrived, you are welcome to stay longer,” he said, smiling as he felt her hesitation. “We just need to know whether we’re going back or continuing our journey. What do you want to do?”

“If I decide to go back to the Apprentice, it means you have to go back all the way because of me.” This was something she had not thought about when deciding to come aboard. “How is that not going to have consequences on your mission? Don’t you have any timing to respect?”

“This is not for you to worry about this. If we need to go back for you, we will. It is entirely up to you.”

Emma gazed into his eyes. She knew what she wanted. She also knew she would regret it whenever he would leave the room, but it didn’t stop her. “I’ll stay a bit longer. All these books, there are so many things about magic, one of them will surely give me a solution. I just need time to find it.”

Her words sounded like a lie to her; she was not convinced the books were her main reason to stay. Killian looked satisfied.

“This is all I needed to know. Stay as long as you wish, and if you want to go back, just tell us and we’ll bring you back. Liam needs me on deck, I have to go. Good night, Emma.” Without giving her time to see him coming, he leant towards her and pressed a soft kiss on her cheek before getting up and leaving the cabin. A hand on her cheek, Emma stared at the closed door.

* * *

There was agitation on deck the next morning. Emma had decided to go outside, and though she had not spent much time there, she felt like something was going on. Seeing the two brothers together, discussing while looking at the horizon, only confirmed her impressions. A ship was coming their way.

“Who’s that?” she asked the two men.

“The Black Navy,” said Liam.

“Are they pirates?”

“No, they’re working for the Queen.” Killian sounded concerned, Emma didn’t understand why.

“You’re also working for her, are you in the Black Navy too?”

“No, the Queen has different kinds of ships at her orders,” Liam replied, staring at the ship coming to them.

“I wonder what they want. Liam?” The captain turned to his brother, who indicated Emma with a tilt of the head. Liam nodded and Killian turned to Emma. “Come with me.”

Without waiting, he grabbed her hand and led her below deck, at the floor even below their quarters, into a room at the end of the corridor; probably the least accessible room on the ship. Emma remembered something he had said about treasures when they were at the top of the beanstalk and blushed at the thought of his words: ‘I would keep the most precious ones as far as possible from the entrance, in the least accessible place.’

“Killian?”

He didn’t reply and closed the door behind them. Bunks were built in the walls; they were apparently in one of the sailors’ cabins. The lieutenant still looked concerned when he went to the back of the room and lifted up one of the bunks.

“Killian, what’s happening?”

“I want you to hide in here,” he said, indicating the spot under the bunk. “As soon as possible, I will come back for you. It shouldn’t take more than an hour.”

“Killian, what’s wrong? What do they want?”

“I don’t know why they’re coming. All I know is that they might search the ship and I don’t want them to find you.”

“Why?” Emma was struggling to understand. Killian looked down.

“Because the Black Navy is not known to be nice, and we are not supposed to have guests on board,” he said, guilt tinting his words.

“Killian, did you break the rules because of me?”

When he looked up, his eyes were saying it all.

“Emma, please promise me you will stay in here until I come back.”

She glanced at the spot under the bunk and looked back at him. She was not willing to be locked in such a narrow place, but he already looked troubled enough. “I promise.”

“I’ll come back as soon as I can,” he said once she was inside.

Time went by slowly. Emma didn’t like not knowing what was happening. She also didn’t like the idea of being a stowaway; considering her past, being clandestine was not a major problem to her. What was bothering her the most was to imagine the brothers being in trouble because of her.

Finally, the door opened. But there was more than just one man; at least three or four of them, according to the sound of the footsteps. This made her blood run cold and she froze in a corner of her hiding spot. She could hear some noises; it sounded like one of the men was searching the room. Emma held her breath, hoping he would not think of checking under the bunk.

“There’s nothing here,” said an unfamiliar voice. Emma relaxed and breathed again.

“Was this the last cabin?” asked a second unfamiliar voice.

“Aye,” replied Liam. “I told you there was nothing to be found aboard this ship.”

“It is the procedure, sir,” said the second unfamiliar voice.

“I understand. May I lead you back on deck?”

And the footsteps faded away as the men left. Catching her breath, Emma wondered if it was safe to go out or if she should wait for Killian. But at this moment, the bunk was lifted up and the lieutenant came into view.

“Emma, are you alright?”

He held out his hand and pulled her into a hug. Closing her eyes and wrapping her arms around him, she almost forgot to reply.

“I am,” she replied after a few seconds. She softly broke the embrace to look into his eyes. “What did they want?”

“Nothing you have to worry about. Let’s go back upstairs.” He led her back to her cabin. “Stay here for now. I need to talk to my brother. I’ll be right back.”

At first, Emma complied: she took a book and sat down on the bed. But after reading only one page, she closed it; she still didn’t know what the Black Navy was on the ship for, and she had got this feeling the lieutenant was holding something back when telling her she didn’t have to worry.

Quietly going out of her cabin, she saw the door to the captain’s quarters standing ajar. The brothers were inside.

“They’re all blaming her,” she heard the lieutenant say on a reproachful tone. Feeling a dead weight fall into her stomach, she leant against the wall, listening carefully.

“We’re lucky none of them revealed her presence: this visit could have gone much worse,” said the captain. “Killian, our men behaved until now, and they’ll keep behaving. Now, our only problem is this delay. More than one day and a half won’t be easy to catch up.”

Emma felt this dead weight in her stomach even more; one day and a half, this was the time the Jewel of the Realm had stayed on the docks because of her. She burst into the quarters.

“This is all my fault, I shouldn’t have come.”

The Jones brothers looked up at her.

“Emma, I’ve told you to stay in your cabin.”

“And I haven’t listen,” she instantly replied. “You, your entire crew, you’re all in trouble because of me. Tonight, when you make a stopover, you have to leave me. Wherever it is, I will try to find my way from here. You don’t need me here, I will only get you into trouble.”

The next second, Killian was standing right in front of her, his hands cupping her cheeks and making her look up at him.

“Emma, don’t say this. It’s alright.”

“Miss Swan, a word please.”

Glancing at Liam, she looked at Killian again, worried, wondering what the captain wanted with her. The lieutenant inquiringly glanced at his brother, who nodded. Killian pressed a kiss on her forehead, which made her eyes close. When she opened them again, she was alone with the captain.

“Please sit down,” Liam said, sitting behind his desk. Hesitantly, Emma sat in front of him.

“You agree with me, don’t you?”

“Agree about what, Miss Swan?”

“You are late because of me, in trouble with the Queen by my fault.”

“I will admit you’re not totally wrong. But there are things you need to know. I never really had the occasion to talk to you, but now that I have, let me tell you this: when Killian asked me for the permission to invite you and I accepted, we were both aware there were risks. We both know the Queen is not as accommodating as the King we used to work for. The King we were working for was a very honorable man. But one day he sent us for a mission to a place called Neverland. We only spent a few weeks there but something happened on our way back. When we were back in the Enchanted Forest, everything had changed. The King’s castle had been replaced by another castle, and when we asked about the King himself, the inhabitants seemed uncertain; among the ones who knew who he was, some of them told us his reign had ended two hundred years ago, some others said it had ended three hundred years ago.”

“Three hundred years?” Emma repeated, astonished. She had read about many things, and even seen a lot herself since her arrival in this realm, but this sounded unbelievable. “How is that possible?”

“This happened years ago, and it still remains unclear. Our first hypothesis is that, somehow, a portal led us there and took us back. Neverland would then be in another realm where time goes by much slower than it does here. Our second hypothesis is that, perhaps, a time portal was opened on our way back and made us travel through time, to the future.”

“You can go through a portal without seeing it?”

“I don’t know,” shrugged the captain. “If you have any other hypothesis, you are welcome to share. The only thing we know for sure is that many years have gone by; Killian and I knew nobody but the King on land, but none of the men of our crew who were looking forward to be reunited with their family found them. We went to the Queen. She happened to be very interested in what we had found in Neverland; what we’ve been asked by the King to bring back. We’ve been working for her since then. But I’m drifting, there; the point is that we know the Queen, and we knew there were risks in inviting you aboard. But it’s worth it.”

Liam pulled his chair closer, crossing his arms on the desk, staring at Emma with a quite intense look, though not as intense as Killian’s. Emma was listening carefully as he went on.

“I’ve known Killian since always; I was already a few years old when he was born. Our childhood wasn’t one of the brightest. He was still a child when we lost our dear mother. He was very close to her, even closer than I was. For years, he never really got over this loss. He remained quite a sad and introverted boy. Our father abandoning us during our teenage years made things even worse. But we were lucky enough to be together, we had each other. When we’ve been enrolled in the Navy, I discovered a new Killian. Sailing is what he loves and being on the ocean gave me the chance to see my brother smile again. Now, you may wonder why I am telling you all of this.”

Emma was biting the inside of her lip as a part of the brothers’ story was revealed to her. She had been so focused on Liam’s tale that she had actually not been wondering why he was telling her this. Since she was not saying anything, the captain continued.

“The reason why I’m telling you this is that I’ve never seen Killian smiling as brightly as he has been these past few days. He really takes to heart this mission to bring you home. To him, it is much more important than whatever the Queen wants. And the most important to me is my brother’s happiness. This is why I want you to understand this: being late in our mission for the Queen is something that I am more than ready to do for him, and for you.”

Emma tried not to show the captain how astonished she was by these words. “I guess this means you won’t let me leave tonight.”

Liam smiled. “Very unlikely, indeed. This was all I wanted to say to you, you are now free to go back to your cabin.”

Instead of going back to her cabin like the captain had suggested, Emma went out on deck. She ignored the looks of the sailors and went straight to Killian, who was watching his crew from the upper deck and beamed when he saw her coming to him.

“What did my brother want to tell you?”

“He explained why I was wrong in thinking I should leave.”

“Did he convince you?”

“Yes.” She was staring at him again. After the stories Liam had told her, she was now seeing him in a different way. He was not the mysterious lieutenant she knew nothing about anymore, but a man who had been through a tough childhood, an introverted boy who had lost both his parents; an orphan, much like her.

“Is everything fine?”

“Yes. I’ll go back to my reading now.” Before she could stop herself, she walked to him and tiptoed to press a soft and furtive kiss on his cheek. She felt his eyes following her as she went back below deck.

* * *

Though very interesting, the books Emma spent most of her time reading didn’t give her any information about travels between the realms or about magic beans. As planned, they made a stopover, but only the captain and a few of his men disembarked; Emma barely noticed, staying in her cabin with Killian, still looking for this solution. The next day and the day after, she found nothing new. With all this reading, she was feeling dazed.

When Emma woke up in the morning, she was confused; she had no memory of going to bed. She tried to think of what she had done the evening before. The last thing she remembered was sitting at the desk, fighting sleep as she was reading, considering going on deck to enjoy some fresh air. But she didn’t remember going there. She didn’t even remember having dinner. Giving up on trying to remember, Emma got up and went on deck. It was still early; the sun was only starting to appear above the horizon. From behind the wheel, Killian flashed her a smile.

“You’re awake early, today,” he said when she had joined him. “Hungry, perhaps?”

“Hungry?” she repeated, surprised by the question.

“You didn’t have dinner last night, you were already asleep when I came.”

Emma was about to reply but no word came. Now there was an explanation to why she didn’t remember the evening. “Did you…?” The idea of the lieutenant tucking her in made her cheeks heat up.

“Aye, I hope it’s alright. I couldn’t let you sleep on the desk. At first I thought you had awakened; when you were in my arms, you opened your eyes. But you fell back asleep straight away.”

“I… Thank you.” Emma pretended to look at the rising sun so that she could hide her face from him, wishing she could stop blushing.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?”

“Very.” She turned back to him. He was smiling at her, a sparkle in his eyes.

“Do you want to try?” he asked with a tilt of the head towards the wheel.

Emma opened wide eyes. “I don’t know how to.”

“This is why I offer to show you,” he said, stepping aside and keeping only one hand on the wheel.

Though unsure about it, he looked so enthusiast about the idea of teaching her that she didn’t feel like rejecting the offer and stepped closer to the wheel.

“You’ll see, there’s nothing complicated.”

The lieutenant went to stand behind her. Emma felt his fingers softly closing around her wrists and, one after the other, placed her hands on the wheel.

“For now, all you have to do is to hold the wheel in this position.”

His hands until then covering hers, he slowly let go of the wheel. Emma was surprised by how heavy it was; she was feeling like the ship would drift to the right if she didn’t hold it.

“The most important is the look. Where you look at, the ship will go,” the lieutenant explained. “Look at the horizon right in front of you and the ship will follow.”

The instructions were clear but Emma was distracted; while he talked, she felt his hand landing on her hip and his cheek coming against hers as he pointed the horizon in front of them. She had hardly been able to ignore her heart racing when his hands were covering hers; now, she was trying to keep her eyes open and to resist the temptation to lean back against him. But Killian soon gave her some space as he went to stand on her right to assess how she was managing, Emma’s eyes following him. An amused smile tugged at his lips.

“Remember, where you look at, the ship will go. Lose control and the elements will take the upper hand,” he said. “Check the position of the wheel.”

Distracted as she was looking at him, she had failed at maintaining the wheel. With the wind and the waves, the ship was deviating. She quickly put it back into position, focusing on the horizon, and the Jewel of the Realm was on its path again.

“Here you go, in control of the ship. Well done, Captain Swan.”

At his words, a smile brightened her features. Not disliking it, she stayed there for a moment, until deciding she should go back to reading. Again, she had not succeeded in keeping her distances. The inner struggle was still the same; she was afraid of her feelings, more and more with every passing day. But whenever he was around, she was forgetting about trying to stay away and was letting him come close, sometimes wishing he would come even closer.

The next time she went back on deck was in the evening. At the end of his watch, Killian joined her at this spot where they had been stargazing and sat down on the railing by her side. Both watching the sunset, he was the one to break the silence.

“Tell me more about you.”

Emma turned to him, startled by the request. “What do you want me to tell you?”

“Anything. I may have let you believe that I can read you like an open book, but your eyes don’t say it all.”

“There is nothing interesting to know about me.”

“I’m not the one with the ability to know when someone is lying to me, but I don’t believe this.”

Emma watched the sunset. She wished she had something interesting to tell. The lieutenant didn’t believe her, but she felt like it was the truth: nothing in her past was worth being told. Killian seemed to notice her unease.

“Emma, I just want you to know that if you don’t want to say anything, you don’t have to. I only asked out of curiosity.”

“It’s alright. I’ve just thought of something: I remember the first time I watched a sunset like this, with the sun disappearing behind the ocean. This is one of my best memories. I was twelve or thirteen. It was the first time I went hiking. From the beach, we walked a few hours and spent the evening at the top of the cliffs. We picnicked there. The sunset was beautiful. This foster family was one of my favorites.”

A tender smile was on his lips as he listened to her. Her last words made him raise an eyebrow, and curiosity got the best of him. “What about your birth parents?”

“I’ve never met them, I don’t even know who they are. I was abandoned as a baby and spent my childhood being shuffled from one foster family to the next. That is until I had had enough of this and decided to make my own way,” she said, her eyes locked on the horizon. She was biting the inside of her lip, breathing deeply to fight back the tears. She turned to him. “I’ve told you there was nothing interesting to know about me.”

“A childhood imprinted with sadness and loneliness doesn’t make you uninteresting,” he said, softly cupping her chin and letting her drown in the tenderness filling his eyes while he was searching hers. “Have you ever been in love?”

Disconcerted by the question, Emma kept looking into his eyes. “Maybe,” was the only answer she could come up with. “But we’ve talked only about me. Your turn, now.”

“Can I say something about any moment of my life?”

“Yes.” The lieutenant could tell her anything he wanted. All she wanted was to stop talking about her.

“What I have to say is about this past week,” he said. Emma had a knot in her stomach and held her breath until hearing what he had to say. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m glad we didn’t find a magic bean.”

“You’re glad I didn’t find a way to go back home?”

“If you had, it means you would be back in your realm by now, away from me, probably forever.” Killian glanced at the sunset to look away from her for a second. “I know this sounds selfish, but let me explain, or at least try to,” he said, his eyes locked on hers again, Emma’s heart racing. “From the start, I wasn’t willing to let you go, and this wasn’t only because of the prophecy. When you walked into me, the first time we met, I drowned into your eyes. The only thing I wanted was to know more about you: who were you, to simply bump into me and make me lose myself the way you did? Then we went up that beanstalk and I knew, I knew I didn’t want to let you go. You burst into my life and lightened my world, and may you be, for me, as ephemeral as a shooting star, I still wish this time I have with you will be as long as possible.”

Staring into these bright blue eyes, Emma was drowning. She had spent the week struggling, trying to hide behind her walls, fighting her feelings and this temptation to give in to him; hearing his words was all it took to shatter the few resistance she had left. She slowly shifted closer and, her eyes closing, allowed their lips to meet. Softly capturing his bottom lip with hers, she shifted even closer, one hand resting on his thigh while the other one slipped in his neck. The way his lips were moulding hers made a fire burn inside her. She melted even more when she felt his hands in her back and in the back of her head, pulling her even closer. Their foreheads leaning against each other as they caught their breath, his fingers trailed along her jaw and brushed her chin, and she captured his lips again, their kiss becoming even more passionate. At last, breathless, foreheads and noses touching, they kept their eyes closed.

“That was…” Killian whispered and Emma bit her lip.

“A mistake.”


	7. Mayhem on the Ocean

Opening her eyes, realizing what she had done, Emma quickly took her hands off him and stood up.

“Don’t follow me.”

Her breathing was still fast and her heart still racing when she went back to her cabin. Closing the door, she leant back against it and took her fingers to her lips. She closed her eyes, remembering the moment, thinking of his lips against hers, of his hands in her back and in her hair, of his breath against her lips when their foreheads were in contact, and of this feeling inside her, this passion which had made her capture his lips again. So many times she had wondered about what he was thinking, and he had finally told her. The kindness in his eyes and the softness in his voice when he had described their first meeting or compared her to a shooting star had made her melt and she had drifted. Emma let herself slide down against the door. Sitting on the floor, she hid her face in her knees. What had she done? When she was with him, it was so easy to drift. She had crossed the lines and if she was unable to resist him when he was around, she would have to stay away from him; this was the only way.

Lying back on the bed, it took her a long time before falling asleep. She spent the two next days reading in her cabin. The only times when she saw Killian was when he brought her dinner. And each time, she didn’t let him in.

“Emma, are you alright?” he asked the second time.

“Yes. But I have things to do… Books to read.”

“Perhaps I can help you?”

“No. I prefer to stay alone. Thanks for dinner.”

Taking the bowl he had brought her, she barely had time to close the door before tears filled her eyes. Staying away from him was harder than she had expected and it was only reluctantly that she was closing the door. But the worst part was the sadness she could see in his eyes; hurting him was hurting her even more.

The only solution she had in mind was to find something in one of the books, something which would allow her to go back to Boston. This way, she would be away from him; probably forever, as he had said. She would miss him, but she would miss him even more if she spent more time here. Because they would be separated at some point anyway; if life had taught her one thing, it was that good things always come to an end. It was better to be separated as soon as possible, before she would drift again and strenghten her feelings for him.

If, until now, she had found nothing in books but interesting stories about magic, it seemed to change the next morning; maybe she had found a solution. She read a few pages about it before going out of her cabin, the book under her arm. The two brothers were on deck, at different spots. She didn’t hesitate much before deciding where to go.

“Miss Swan! We haven’t seen you much lately,” said the captain.

He didn’t seem surprised that she was coming to him, whereas Killian was only a few metres away. This made Emma think that he knew what had happened. Of course he would, she thought; the brothers were probably talking a lot, surely more than what she was thinking.

“Can I talk to you about something?”

“Of course. Did you find anything?” he asked as he noticed the book she was carrying.

“Maybe. It doesn’t tell me how to go back to my realm, but maybe I’ve found someone who can help. Have you ever heard of the Dark One?”

“I’ve heard stories. How can that help?”

“In the book, it’s said that the Dark One has the most powerful magic. If someone can help, it is him.”

“That’s right. He can probably tell you how to go back. Then, all we need is to find him. Does the book say where to find him?”

Emma softly bit her lip. “Nope, there is nothing about where to find him. I was hoping you would know.”

“Unfortunately I don’t. But soon we will make our second stopover. The men I have to meet there may know something about it. Here’s what we can do: we make this second stopover to do business with these men, I ask them about this Dark One, and then we’ll go and find him. Does it work for you?”

“Yes, it sounds like a nice plan. But you already have a delay because of me, what if this man lives at the other end of the realm?”

“Miss Swan, don’t you remember what I’ve told you a few days ago? What Killian wants is to help you, and I will support him in his choice. We will find a way.”

Once again seeing how devoted to her the two brothers were, and thinking of how she was pushing one of them away, Emma had a lump in her throat. She thanked the captain and headed back to her cabin, looking down at her feet as she walked. What she didn’t know was that Killian had seen her talking with his brother. She had almost reached the passage leading below deck when fingers closed around her arm.

“Emma…”

“Killian,” she said as she turned back to face him. She didn’t know what else to say.

“I know you wanted to be left alone, but I’ve seen you talking to Liam.” He glanced at the book before looking up at her. “You found a solution?”

“Maybe. I’ve read about the Dark One, his magic is the most powerful. We will try to find him, maybe he’ll be able to help.”

“This sounds like a reasonable plan. You will find your way home.”

Killian smiled but Emma couldn’t help noticing the sadness tinting his words. “Killian…”

“I can feel you keep pulling away from me, this is not really how I wanted to spend the little time I have left before you leave. Please just tell me this, have I ever done something wrong?”

“There is nothing you can blame yourself for. It is all me,” she replied, feeling a dead weight in her stomach; she hated hurting him this way, and it seemed to be even worse than what she had expected. Not finding the words to explain him what was wrong with her, she looked him in the eye, hoping that he would understand without words, as he had done so many times. She was holding his stare, letting him search through her eyes; how much she had missed these bright blue eyes.

“If I can’t blame myself, can I at least understand?” he asked. “You look afraid and seem to be fighting some dilemma. Perhaps this dilemma is about where to go? I feel like you can see a future here. A happy one. But for some reason, this future you can see is the origin of your fears. Why?”

Once again, Emma was startled by his ability to read her. He was right; at least about the first part, because she wasn’t sure she had ever considered a future here. But somehow, he was still right; he was thinking the idea of a happy future was what was scaring her. He was close, since what she was afraid of was how good she was feeling with him. And she knew where her fears were coming from.

“I was in love once,” she said. “And after all these years spent in the foster system, feeling like a lost little girl who didn’t matter everytime I was being shuffled from one family to one other, I’ve been foolish enough to believe that being in love meant life would change and become good. I’ve been foolish enough to believe that I could be happy. But I was wrong.”

“And since then, you’ve been running away from any hope of happiness?” he asked, his eyes still searching hers.

“Hope is the worst thing, it makes our expectations too high and leads to disappointment.”

“But it can also make your dreams come true if you take a chance.”

“Killian, I can’t take a chance,” she said, feeling tears being close. “Everytime I’ve tried, it didn’t work. I’ve been broken beyond repair. I can’t be fixed.”

Not taking his eyes off of her, he stepped closer and softly brushed her cheek with the back of his fingers. “At least let me try.”

Emma drowned into his eyes. A faint smile tugging at her lips, she let out a soft sigh.

“I need time.”

“Time before you go back to your realm is almost up.”

“Be patient.” Closing the distance between them, she furtively kissed the corner of his lips.

She didn’t say anything else before going back to her cabin.

* * *

 

The next morning, locked up in her cabin to read more about the Dark One, Emma had no idea about the agitation there was on deck. The crew was worrying about another ship coming closer.

There was a knock on her door.

“Emma, I know I may not be the one you want to see right one, but please open the door, this is important.”

Hearing the rush in his voice, Emma immediately complied.

“What’s happening?”

“The Black Navy, they’re back. Two visits in a few days, this can’t be a good thing. Emma, I need you to hide again.”

Thinking of this moment spent in her hiding spot, waiting for Killian to come back, Emma felt she was close to panic; she didn’t want to go through this again. What if, this time, they found her? But seeing how concerned he was, she didn’t say anything and followed him.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can. Stay here and stay quiet, no matter what, until I, or Liam, come back.”

Her breathing fast, Emma sat down in a corner and waited, listening carefully, trying to hear something coming from deck. But she couldn’t hear anything. She had no way to know the ship of the Black Navy was coming alongside the Jewel of the Realm. Nor could she notice the presence of an unexpected visitor: leading the way, followed by eight men, was a woman dressed all in black, her black hair lifted up in a high ponytail.

“The Queen…” whispered a sailor, stepping aside to get out of her way as she came on board.

“The _Evil_ Queen, dear,” she corrected as she went past him.

While the sailors all stepped back, lining up against the railing on both side of the ship, leaving as much distance as they could between them and the woman, Liam and Killian stepped forward and faced her and her black knights.

“My Queen, this is quite a surprise to see you here. To what do we owe the pleasure of this visit?” asked Liam politely.

“Do not pretend you don’t know why I’m here. You are late. You’ve been warned a first time, but nothing changed. I am disappointed, captain, I was expecting better from you. If you are unable to accomplish your mission in time, you are useless to me.” She then addressed the whole crew, scoping the ship. “Do you know what I do with useless people?”

Her lips stretched into a smirk as she saw the sailors leaning back against the railing, their eyes reflecting their fear.

“Now,” said the Evil Queen, “I may be merciful and spare your life if you give me a reason for this lateness.”

Worried, Killian watched his sailors, trying to catch their eyes and make them understand they had to remain quiet. If the first time they had not said anything, he was afraid that their loyalty might stop when their lives were threatened. And he was right: before he had time to stop him, one of his men stepped forward, barely daring to look the Queen in the eye.

“The lieutenant’s lady, she is the reason. We left two days later because of her.”

“The lieutenant’s lady?” she repeated, a malevolent smile on her lips as she turned to Killian. “Not fulfilling your mission because of a woman, lieutenant? My mother used to say love is weakness.”

“Please, she came to me and asked me for help. I couldn’t leave her, I needed more time on land.”

“You chose her, and the consequences of that decision,” she said without any hint of compassion in her voice. She turned to the black knight on her right. “Go and get her.”

“Don’t touch her!” Without thinking, Killian instantly went to stand in front of the passage leading below deck.

“Thanks, lieutenant, this is all I needed from you,” the Queen said with a smile and a glint in her eyes which made him realize how much this name of Evil Queen suited her. “I now know for sure that your love is somewhere on this ship. Now, out of the way.”

Realizing the Queen had ignored until then whether Emma was aboard or not, Killian hated himself for falling into her trap. He stared at her, not moving from his spot and blocking the passage, his hand on the hilt of his sword, ready to fight if he had to. But this was without taking into account her magic; with a simple move of her hand, he felt his feet leave the ground and landed a few meters away. Standing up again, Killian tried to go back and block the passage, but two other black knights strongly seized his arms and prevented him from moving. Liam went to stand where Killian had been, but he received the same treatment; he was sent away and ended up with two black knights holding him. The crew was watching them, petrified. Killian struggled but didn’t manage to free himself and, powerless, watched the black knight disappear below deck.

In the meantime, Emma was wondering what was happening on deck. She had not moved since Killian had left and was still sitting in her corner, paralyzed by fear; she had never met anyone from the Black Navy, but what she had heard about them after their first visit let her think that things wouldn’t go well if they happened to find her. Hearing some footsteps and the door opening, Emma stopped breathing, afraid to be heard. She hoped it was Killian but soon realized it was surely not him: she heard noises sounding like a dog sniffing something out. She heard the footsteps come closer as the man came straight to her hiding spot and lifted up the bunk.

“Here you are! The Queen wants to see you.”

The Queen? Emma felt her heart race, breathing was difficult. While waiting, she had imagined many scenarios, but none included the Queen herself. Lacking any sensitivity, the black knight grabbed her wrist and pulled her out of her hiding spot. The man smirked as she came into light.

“Now, I understand why the lieutenant would break the rules for you. Such a beautiful woman, besides this delicious smell,” he said, placing her hand on his cheek.

“Don’t touch me!”

She slapped his hand and tried to escape, running towards the deck. But the man was faster; he caught up with her and pinned her against a wall.

“There is no escape. Don’t try to run away, things will go much better if you let me take you to the Queen.”

Emma didn’t really consider the possibility of getting into more trouble: perhaps it was due to the way he was holding her against the wall; she punched him in the face and escaped from him, running towards the way out. The only thing she wanted was to see Killian. All eyes were on her when, panting, she finally arrived on deck.

“Here is our stowaway,” said the Evil Queen.

“Emma!”

The blonde turned around and spotted the two brothers, each of them held prisoners by two guards.

“Release them!” she said, addressing the Queen. “They’ve done nothing wrong, it is all my fault.”

“Emma, no!” said Killian.

Both him and Liam were struggling. Powerless, they watched her walking towards the Queen who was smirking again, staring at her.

“Your fault, this is exactly what this man said.” The woman pointed the sailor who had betrayed his crew; he looked down. “If it is your fault, you will understand that you’re the one who should be punished.”

“Leave her alone! I was the one to invite her aboard, punish me instead!”

The Queen ignored him and walked closer to Emma. At this moment, Killian finally managed to free himself and went to stand between the two women, facing the Queen, protectively hiding Emma.

“She is innocent.”

“Out of my way!”

Again, a simple move of the hand was enough to send him away.

“Killian!” Emma screamed as she saw him flying across the ship until his back hit the mast.

Ropes magically coiled around him, tying him up to the mast. In the meantime, Liam managed to free himself from the black knights. But the Queen noticed his intentions to come and protect Emma: with another move of the hand, he found himself frozen on the move, immobilized.

“Liam!”

The Queen looked around before focusing again on Emma.

“Now that there seems to be no one else to protect you, we can get back to our discussion,” she said, stepping even closer. “We were talking about who should be punished…”

“And I said it was me,” Emma interrupted her, looking her straight in the eye.

“We agree on this point,” said the Evil Queen with a smirk and a malicious glint in her eyes.

Suddenly, Emma felt like she was choking.

“ _Nooo_!”

She didn’t understand why Killian was screaming. She didn’t understand either why it was so difficult to breathe. Then she saw it: the Queen’s hand was inside her chest. Immediately, she understood. She had read about this kind of magic. The Queen was about to rip her heart out. She was about to die. Emma looked back at Killian, a tear rolling down her cheek. While the Queen was pulling on her heart, she kept her eyes locked on him, only wishing he could be here, holding her in his soothing arms one last time. She thought of their first kiss, of this fire burning inside her. Memories were so vivid that she could actually feel her heart burning with passion again. Or was it because it was about to be ripped out? But at this moment, she saw a wave of white light and suddenly felt fresh air filling her lungs. She felt free. Not understanding what had just happened, she took her eyes off of Killian and, astonished, saw that the Queen was on the floor, a few metres away from her.

“Light magic…” she muttered, glaring at Emma. She got up and came back to her. She looked even angrier now. “If I can’t rip your heart out, I will find another way.”

Emma gave the Queen a blank stare, too much astounded to focus, still trying to understand what had happened. But the Queen soon got her attention back.

“Have you ever noticed how this ship is made of wood? Imagine what it would become with this.”

Looking more evil than ever, she turned her hand over and a fireball appeared. Her malevolent smile widened as she watched Emma staring at it. The blonde was reminded of some words one of the sailors had said, when they had set sail with her on board: ‘we will sink in the middle of the ocean.’ Setting fire to the ship would prove him right.

“I have an offer,” said the Queen. “Come with me, alone, and I won’t turn this ship into ashes.”

Emma didn’t hesitate and stepped forward; whatever the Queen had in store for her, she would accept it. She simply couldn’t let her set fire to the Jewel of the Realm. Satisfied, she put the fireball out and indicated her to follow. But the blonde stopped when fingers closed on her hand.

“Emma, please! Don’t do this! Don’t go.”

When the Queen had failed to rip her heart out, being sent away had disconcerted her enough to make her lose control: the ties maintaining Killian against the mast had come loose, loose enough to allow him to free himself from all the ropes. Finally, he had managed to get rid of all of them and was now here, holding her hand, asking her to stay. She wished she could, but she had no choice. Another tear rolled down her cheek. Not having the strength to speak, she locked her eyes on his and made him understand she had to leave. Pulling her to him, Killian closed the distance between them. Her forehead against his, a hand on his cheek, she pressed his hand over her heart. Knowing their time was very limited, she looked up at him.

“Thank you,” she said in a strangled voice. There were so many reasons she could thank him for that she didn’t quote any.

Their time together seemed to be up: lost in each other, they had not heard the Queen losing patience; black knights pulled them apart from each other. Emma felt his fingers brushing her palm and her fingers as she was pulled away. The black knight led her to the ship of the Black Navy. When she looked back, she saw Liam, who had regained his ability to move, holding Killian back. It seemed like he was trying to reason with him, and he was right to do so; Emma knew Killian couldn’t follow her. The Queen would without any doubt light up another fireball if he did. Eyes filled with tears, Emma saw the Jewel of the Realm draw away. Killian was holding onto the railing. Both of them were too much in shock to do anything but stand there and stare at each other, while the Evil Queen was standing behind Emma, watching them, regaled in their pain.


	8. Good Form

The Jewel of the Realm was now too far away for Emma to see Killian. Her look was vacant; she was still unable to process what had happened. It was like she had lost the ability to think, as if she was lost in her thoughts but her mind was empty. She heard the Queen saying something, but the words didn’t register. It was only when the ocean suddenly disappeared from view that Emma looked around; she was now in a circular room with the Queen and a black knight.

“Where’s the ship?”

“Where we left it. I don’t have time to stay on a ship, my ways are much faster.”

“So, now you’re going to kill me?”

“No, that would be too easy. I will just let you rot in here, alone, and out of your suffering will rise my victory.”

These were the Queen’s last words before she smirked and disappeared in a puff of purple smoke. Confused and powerless, Emma didn’t even try to fight the black knight. When she collected herself, she was still standing, facing the stone wall. Her hands were cuffed, a heavy chain was connecting the handcuffs to the floor, in the centre of the circular room. Emma was able to walk around the room, but the chain was too short to let her reach the walls. She tiptoed to see through the high windows – two openings in the stone wall; on both sides she could see the ocean stretching to the horizon. It looked like she was trapped at the top of a tower, on a deserted island. Noticing there was no ship in sight gave her a heartache. She sat down. As hours passed, she regained the ability to think clearly. She looked back on everything that had happened during the day. The fact that she had been quietly reading in her cabin in the very morning was barely believable. From the moment when Killian had knocked on her door, everything had become so complicated. There were so many things she didn’t understand. Having a hand sinking inside her chest had been the weirdest sensation. Emma tried to recall what had happened before she had seen this wave of white light, but soon lost herself in her thoughts as she remembered the way Killian was looking at her while he was tied up to the mast. Her eyes filled with tears as she thought of how he had tried to stop her, of how he had pulled her to him. She remembered the touch of his hand pressed over her heart, and of his fingers brushing her hand while she was pulled away, as if trying to hold onto her until the very last moment. Tears didn’t stop that night, until, exhausted, she fell asleep, lying on the stone floor.

When she woke up the next morning, realizing where she was made her feel sick. Getting up, she tiptoed; there was still no ship on the horizon. She had to find a way out, she had to escape. She couldn’t surrender so easily, it was not the first time she was in a situation which seemed hopeless, and until now she had always found a solution. Thinking, she ignored the round loaf and the glass of water that the black knight brought her. Doing her best to keep calm, Emma thought of what remained to her the biggest mystery: this wave of white light. She was sure she had heard the Queen talk about light magic, and according to what she had read in books, it was very likely that she was right. But _how_ did it happen? She had read it was rare to have magic, and that using it properly required years of practice. How could _she_ , who was not even coming from the Enchanted Forest, have such powers? She spent most of the morning debating about it, wondering whether the light magic could be coming from someone else. But she had not imagined it, she was almost sure the wave of light magic had come from her; she had seen it spreading in the distance, and this was when she had been able to breathe again. It had prevented the Queen from ripping her heart out; it had saved her. ‘Conjuring magic is not intellectual endeavour. It's emotion,’ this was something she had read in one of the books. Emotion; she had thought she was about to die, probably the fear had been strong enough to create this wave of white light. But Emma frowned; she didn’t remember feeling afraid, she had been too much occupied thinking of… She lifted her head up as a new hypothesis formed in her mind. Thinking it was the end, she had let her feelings overwhelm her; these feelings she had spent days to fight and which she couldn’t deny anymore. Sitting on the floor, alone with her thoughts, Emma spent another few hours debating, considering other explanations. But she didn’t find any. At last, her hypothesis was that her feelings for Killian were stronger than she had let herself believe, strong enough to make her feel like her heart was in fire and to trigger the magic.

All these thoughts of magic had a positive impact: they were keeping her mind busy and constituted a glimmer of hope; if she had been able to use magic once, maybe she would find a way to use it again, and maybe she would be able to free herself. Focusing on her handcuffs, she thought of his lips against hers, of his hands in her back, pulling her to him, of this passion burning inside. But nothing happened. She kept staring at her hands, imagining them free, but the handcuffs remained. Focusing more, she was trying to feel her heart burn again. Soon, she was staring at the cuffs blankly, as she was lost in her thoughts. Exhausted, she gave up; she would try again later.

The next day, still hopeful it might work, she tried again. But as hours passed, hope dimmed. Tears started to roll down her cheeks as it dawned on her that she might be trapped in here forever. What she regretted the most was these last days she had spent locked in her cabin while she could have spent them with Killian; now, she would give everything to see him again, even if it was just for one moment, one moment long enough to be in his arms one last time.

She thought of this time when, a decade earlier, she had found herself in jail, for the crimes of the man who said was in love with her. Like everyone else, he had let her down, and she had found herself locked up and pregnant. Though she was locked up, her situation now was different, and somehow even worse; in jail, she knew how long she would have to stay there. Here, in a land whose rules she ignored, she didn’t know when the Queen would release her, if she would release her at all. Another major difference was that none of Killian or her had given up on the other, they had been separated against their will; Killian had not let her down. On the contrary, he had done everything he could to protect her, even asking the Queen to spare her and make him pay instead. Lying on the stone floor, she cried silently during long hours.

Emma suddenly got up and looked through the window. Memories of a dream she had during the night had come back to her: she was looking at the ocean, and a ship had appeared on the horizon. Not any ship: the Jewel of the Realm; Killian had found her. But it had only been a dream; Emma could see nothing but the ocean and the sky, there was no ship to be spotted. ‘It can also make your dreams come true,’ this was what he had told her; maybe she should just hope that he would find her. Of course it didn’t sound likely to her, but she pretended to believe.

The next days were mostly spent losing herself in her thoughts. It often ended in tears, but at least time was passing by faster than if she was just waiting. There were times when she tried to use magic to free herself from the handcuffs, but she simply didn’t know how to. And sometimes, she stood up and looked through the windows, on the lookout for a ship, before sitting down again, following his advice and trying not to give up on hope. The only company she had was the black knight, coming everyday with a round loaf and some water; a man whose face was hidden behind a mask and who was dropping the food more than giving it to her. He never talked or showed any sign of compassion; it was fair to say that she was alone, in this tower.

Days went by slowly, very slowly. Emma didn’t remember any time in her life when days had been so slow. She had been locked up for just a bit more than a week when she felt like it had been a month.

* * *

 

Looking through the window, finally she saw it: the Jewel of the Realm was in sight. But it didn’t stop; it went past the island and was now drawing away. When she wanted to scream, trying to signal her presence, Emma felt like she was choking. She saw the Queen standing by her side, her hand in her chest, this malevolent smirk on her lips.

“Can’t you see? He doesn’t care about you. He was peacefully living with his brother before you came into his life and got him into trouble. I made him a favor by locking you up here. He is free now. It took him only a few hours to get over you, and a few days to forget you. You love him but you are not loved in return. Did you really think he wouldn’t let you down, just like everyone else? Hope only leads to disappointment. After all these times, you should have known opening your heart to him was dangerous. But I can help you, you won’t make the mistake again after I’ve ripped it out of your chest.”

Emma screamed and woke up, immediately sitting up, her breathing fast, her hand on her chest. There was a second of relief as she felt her heart was still in its proper place. She then burst into tears as she thought of the words of the Queen, words reflecting what she was thinking deep down. Turning her feelings into anger, she shifted to the centre of the room, to the metal ring holding her captive, tying her to the floor. She grabbed the chain and pulled as hard as she could, trying to tear it. Since it didn’t work, she stood up and ran from one side of the room to the other, yanking the chain whenever she was stopped, tears flowing down her cheeks. Her thoughts were not clear anymore, being locked up in here without knowing how long she would have to stay was driving her crazy. She kept running across the room, pulling on the chain as strongly as she could, screaming as she gave into madness. All she wanted was to be free, but all she did was to hurt her wrists. There was nothing she could do; hitting the handcuffs against the metal ring or against each other didn’t work either. Tears didn’t stop until she felt like there was no tear left to be cried.

When she woke up the next morning, she remembered her dream: Killian was smiling at her, his fingers brushing her cheek, his eyes locked on hers. He was telling her everything was fine. He was wrong, but if sleeping was the only way to see him, she wanted to sleep more. She didn’t have the strength to fight against the chain, anyway.

Trying to sleep was how she spent the next days. She often woke up without any memories of her dreams, but sometimes it worked, and she could think of his bright blue eyes, his smile or his reassuring voice filled with tenderness until she would fall asleep again. But falling asleep was not so easy.

Sleeping any time of the day and the night, she lost track of time, she didn’t know which day it was, or how long she had been locked up; about two weeks, she thought, even if it felt more like two months. All she knew was that each day spent here was hell. There was no hope left. Killian would surely never find her; he was probably not even looking for her. Even if she regained freedom one day, what would she do? She had no place to go, nothing to do, no reason to live for. The Queen had been right, death would have been too easy; being locked up in this tower was much worse. If she had managed to rip her heart out, at least the pain would have lasted only a few seconds. She was tired of fighting. Emma stared at the round loaf the black knight had just dropped. This daily one piece of bread was not enough, she could feel she had weakened in the past few days. How long would she be able to survive if she stopped eating and drinking? Surely not many days. She grabbed the loaf and threw it out of the window, before lying down again, drowning in her tears.

Refusing to eat or drink anything, Emma spent most of the three next days lying on the floor. She felt weaker and weaker. It was raining and the cold wind was rushing into the tower. Shivering all night consumed some more of the few energy she had left. The next morning, she barely had enough strength to move. She was rolled into a ball, feeling dizzy. It felt like she was falling asleep when she passed out.

“Emma? Emma, love, you have to wake up.”

A faint smile made its way to her lips as she recognized his voice. She refused to open her eyes, afraid his voice might vanish if she did; the dream would end. His voice echoed again. It sounded more real than in any of her previous dreams, tempting her to wake up and check whether he was not here, but she resisted and listened carefully.

“Wake up and live. It’s been a long time but don’t surrender. I know you think hope only leads to disappointment, but please take a chance this time, take a chance on me. I am on my way, I am coming to save you. I only need time. Emma, I need you to survive, don’t surrender. This can’t end like this. Wake up, love. Wake up, eat, drink, breathe. Now it is my turn to tell you this: be patient. Wait for me. I am coming.”

Since the voice faded away, Emma opened her eyes and looked up. But apart from the firefly which zoomed out of the window and disappeared into the night, there was no one here. Lying on her back, she closed her eyes again, thinking of his words and trying to remember every feature of his voice. It was not the first time she was hearing him in her dreams, but it had never sounded so clear. The other difference was that he was usually telling her with a soft voice that everything was fine; this time, his voice imprinted with worry was making it more realistic, so realistic that she now had a doubt: had it really been a dream? She had no explanation, but this doubt was enough to clear her mind: what was she doing? What if he had not given up on her and really was on his way? The glimmer of hope was dim, but it was enough: she couldn’t surrender, maybe he only needed more time.

When the black knight came back, she pounced on the goblet of water before devouring the loaf. It required a few days before she regained the ability to move without feeling dizzy. She never heard his voice again, but was still clinging to the hope that he was somewhere out there, looking for her.

Sitting on the floor, Emma was looking down at her handcuffs. It had been days since she had not tried to use some magic. Focused, it was when she least expected it that the door behind her slammed open.

“Emma!”

Her heart skipped a beat. This time it was real. She barely had time to stand up and turn around when she found herself in a tight embrace.

“Killian!”

Her eyes closed, she bit her lip, trying to fight back the tears. The handcuffs didn’t allow her to wrap her arms around him, so she just let him squeeze her in his embrace, keeping her face in his neck. Though he was holding her so tight that she wondered how no rib had broken yet, she felt like in one moment he had fixed everything, as if all her broken pieces had been pulled back together.

“I was hoping you’d find me,” she said in a weak voice.

“There’s not a day that went by that I didn’t think of you. I was afraid I would never see you again.”

Emma didn’t have time to reply anything: she forgot everything when he pressed an open-mouthed kiss on her neck. Her lips parted and she tilted her head, stretching her neck where his lips lingered.

"Killian..."

He smiled against her skin before standing up straight. He had arrived in the room so fast that she hadn't got the time to see him. But when she did, her heart skipped another beat; he was even more handsome than in her memories. His blue eyes looked even brighter. Perhaps it was because of the black line circling them. This wasn't the only difference: his hair was now short, he was wearing a black stud on his ear, and he had traded his outfit for a red velvet vest and black leather.

"Killian? What happened?"

At this moment appeared in his eyes something which reminded her of herself, the night after climbing the beanstalk, when she had felt embarrassed as she had showed him the golden coins she had stolen from the giants, when she had been ashamed of her behaviour while his manners were so good.

"We need to go," he simply said, ignoring her question. He looked down at her handcuffs and that was when she saw it.

"Killian! What happened to your hand?"

Emma watched as the hook hit one of her handcuffs, skilfully enough to break the lock. He opened it and freed her left hand, before trying to free her second hand. It required a few attempts before the second handcuff broke free. As soon as she was released from them, she cupped his cheeks and looked him in the eyes.

"What happened?" she asked.

"I’ll tell you later, there is no time to explain now, the black knight could wake up anytime," he said, his hand covering hers on his cheek. "Let's get away from here."

His fingers closed on hers and he grabbed her hand before pulling her out of the room. Emma had indeed spent weeks at the top of the tower: on the landing were only some stairs leading down. Killian was still holding her hand, leading her as they ran down the spiral staircase. After all this time spent barely moving, running like this made her feel dizzy and she stumbled. By trying to hold herself up, she only managed to cut her palm with a stone of the wall.

“Stay with me, love,” said Killian, catching her right in time before she would hit the stone steps.

Still feeling dizzy, she lost herself in his eyes. She didn’t dislike how he had called her, ‘love,’ like in some of her dreams.

“Oh! Is this safe?” she asked; without any warning, he had scooped her up, and was now running down the stairs, even faster than when she was running behind him.

“Trust me.”

He sounded so confident, and also was so warm, that Emma didn’t complain. Her arms wrapped around his neck, she leant her head against his shoulder and let him carry her downstairs.

Killian stopped and put her down, indicating her to stay quiet while he listened carefully.

“The black knight seems to be back, stay here,” he whispered before going out, leaving her inside.

Leaning against the cool stone wall and not being in his arms anymore, she was cold again, even more than before it seemed; she had got used to the cold in her cell, but now that Killian had reminded her what it was like to be warm, she was shivering. The light coming through the ajar door let her think it was sunny, and probably warmer, outside. He had told her not to move, but curiosity got the best of her; quietly, she walked towards the door and peeked out. Eyes opened wide as she saw Killian in a sword-fighting with the black knight. It didn’t take her long to realize she didn’t need to worry about him; he was skilfully avoiding every attempt of the black knight to hurt him. Soon, he firmly pinned him against the wall, his sword against his throat.

“You didn’t get enough the first time?” Killian asked menacingly.

Emma had never seen him like this. She couldn’t see his eyes, but she could hear the violence tinting his words and could see how he was frowning, or how his jaw was clenched. Killian threw the black knight’s mask away and hit him hard in the head with his hook. The man fell on the ground, knocked out.

Killian’s expression switched when he saw Emma staring at him: all the traces of violence disappeared, his look changed; he now looked worried.

“You’ve watched this?”

By the tone of his voice, there was definitely something worrying him. Emma didn’t reply. She was staring at him, both admiring his skills in sword-fighting and being surprised by the violence she had just witnessed. The man standing in front of her looked like the Killian she remembered, but was at the same time so different. Slowly, he walked closer to her.

“I didn’t mean to let you see that, not so early, not before I had time to explain. Emma, I may have changed, but you don’t have to worry, I will never hurt you.”

She lightly frowned as she processed what he had just said. “Worry? But I’m not worried,” she said, glancing at the man on the floor. “Killian, what you’ve done… Back in my world, that’s what we call legitimate defense. He wouldn’t have hesitated. All you did was protecting us.”

Killian’s features softened and he flashed her a smile, while closing the distance between them. “We should go. Give me your hand.”

Emma held out her hand, thinking he just wanted to pull her away from this tower. But he looked up at her.

“The other one,” he said. Emma didn’t move and kept staring at him, wondering what he wanted. Since the moment when she had stumbled in the stairs, she had kept her fist clenched, trying to stop the cut from bleeding. “It’s cut. Let me help you.”

“Oh, no, it’s fine,” she said, hiding her hand in her back.

“No, it’s not. After all these efforts to find you, I’d be grateful if you could avoid bleeding to death. Give me your hand.”

“Killian, we don’t have time, what if he wakes up?” she asked, indicating the black knight.

“I would say he’s knocked out for a while.”

Since he was insisting, Emma sighed and held out her bloody hand which he grabbed with his hook; it was bleeding more than she had expected. Killian uncorked a bottle and poured some liquid on the wound.

“Ow! What is that?”

“It’s rum.”

“Rum? Why do you carry some with you? I thought rum was leading to bad form and…”

Emma stopped in mid-sentence, losing her words as she saw him; Killian had wrapped her hand in a scarf, and was now tying it up, holding an end in his hand and the other one between his teeth, his eyes locked on hers. She blinked, but it didn’t help keep her ideas clear. Finally, he stood up straight, finishing to arrange the scarf around her hand.

“Rum can indeed lead to bad form, but things have changed, love. Lately, I’ve realized good form was not leading anywhere, not when I’m not with you. To get what you want, you have to fight, and good manners will make you lose.”

Emma stared at him again; things had indeed changed, the Killian she knew would never have said this. She was distracted from her thoughts when he scooped her up again. It took him a few minutes to walk down the path and reach the oceanfront, where the Jewel of the Realm was waiting. Or at least that was what she was thinking.

“This is another change: welcome aboard the Jolly Roger, Emma,” he said while getting on board. He kept her in his arms as he addressed his crew. “All hands on deck! We’re leaving now! Smee!”

While the other sailors were active to set sail, a short and plump man in a red hat came to them.

“Go down to the galley, and bring some food and water to my quarters.”

“Aye, captain.”

Captain? Quirking her eyebrows, Emma looked up at Killian.


	9. The Captain's Tale

“Killian, where is your brother?” asked Emma as Killian was carrying her below deck.

“Recovering. He will be fine, eventually. For now, it’s about you I’m worried. Do you realize how cold you are?”

“It was cold in the tower, but I’m feeling better, now.”

“You’re still cold.” Killian put her down on the bed and a shiver ran through her body as she couldn’t feel his warmth anymore. “I should have thought of giving you this earlier.”

He removed his coat and put it on her shoulders, before pulling the desk closer to the bed. He then disappeared in the captain’s bathroom for a few seconds before coming back to sit next to her, his hand rubbing her arm in an attempt to warm her up. Emma blushed as she thought of telling him how warmer than his coat he was, but she didn’t dare to say anything. Smee came back with a large bowl of some sort of rice-based soup and a mug of water.

“Will that be enough, captain?”

“If it’s not, I’ll call you again.” Killian dismissed the sailor and turned to Emma. “The choice is quite limited, but you can eat as much as you want. You also have water here.”

“Thanks,” she said, taking the mug of water.

He flashed her a smile, staying close to her. She started to eat while feeling his gaze on her. It was slightly intimidating, but she had missed him so much that she didn’t want him to stop.

“Emma, one of the things that has changed is that the cabin in which you were staying is now taken by my brother. The captain’s quarters are now yours, but it won’t be as quiet as where you were; there will be times when I need to be here. If it bothers you, Liam can come here and you can go back there.”

“Killian, I’ve spent weeks sleeping on a stone floor. Whatever you can offer me will be better than what I had lately.” She tilted her head, leaning against his hand as he brushed her cheek with the back of his fingers. “What happened to Liam?”

“Got hit by a curse. But he will be fine, he’s been healed, he just needs time to recover. I’ll be right back.” Again, he went to the bathroom and came back a few seconds later. Another shiver had time to run through her body. “Among the different ways I know to warm you up, one of them is a hot bath. If you’re interested, there is one ready for you.”

“You ran a bath for me?”

“Aye. I can’t let you freeze. I thought that was the most honourable way to warm you up,” he said with a smirk.

While she was in the bathroom, Killian stayed behind the door, making sure she was alright whenever there was silence for more than a few minutes, or when there were sounds such as the one caused by her elbow bumping the bathtub. He was obviously worried; Emma guessed it was because she probably looked weak. And she was; the relief of being back on the ship had let her feel how exhausted she was, making all her worries vanish. Or at least most of them, since she still had to find a way to go back where she belonged, in Boston. But she would think of this later.

When she came back to the quarters and saw him standing in front of his desk, looking up at her, his finger still on the map he had been studying, she remembered of all these times in this tower when there had been only one thing she had wanted to do. Now, there was nothing holding her back; she closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around him, holding herself against him, her face in the crook of his neck, her eyes closed. She smiled as his arms were not long to tightly wrap around her. Killian didn’t need any explanation and simply hugged her back. He didn’t pull back but she didn’t either, and they stayed there for a moment. When his embrace had soothed her so much that she felt her eyelids grow heavy, she looked up into his eyes.

“Is there anything else that you need?” he asked.

“Other than some sleep, nope. You gave me everything I needed.” She kissed his cheek and pulled out from him. “Good night.”

Exhausted, Emma fell asleep right after lying down. Killian softly brushed her cheek before going out of the quarters. He was on deck the next morning when she found him. Holding the railing of the ship, he was looking at the ocean stretching ahead of them. Seeing him from behind, Emma gulped before going to stand next to him. A smile tugged at his lips.

“You’re alright, Swan?” he asked, glancing at her before focusing back on the ocean.

“Yes,” she replied, examining him before following his eyes. She was seeing nothing but water. “What are you looking at?”

“The horizon. I find it calming, it helps me think.” He shook his head and looked at her. “Is there anything that you need?”

“No, I just came because… I wanted to thank you, Killian. For coming back for me. If you hadn’t…”

“That was the right thing to do,” he replied, still focused on the horizon.

She imitated him, holding the railing and looking at the ocean as she looked for her words.

“You’ve done so much for me, while expecting nothing in return. The day we met, you postponed your departure to help me, telling me it wouldn’t cause any problem though you knew it would. I…” Emma kept staring at the ocean as she talked, unwilling to take the risk of catching his eyes and losing her words. “I’m not used to someone putting me first. In my life, people were always letting me down. No one has ever fought for me the way you did.”

Killian turned to her and cupped her chin, making her look up at him.

“Emma, I don’t intend to let you down. Saving you was the right thing to do, but it was also, and especially, what I _wanted_ to do. Don’t you know? When you came into my life, everything changed. You changed the way I am looking at the world, and it is so much more colourful now.”

Feeling the intensity of his stare, Emma got lost in his eyes. Killian was also close to lose himself in hers, but he managed to focus back on what he was saying. He kept his eyes locked on hers while he talked.

“Have you ever met someone that you would change your entire world for? Someone whose eyes you just knew you were born to gaze into? From the moment we met, I knew. Your beauty struck me the first time when I saw you. This was before another kind of beauty, the one that comes from the inside, even more powerful and enchanting, made me attached to you in a way I’ve never even thought was possible. And now that I know what it is like to have you by my side, life without you would be meaningless. You are a part of my life I don’t want to live without.”

Not taking her eyes off of him, her lips parted and her vision became blurred with tears as she heard his words. She tried to breathe in but there didn’t seem to be enough air anymore. Air was not what she wanted, anyway. It was not what she needed. Slowly, she came closer, until her forehead was against his. He seemed to guess what her intentions were; his lips captured hers, his mouth closing in on her top lip. A tear silently rolled down her cheek while the softness of the kiss consumed her; like when their lips had met for the first time, she felt like a fire was burning inside her. Keeping their lips locked, he crossed his arms in her lower back to pull her closer, while her fingers went through his hair and closed in on some raven strands.

Out of breath, she kept her forehead and nose against his, her fingers still in his hair, not letting him pull away. He had loosened his embrace, hesitant to hold her against him, not because he didn’t want to keep her close, but because he wanted her to know she was free to go if she wanted to. But she didn’t. He opened his eyes.

“You’re not running away, this time?” he asked, letting her feel his breath against her lips.

She shook her head, opening her eyes in her turn. “You still haven’t told me how you found me.”

“Are you sure you want to hear that?”

“Why not?” she asked, noticing the reluctance in his voice.

“It might be a long and not so interesting story.”

“Tell me. What happened?”

“Come here,” he said, stepping over the railing and sitting down, inviting her to do the same. “Smee!”

While she sat down next to him, Emma didn’t hear what Killian had asked the sailor. Soon, the man with the red hat came back with a box containing objects she wasn’t sure she could identify. The captain took one of them and, with his hook, drilled a hole in the shell.

“Coconut milk?” he asked, handing her the coconut.

“Thanks,” she said, dubious. Her tone made Killian chuckle.

“I’ve told you it might be a bit long to explain, we may as well make ourselves comfortable, and drink to the fact that you’re back on board,” he said, locking his eyes on hers while hitting a second coconut on hers. “Rum would do as well, but asking a lady to drink is not good form, I wouldn’t want to bring you to the dark side.”

His teasing tone made her smile. “I was the one stealing from the giants, and now I’m the one with good manners?”

“Aye, it seems like it.” With his hook, he brushed a blonde curl behind her ear. “I think you asked me to tell you how I’ve found you, here’s the story. When you’ve been taken away from me, I could have gone back to the man I used to be, but it didn’t work, I just couldn’t. It took me some time to be able to think again, to realize I had lost you. It was like I wasn’t myself anymore, as if a part of me was missing.”

Killian paused, looking at the horizon, his jaw clenched as he was thinking again of this moment. Emma looked at the horizon as well, remembering how she had also needed time before she had stopped staring blankly at whatever was in front of her.

“Luckily, I had Liam,” Killian continued. “He tried to reason with me, but I wouldn’t listen to anything he had to say. His sense of duty allowed him to agree with me on one point: you had saved all of us and the ship by accepting the Evil Queen’s bloody offer, it was now our turn to save you. After what she had done, there was no way we could keep working for her. From sailors working for the Queen, we became pirates. We didn’t know where she had taken you, but we decided to start by searching her castle. It took us thirteen long days to go back to the Enchanted Forest, to a village close to the castle. But it was better guarded than what we had expected, and we lost a couple days elaborating a plan to enter. Only Liam and I went, otherwise we would have caught their attention. We searched the castle but you were not there. Good thing is we didn’t enter the castle for nothing; I managed to know where you were kept.”

Killian paused, staring at the horizon again. Emma felt like there was something he was holding back. “What is there that you’re not telling me?”

He looked at her, allowing her to see the regret and even the shame in his eyes. “Things have changed, love. I’ve changed. What happened there, it was ugly.”

“Did you kill someone?”

“No. But I almost did. It is only under the threat of death that the black knight revealed where you were kept. You saw what I’ve done to this man at the foot of the tower.”

“Killian, what I saw… it was only legitimate defense.” She didn’t know what else to say. She could only see how he had changed and how uncomfortable he was with this; now she knew why he had seemed reluctant to tell her this story. “What happened next?”

“It wasn’t as simple as I had expected. Some black knights must have warned the Evil Queen. We were about to leave when she caught us. She cast at Liam something which looked like dark magic. With the shock, he fell down. She tried to curse me the same way, but I’ve avoided it. She started sending some fireballs, which I also avoided. She was so focused on me that she didn’t see Liam was on his feet again. He knocked her out with a candelabrum and we ran away. We were halfway between the castle and the village when Liam collapsed. I called for help, but there was no one. This was when I saw the black marks on his right arm. The Evil Queen had indeed used dark magic on him, and it was spreading: the marks were covering his arm when he collapsed, and were starting to spread across his chest by the time I arrived in the village. When seeing me carrying my brother, the inhabitants quickly led me to the doctor of the village. But he couldn’t help me. He told me wounds inflicted by magic could be healed only by magic. All he was able to say was that, when the black marks would reach his heart, it would be too late. This was when I remembered of this man you had talked about, the one who is said to have the most powerful magic, the Dark One.”

“You found the Dark One?” Emma asked, suddenly remembering everything she had read about this man she had intended to find.

“Aye, I did.”

The memories of him were enough to make Killian frown. He remembered screaming in the street. “Isn’t there anyone who can help? I need to see the Dark One! Where is he?”

All the inhabitants around had looked clueless. Then, he had heard a man right behind him. “There is no need to scream, dearie. Rumplestitskin,” he had said, bowing as he had introduced himself.

“I found him,” said Killian, coming back to the present time. “Or perhaps I should say he found me. The man is the strangest man I’ve ever met. I am actually not even sure he is a man. His skin is more like one of a crocodile. When he saw the black marks, he had this maniacal laughter and made the three of us disappear in a puff of red smoke to bring us to his mansion. He had all kinds of potions stored in a cupboard and took some of them. I didn’t follow what he did exactly, but the black marks disappeared and Liam finally woke up. He said the Evil Queen had used something called dreamshade, a venom found only in Neverland; she used on him what we had brought back from there, what the King had asked us to find. The Dark One said Liam would be fine, but that he would need time to recover.”

Killian paused, taking a sip of coconut juice and glancing at Emma. While he had been gazing at the horizon, she had stared at him, listening to his story, realizing he had been through even more than she had expected, just for her.

“The crocodile was expecting us to leave,” Killian went on, “but after seeing what he was able to do, I couldn’t leave without asking him about you. I told him how you had been taken away from me. I knew where you were kept, but I didn’t know anything else. I needed to see you. Of course, he wouldn’t help me for free. I had already given him all the jewels I had stolen at the castle so that he would accept to save Liam. It was only when I gave him a very ancient jewel, which used to belong to my mother, that he took out of his cupboard a crystal ball. This was when I saw you, lying on the floor, rolled into a ball whereas it was the middle of the day. My love, I was so worried. I wasn’t even sure you were still alive.”

Realizing that while she had surrendered, completely giving up on hope, he had never stopped looking for her and had been worried when he had seen her, Emma nestled against him, finding no word. Dropping his coconut, he slipped an arm in her back as soon as he felt her come closer, placing his hand on her waist. He went on with his story. He perfectly remembered how worried he was and how he had asked the Dark One whether he could send him there directly. But the man had let out a creepy laugh.

“This would be too easy,” he had said. “I enjoy watching you all running after your dreams. Sending you to the tower would deprive me of my entertainment.”

“It is Emma we’re talking about!” Killian had thumped the table, looking daggers at the man. “Her life is in danger and all you care about is your bloody entertainment! One more day could be enough to lose her forever.”

Rumplestitskin had laughed again, causing Killian to clench his jaw even more. “All magic comes with a price, dearie. It would cost me too much energy to send you there.”

“She won’t survive!”

“She will. The prophecy has not come true yet.”

“What prophecy?” had asked Killian, slightly calmed down.

“The one she talked about when she came to find you, of course. The one saying you’re the one who will give her what she’s looking for, the one I’ve written.”

“He wrote the prophecy? Why?” asked Emma.

“Aye, that’s what he said, and I also asked why,” said Killian. Like Emma, he had been intrigued by this prophecy and had asked the man the same question. “You wrote that? Why?”

There had been another maniacal laughter. “Shouldn’t you be on your way to Emma?”

“Please, help me save her.”

Killian had been very tempted to slap him when he had laughed again. “A pirate captain begging me, I like this. I won’t send you there, but I will give you this.”

“What is that?” he had asked, looking at the little box the crocodile had given him.

“Just talk to it and it will send her your message.”

Killian had been about to ask more questions about how it worked, but Rumplestitskin had decided he had spent enough time with the pirates; Killian had found himself back on the Jolly Roger with Liam.

“Once Liam was safe in the lieutenant’s cabin and the Jolly Roger had set sail, heading to this island in the Bottomless Sea where I knew you were kept,” Killian said, “I opened the little box the crocodile had given me. This image of you rolled into a ball on the floor was haunting me, you looked so weak. I knew what I wanted to tell you. I knew that, after seventeen days locked alone in this tower, you were likely to have lost hope. I only wanted you to know I was coming for you, I only needed you to wake up and survive, to understand that I only needed time, because I was still so far away from you. I knew I wanted to tell you all these things, but I didn’t know how it worked. The crocodile had told me to talk to it, so that’s what I’ve done, because I had to try. But I was feeling like he had made a fool of me: how was this firefly supposed to record my message and find you?”

Emma straightened up, her eyes locked on him. “Wait, the firefly? It was you?”

“Did it actually find you?”

“Yes. I saw one, once, when waking up from a dream. Well, I thought it was a dream. I knew it sounded more realistic than usual. It was a dream about you, I’ve heard your voice telling me to wake up and live, to be patient and give you time to come to me, to take a chance on you.”

“It sounds like you did receive it.”

“I did. And, Killian… This message you sent me, it was all I needed, it saved me.” She looked down. Now that she knew everything he had been through for her, she was ashamed that she had thought he had forgot her and gone back to his previous life. She grabbed his hand on her waist and distractedly played with his fingers, still looking down as she talked. “Being locked up there, not knowing if I’d ever be free again… As days passed, I lost hope. I thought you were not even trying to find me. I lost hope to the point that I surrendered. I stopped eating and drinking because I didn’t want to live anymore. But when I’ve heard your voice, I had doubts about it being only a dream, and it was enough to make me realize surrendering was a mistake. This message gave me hope that you would come back for me, and I’ve started to eat and drink again. I was so weak, it took me almost a week to get better and be able to move without feeling like I was about to pass out. I then did my best not to lose hope again, to be patient as your voice had told me, until you found me. I shouldn’t have lost hope in the first place, I should have trusted you.”

Emma bit her lip, not looking up. It was only when Killian’s fingers closed on hers that she realized she had been playing with them all this time. But she didn’t take her hand away, and let him pull her closer.

“Emma, you can’t blame yourself for that. When I sent the message, I knew you were likely to feel like this. These twenty-six days away from you have been hell, being without you made time go by so slowly. But it’s in the past, it’s all right now. And in case you ever find yourself in a similar situation again, just know this: I will never stop looking for you, unless you tell me to.” Keeping her hand in his, he traced small circles on the back of her hand with his thumb, and leant to press a kiss on her forehead. A teasing smile tugged at his lips. “You mentioned dreams. Did you often dream of me?”

Emma felt the warmth of the blush covering her cheeks. She looked up, biting her lip, repressing a smile. “How much is often?”

Killian flashed her a bright smile before whispering in her ear. “I am not ashamed to admit you were in my dreams every night.”

This only made her cheeks heat up even more. She drowned in his bright blue eyes before glancing down at his lips. Slowly, the distance between them decreased. Emma’s eyes closed and her lips parted, and…

“Captain, sorry to interrupt, we need your view about something.”

“You’re sorry?” Obviously annoyed, Killian glared at the sailor. His features immediately softened and his eyes were filled with tenderness when he turned to Emma. “I’ll be back whenever I can.”

The captain pressed a kiss on her cheek and followed his sailor.


	10. Still the Same

Staying on the railing, a soft sigh left Emma as her eyes followed Killian. Something had not changed since her first days on board: how easy it was to give in to him when he was around. But she was not regretting anything at the moment. It was trying to pull away from him which had brought her nothing but regrets; she may as well enjoy the days she had left on board.

Since the captain looked busy and wasn’t coming back, Emma decided it was time to go back to the books. She had yet to find a solution to travel across the realms. On her way down to the quarters, she hesitated, standing in front of the lieutenant’s cabin. Softly, she knocked on the door and heard a weak voice. She wasn’t sure about what he had said, but she entered.

“Miss Swan, it is nice to see you again.”

Exhaustion could be seen on his features and heard in his voice. Even smiling seemed to require much effort. Emma smiled back before pulling out the chair and sitting next to the bed.

“I went past the door, I thought I could pay you a visit. I hope it’s not a problem?”

“Of course it’s not. You did well. As I said, it is nice to see you again.”

“Killian found me, he brought me back. But you probably already know about this.”

Chuckling made him cough. “Indeed, I know. News tend to spread fast, aboard.”

At this moment, Emma wondered just how much he knew. Whenever she was with Killian on deck, she was forgetting they were not just the two of them, she was not paying attention to the sailors seeing them. A soft blush covered her cheeks.

“How are you feeling?” she said, changing the subject.

“Better than yesterday,” he replied with a weak smile.

“I’m sorry, this is all because of me.”

“Miss Swan, we already discussed this. I stand my ground. I would do anything for my brother, and Killian can be stubborn when he has an idea in mind. These past weeks, his only idea has been to find you. He’s the one who wanted to go to the Queen’s castle. Don’t blame yourself.”

“He wouldn’t have been to her castle if it wasn’t for me.”

“And if it wasn’t for you, he wouldn’t have known about the Dark One. Thank you for this.”

“Sounds like you won’t admit it is all my fault.”

“Indeed,” he said with a smile.

“Killian isn’t the only one to be stubborn. Must run in the family.”

“Aye, you may be right.” Amusement was visible on his face. At this moment, something in his features reminded her of Killian. “But on that one, my brother agrees with me: he will never blame you for what happened.”

“Alright then, I’ll do it myself.”

“Miss Swan, believe me when I say there is no need for you to blame yourself.”

Emma didn’t know what else to say. She gave him a soft smile. “I will try. I should go now, you look like you need some rest.”

“Thank you for coming.”

* * *

 

Emma looked up when Killian came back to his quarters. She saw his bright smile fading as his eyes were locked on the book she was reading.

“Are you still trying to find a way to go back to your realm?” he asked with a hint of disappointment in his voice.

“Yes, why would I stop?”

Killian searched her eyes before replying. “Perhaps I was hoping you felt as I did.”

“In this other realm, I have a place to live, a job.”

“But think of what you could have here.”

Emma closed her book and stood up to softly cup his cheek. “Killian, it has never been in my plans to stay here, Boston is where I belong.”

“Plans can be changed,” he said, desperately trying to make her change her mind.

She bit her lip, looking into his eyes, her hand still on his cheek. “You knew I was here only for a limited time. Remember what you told me about shooting stars being ephemeral.”

Killian looked down. Usually getting lost in his eyes, Emma was then able to focus on his other features. Not finding anything to say to soothe his obvious sadness, she slowly trailed her fingers along his jawline, her thumb brushing his lips. Finally looking up, Killian tilted his head and pressed a soft kiss on her palm. Still not finding any word, she closed the distance and nestled against him, her face in the crook of his neck.

“I don’t want you to miss me when I’m gone,” she said in a low voice.

“How could I not miss you?”

Emma tightened her arms around him and stayed in his embrace. What had she done? Since the beginning, she had been aware letting her walls down was dangerous, she had known she could be hurt. But she had still taken the risk. What she had not expected was that he could be hurt in the process as well. She had not thought he could grow attached to her the way she was attached to him. She let out a sigh.

"Where is the ship going?" she asked, still in his arms.

"Where it was supposed to go. The Evil Queen had initially sent us to look for some flower which gleams and glows. All I know is that it is precious and she wants it. She won’t get it, we’ll take it first."

“Can you take me to the Dark One? Maybe he will know how to travel between realms." She was hesitant, wondering if he would help her go back home while he was clearly not willing to let her go. Once again, he proved to be perceptive; breaking the embrace, he cupped her chin to look her in the eyes.

"Emma, the fact I don't want to lose you doesn't mean I won't support and help you in your choices, whatever this choice is. I will take you to the Dark One if it is what you want. Right now, we're closer to this flower than to the Enchanted Forest. Would you accept if we go and find him only after finding this flower? It would make you stay a few more days."

"I don't mind staying a bit longer," she said, her smile immediately reflected on his features.

* * *

 

Emma spent most of her day reading. She was not reading about the Dark One anymore, but about something else which might be helpful.

"Where is Killian?" she asked the man with the red hat, not finding the captain on deck.

Smee seemed surprised he was addressed, but still replied. "In one of the crew's cabins, the one at the end of the corridor. But now is not a time to go and see him, he's sleeping."

Emma felt embarrassed as she realized that, once again because of her, he had to use one of these bunks in the cabin where he had hidden her from the Black Navy. Considering their reaction when she had been announced as a guest on board, and still seeing no sign of kindness coming from any of them, Emma had never tried to talk with the sailors and had learned to ignore them; without Killian on deck, she had no reason to stay and went back to the quarters. She would wait for him there. The night was falling. It became difficult to focus on what she was reading, her eyelids grew heavy.

Everything was dark, warm, and seemed to be moving. Emma found the strength to open her eyes.

“Killian?”

“Shh, don’t worry, love, you can sleep.”

Looking up at him, Emma tried to reach for his cheek but only managed to brush his jawline with her fingertips.

“My handsome captain,” she said in a dreamy voice.

She heard a chuckle and the warmth went away as she felt something flat and not so comfortable under her back. The last thing she remembered was something warm touching her cheek.

* * *

 

Emma could feel summer was drawing to an end: even for an early morning, it was quite cold. Killian was back on deck, behind the wheel. He flashed her a smile when he spotted her.

"Can I talk to you about something I've read?"

"Of course, love. Smee! Take the wheel."

The sailor came and replaced Killian, who led Emma to their spot on the railing.

“How are you so warm when it’s so cold?” she asked once they had sat down, feeling his warmth on one side.

Killian smirked and looked at her with an eyebrow raised, shifting even closer and tossing an arm in her back. “If you want me to hold my body against yours, you just need to ask. There’s no need to use cold as an excuse.”

Emma felt her cheeks heat up; she had not expected this at all. She used the same teasing tone as him as she replied. “You couldn’t handle it.”

“Perhaps you’re the one who couldn’t handle it. The offer still remains, I’m your handsome captain after all.” Her look of surprise made him laugh. “You used these words yourself.”

“No, I didn’t,” she instantly denied, which seem to amuse him even more.

“Aye, you did. Yesterday night, when you were in my arms as I carried you to bed.”

Suddenly, Emma remembered looking up at him and trying to reach for his cheek before saying something; realizing he was right made her cheeks burn and she buried her face in his neck.

“Just so you know, you don’t need to hide,” he said, still amused. “I have quite a fancy for this blush covering your cheeks.”

“Killian…” She was almost whining now and he laughed, while her face was still in his neck. “What happened to you? Why are you so teasing today?”

“I don’t know, I guess I’m just happy to be with you.”

These words were enough to bring back this inner struggle; having someone whose face brightened with a smile at the simple sight of her was nice, but she hated to think of how hurt he would be when she would leave. Since she didn’t say anything, Killian went on.

“Didn’t you want to talk to me about something you’ve read?”

“Oh, yes.” She lifted her head up to catch his eye. “I’ve read something about a place in the Enchanted Forest. It is a lake, Lake Nostos. It is said in the book that the waters of this lake have healing properties. Things can be restored to their former glory. Maybe it could make the bean magic again?”

“Healing properties? You’re bloody brilliant,” he said, looking proud of her. “After we find this flower which gleams and glows, we can go to this lake.”

“Before going there, can we stop by the Dark One’s mansion?”

“Why? You found a solution, we don’t need him.”

“I still have questions to ask him. I want to know more about this prophecy.”

“Alright. But I must warn you: he is very strange. The least I see this crocodile, the better. I think he can even be dangerous.” Killian tilted his head and suddenly got up. “Come with me.”

“Where are we going?”

“I’ve just thought of something.”

“Captain!” called Smee as he saw them leaving their spot. “How long am I supposed to stay here?”

“Until I tell you to go, Mr Smee. You’re doing very well, keep the wheel for now.”

“But I’m supposed to be off-duty,” he said, not loud enough for Killian to hear him.

Emma followed him below deck. She didn’t remember where the door he was unlocking led.

“I don’t know if I’ve taken you here when I made you visit the ship on the first day,” he said, opening the door. “This is the armoury.”

“Why are we here?” she asked, looking at all the swords and daggers stored there.

“I’m going to teach you how to fight.” He examined the different swords before picking one. “This one should do.”

“Are you sure this is a good idea?”

“Aye. Life on the ocean has not been so peaceful lately. I’ll be reassured if I know you’re able to handle a sword to defend yourself,” he said, coming back to her with the sword he had picked. “Can you unbuckle your belt?”

“Unbuckle my…?”

“What are you imagining, love?” he asked with a smirk as he saw the look on her face. “It’s just so that I can equip you properly.”

Complying, Emma let him pass her belt in the sheath and buckled it again.

“I don’t think I can do this.”

“This is what you said before climbing the beanstalk, and you managed very well.” Killian cupped her chin and let her feel the intensity of his stare. “I am not even sure I have much to teach you, I saw how you used this sword to trap the giant at the top of the beanstalk. Your vision of yourself doesn’t seem accurate. When will you realize the extent of your abilities? You are able to do so much, Emma. I have yet to see you fail.”

Emma had no word. She was thinking he was the one with an inaccurate vision of her. She watched him going to search through a chest.

“Take this, it will protect your hands,” he said, handing her a pair of greyish leather gloves which went up to her elbows.

They went back on deck. She was examining the golden hilt of her sword when she felt him standing behind her.

“The first step in sword-fighting should be utterly easy for you, your move when we were at the top of the beanstalk was perfect. The first thing you have to do is to unsheathe the sword. If you don’t execute the move accurately, you lose time, and time during a fight is precious,” he explained, looking at her over her shoulder. “Before a fight, you have to make sure your sword is on the side opposite to the hand you use, because it will be much easier this way. I took it you would use your right hand, because that’s what you did the first time, am I right?”

“Yes,” she said, surprised he had remembered such a detail. He was so close that she could feel his breath against her cheek as he talked.

“You don’t only need to pull it out of its sheath, you also need to orient the blade towards the opponent. For your move to be effective, you have to be smooth and not to break it up in several steps. Let me show you.” Killian crossed his arm over her stomach and his hand covered hers on the hilt of her sword. Without warning her, he quickly and smoothly unsheathed it, before putting it back. “This is what it should look like. Now, I’ll show you again, slowly. Try to remember the feeling, feel it in every muscle of your arm.”

Slowly, he performed the same move, unsheathing the sword and orienting the blade forward. “Now, in this position, you’re ready to parry or engage, to do whatever you need to do to win the fight. Did you feel it?”

“Yes, I think I did.”

Again, he sheathed her sword. He was so close that she didn’t resist and leant back against him, tilting her head on the side, her nose brushing his cheek. Her eyes had closed at the sound of his voice, and now, his scent was intoxicating her. For a moment, none of them moved. Killian then tilted his head and pecked her lips, before stepping aside.

“Do it on your own, now. Show me.”

Looking down at her hand on the hilt of her sword, Emma unsheathed, trying to reproduce the move Killian had showed her. As soon as she had finished, she looked at Killian, wondering if she had done it right. He beamed at her.

“I told you that you could do it. Since you seem to be good at it, we’ll just go with your instinct for now. I will be your opponent, you will have to try and disarm me. You don’t have to worry, I’ll move slowly at first. Just one thing before we start: think defence before thinking attack, this is what’ll keep you safe in a real fight. Get ready!”

Killian unsheathed his sword and she did the same, holding hers in front of her in a defensive way, both her hands on the hilt. He stepped forward and, slowly, engaged. Easily, her sword stopped his.

“Well done, love.”

She stopped a second blow, and a third one, but since he was moving forward, she had to step back, and stumbled. Instantly sheathing his sword, he held out his hand.

“Are you alright?”

“Yes,” she said, taking his hand and standing up. “Can we try again?”

“Of course. But first let me tell you this: it was good, but it could be even better if you relaxed. Your muscles are too tense, you cannot act with speed like this. This is maybe what made you fall, your legs were too tense to obey you.” He came to her and placed his hand on her shoulder. His hand trailed down her arm. “Loosen your muscles, love. This is how you have to keep your elbows: bent, and close to your body.”

He reached for her hand, his fingers massaging her palm while his thumb brushed the back of her hand. His hand then reached for her hip and trailed down the upper part of her thigh. It worked, since Emma felt the muscles of her arm and leg but also of all her body loosen.

They tried again, Killian executed the same moves and, this time, Emma didn’t stumble. She kept stopping the blows, stepping back as he kept moving forward. But soon, the mast stopped her and Killian smiled, standing right in front of her, their swords still against each other.

“You did very well, love. Your only mistake is that you let me pin you against the mast. This is very important: don’t focus only on your opponent. Even if he happens to be your handsome captain,” he added on a teasing tone. He became serious again. “You have to focus not only on the one standing in front of you, but on everything else which is around you, so that you can avoid being trapped like this, and even possibly trap the opponent.”

Pinned against the mast, Emma was staring at him, listening carefully. He was so close that the blades were only a few inches from her.

“Being smooth, relaxing, and being aware of what’s around,” she recited.

“That’s it,” he said with a proud smile. “Do you want to try again?”

Emma nodded and they positioned themselves again on deck. She had been attentive enough the previous time; instead of waiting for him to attack, she struck first, trying to use the same moves as him. It was not as efficient, but after a few blows, she finally made him step back. A smile brightened his face.

“I always knew there was a little pirate in you. Some more training won’t hurt, but you have it in you, love.”

Emma smiled back, unable to resist the tenderness and the pride sparkling in his eyes.

“We should stop for now, to end on something good for today. We can do it again later, if you want to.”

* * *

 

In the evening, Emma was reading in the quarters. This time, it wasn’t a book about magic, but about astronomy; during this night they had been stargazing, she had realized she knew nothing about the stars. She had been fascinated by everything Killian had told her, and wanted to know more. The knock on the door made her look up.

“Dinner time!” announced Killian. “I have a little time before going back on deck, may I have dinner with you?”

“Of course.”

The words had come out instantly. Between evenings when he had been on deck and days when she had been pulling away from him, the last time she had dined alone with him dated back to the first days when they had been together. Sitting opposite him, Emma was barely taking her eyes off of him while she ate. Her eyes then lowered to the piece of metal. Her hand reached across the table for it, and she distractedly trailed her fingers over the hook, instantly causing him to stop eating. She was thinking of what he had told him, when explaining her how he had found her in this tower.

“You still haven’t told me how you got that hook,” she said, looking up at him.

Staring at her fingers which were still trailing over his hook, it took Killian a few seconds before focusing on answering her. “It happened while we were searching the castle. Liam and I had taken separate ways, to increase our chance to find you. One of the black knights I had to face saw I was holding something, and decided he wanted it. I refused to give him, of course. I had underestimated his skills in sword-fighting. Also, his sword was enchanted. A sword normally doesn’t go through flesh and bones so easily. This is how I lost my hand, and replaced it with this hook who was there. He was faster to grab what I had been clutching in my hand, but I took it back. It was this, I had found it in your cabin.”

Killian searched through his pocket and pulled out of it something Emma recognized at once.

“Killian… This is just a necklace.” Emma was staring at her swan necklace in his hand, biting her lip, wishing he had just let the black knight have it. “It was not worth…”

“It was the only thing I had from you,” he said, as if it was a reason good enough. “I didn’t have the occasion to give it back to you. You can have it back now.”

She kept biting her lip, feeling sorry he had thought this necklace was worth his hand. “You can keep it, I don’t want this anymore. The only reason why I kept it was to remind myself not to trust anyone. But I trust you.”

Closing his fingers on the necklace and putting it back in his pocket, he raised an eyebrow. “Perhaps you shouldn’t.”

“But I do,” she said, disconcerted by his words. “With everything you’ve done for me, how could I not? I know I can trust you.”

“That’s a lot of faith you’re putting on me, Swan. Perhaps you could trust me before. And even then I’m not sure, I had told you I’d keep you safe, and I failed. I let the Evil Queen take you away. But now, it’s even worse, things have changed, I doubt I deserve your trust.”

“Killian, why are you saying this?” she asked, reaching for his hand.

Emma didn’t understand. Had she upset him by telling him the necklace was not worth? But she was looking into his eyes, and there seemed to be more than that; it wasn’t about the necklace. Did he really think he did not deserve her trust? He, who usually seemed so confident, looked now full of doubt. The thought she might not be the only one to face an inner struggle crossed her mind, a struggle he was only now allowing her to see. It was like he was torn between the lieutenant he was when she had first met him, and the pirate captain he was now. But by being so unsure, he reminded her of this exact man he was saying he was not anymore. The sadness in his eyes was too much, she couldn’t let him think like this: she stood up, skirted the table, and went to sit sideways on his lap, her eyes locked on his. His surprise didn’t stop his arms from wrapping around her waist.

“Killian, listen to me. You say everything has changed, but whether you’re the lieutenant or the captain, I know who you are. I know that, deep down,” she said, placing her hand on his chest, her fingertips slipping under the red velvet, “here, there is only one man. You may have changed, but you are still _you_. You are the lieutenant who helped me, you are the pirate captain who saved me, you are the man that I…” A soft smile tugged at her lips as the word simply wouldn’t come out. “You are the man that I believe in.”

Emma didn’t remember if he had ever gazed at her as intensely as he was now. She got lost into his eyes, until she felt his lips closing on hers and pulling her to him. Her lips parted as soon as she felt his tongue brushing them. She wrapped an arm around his neck, while her hand slipped further under the velvet of his vest. The taste of his lips and the way his tongue was now stroking hers were addicting. Without breaking the kiss, Emma got back on her feet, just the time for her to shift position: she sat back on his lap, this time facing him, which made him moan against her lips. He wrapped his arms around her, in her lower back, and pulled her even closer. Keeping her hand on his chest, feeling his heartbeat against her palm, her other hand ran through his hair. The kiss left them both thoroughly breathless. Still out of breath and completely leaning against him, Emma kissed his jawline and his neck, her lips lingering on his pulse point.

“You can’t imagine how hard you’re making it for me right now. How am I supposed to go back on deck now?”

Emma smiled against his skin and looked up. “You’re the captain, can’t you decide to stay if you want to?”

“Emma… Don’t tempt me.”

Her smile brightened. All she wanted was to capture his lips again, but he didn’t give her time to do so.

“Oooh!” She melted in his arms as he pressed an open-mouthed kiss on her neck. He then trailed kisses up to her ear.

“I need to go. Captain’s duties,” he whispered. She looked up into his eyes; he looked serious. Something in her expression seemed to amuse him. “You don’t have to worry, I’m not done with you.”

Emma had no word. At least, there was no hint of sadness left on his features; her teasing and confident captain was back.


	11. Shattered

Emma was tempted to follow him on deck, but decided it might be better to let him fulfil his responsibilities, and went to lie down on the bed, staring at the ceiling, passing her tongue on her lips. She knew she had drifted, but she was still too much overwhelmed by her feelings to regret anything. She lost herself in her thoughts, closing her eyes as she relived the moment, until falling asleep.

The next morning, she still had no regret about the past evening. All she wanted was to see him again. She left the quarters, expecting to find him on board. But she heard his voice much earlier than she had thought, coming from the lieutenant’s cabin. Planning on going to greet the two brothers, she came closer to the door. She had been unable to make out his words, but caught Liam’s.

“You truly love her, don’t you?”

Emma instantly stopped and leant against the wall, barely breathing.

“I’d go to the end of the world for her, or time. When she finds a way back to her realm, I can’t stay here. Wherever in space and time her realm is, I’ll follow her if she wants me.”

Feeling like she was not supposed to hear this conversation, Emma went back to the quarters and collapsed against the door, her heart beating fast. She knew he wasn’t willing to let her go, but she had not expected he would be thinking of leaving behind everything he loved, his brother, his ship, his home, just to be with her. She had to talk to him about this. She waited until hearing the door of the cabin; he had now finished talking to Liam. But she didn’t find the courage to go and find him on deck; she would just wait for him to come back to the quarters.

* * *

 

Killian was supervising his crew on deck. Since no sailor seemed to need him at the moment, he walked to the railing and looked at the horizon, thinking. He needed to tell Emma about this conversation he had just had with his brother. But he had to wait; perhaps she was still sleeping. He would give her a few hours and wait for her to come on deck. If she didn’t come, he would go to meet her in the quarters, even if he usually avoided to do this because he knew she sometimes needed her space. He just knew he had to talk to her. There was no doubt about his decision. Years earlier, when he had become a sailor with his brother, he had thought the ocean would be the love of his life. He had never thought someone would be capable of distracting him from sailing. That was until he had met her. Never a woman had made him feel this way, and each day spent with her had only strenghtened his feelings for her. Now that he knew what love was, he couldn’t let her go so easily; if she wanted him, he would leave with her. Though the Evil Queen would be less likely to reach them in this other realm, Liam refused to leave everything behind. A choice had to be made. But Killian was ready. If they found a way to travel from one realm to another, there were chances he would be able to come back and see his brother again. If he let Emma go, he would lose her forever. The past evening had comforted him in his choice; since the day when the pirate he had become had brought her back on board, he had sometimes doubted, wondering what she was thinking about him. There were times when he could see in her eyes she was trying to figure out how much he had changed, making him wonder whether she preferred the lieutenant he was before she had been taken away from him. But the previous night, she had made him understand she had nothing against the pirate he now was. He had even thought she was about to say the words; the words he had yet to use himself. Thinking of the past evening, he looked back at the passage leading below deck, tempted to go and find her in the quarters. But he focused again on the horizon, still lost in his thoughts. He was irrevocably in love. He loved every part of her and had yet to find her any flaw.

A voice pulled him out of his thoughts.

“A wardrobe change, how nice! Leather fits you well, lieutenant.”

Killian turned back instantly and, horror-struck, saw the Evil Queen standing right in front of him.

“It’s captain, now.” He quickly looked around. All of his men were immobilized the way Liam had been the first time she had come on deck. With relief, he realized Emma was still safe in the quarters. He only hoped she would not decide to come on deck now. He glared at the Evil Queen. “What the bloody hell are you doing aboard my ship?”

“Is that any way to address a queen? Your brother was much more polite. How is he?”

“Don’t you dare talking about him!” His jaw clenched, he unsheathed his sword, ready to fight. The Evil Queen smirked.

“Where is the woman you love?”

“Don’t get close to her!”

She laughed. “I must admit I am impressed. Not many people break into my castle and come out of it alive. There were so many opportunities for you to die, and you’re still here. All these risks taken just for her; do you realize how much she’s getting you into trouble?”

“I’d rather die now than live a hundred years without knowing her,” he said through gritted teeth.

A malevolent smile appeared on her lips. “I am certain she would enjoy the show. How about you call her so she can join us?”

“No!” Looking daggers at her, he made a threatening move with his sword. But with a move of the hand, she made it fly away. Suddenly, she was standing behind him and he heard her talking in his ear.

“Call her.”

“I won’t do it.”

“You know you can’t fight me, captain.”

Killian hated how close she was, how soft was her voice at this moment, or how her arms wrapped around his waist. The only one allowed to hold her like this was Emma. But he knew it was useless to try and fight; there was nothing he could do against her magic. His jaw hurting because it was clenched so tightly, he didn’t move, reluctantly letting her trail her fingers up his stomach and play with his chest hair.

“I may not be able to rip _her_ heart out, but I can rip out _yours_ ,” she said maliciously. Unable to stop himself, his scream resounded as her hand sank into his chest, her fingers closing on his heart. “Can you see how easy it would be for me to crush your heart?”

“Do it. But grant me one dying wish: leave Emma be.”

She sighed. “Love makes people so boring. Finally, you will suffer much more with your heart in place.”

Killian winced in pain as she kept her fingers closed, squeezing his heart. “Why are you doing this?”

“Did you really think you wouldn’t see me again after breaking into my castle and rescuing her? You’ve upset me, pirate. And for this, I shall destroy your happiness, if it is the last thing I do.”

Finally, she removed her hand from his chest and he felt free. But there was no time to be relieved: she was here. She looked worried; probably she had heard him scream.

“Killian!”

The next second, he witnessed something similar to what she had seen the first time the Evil Queen had come aboard, something they had never discussed: her magic. He felt the heat against his shoulder as the white light went straight to the woman who let go of him as she was sent away. Though amazed by this strike, he didn’t have time to marvel at her power.

“Emma, you have to run!”

Picking up his sword, he ran towards the Evil Queen, but she disappeared in a puff of purple smoke before he had time to reach her. Instantly, he turned to Emma, who was still here despite what he had told her, looking down at her hands, perhaps trying to make her magic work again. He ran to her, but the woman reached her first, appearing behind her.

“Emma! No!”

It was too late: the Evil Queen tossed an arm around her neck and, with a smirk, disappeared in another puff of purple smoke.

“Nooo!”

His men came back to life, but _she_ was gone, taken away from him, again. Turning his despair into anger, he drove his sword into the floor, the blade sinking between two planks of wood. Ignoring the sailors who came to him, saying words which didn’t reach him, he went to the wheel and, with all his strength, rotated it as fast as he could, turning around. Still ignoring his sailors, he went to hoist the sails to get a maximal speed.

“We’re heading back to the Enchanted Forest! Make sure the Jolly Roger stays on course!”

He went back to his quarters and slammed the door shut. Sadness imprinted his features as he trailed his hand over the book lying on the desk; it was probably the book she was reading before coming on deck and being taken away. His jaw clenched again at the thought of the Evil Queen. He grabbed his most recent logbook and his quill, and sat down to write.

‘The plan has changed. We give up on this bloody flower, and go back to the Evil Queen’s castle.’ He closed his eyes and thought of her, anger giving way to sadness. ‘Again, she took you away from me. Without your light surrounding me, I can already feel myself being drawn to the darkness. You can’t imagine how much you mean to me, and if you don’t know it already, I only hope I will have a chance to tell you this. But how many times will I need to lose you before the universe allows me to keep you forever?’

Again, his feelings switched to anger. He tore the page from the book, crumpled it and tossed it on the floor, before pushing book, quill and bottle of ink away and leaning his forehead in his hand, his fingers closing on his hair. He got up, planning to go on deck, but was stopped by his brother.

“You should be getting some rest, you still haven’t fully recovered.”

Liam ignored his words and seized his arm. “Killian, I know she took her away again, but losing control won’t lead you anywhere.”

“I am not losing control, I know what I’m doing! I’m going back to her castle, I will save her.”

“This morning, you made me realize how much you love her, and I know she cares about you too. This love you have is strong, no one can fight it. You found her once, you will find her again. But Killian, going to the Queen’s castle is too much dangerous. We should go back to this man, the Dark One, he probably knows how to find her.”

“The crocodile is odious and wants treasures in return. Last time I already gave him all I had. Infiltrating the Evil Queen’s castle doesn’t cost anything, and I could find her to get my revenge for what she did.”

“It could cost your life. Last time, I came out of it barely alive. Emma may not even be there. The Dark One can surely help you more.”

“The Evil Queen has to pay.”

“Killian, revenge is not the solution.”

“Are you saying I should leave her unpunished?”

“I am saying I want you to stay alive. If you go there, you may not live long enough to see Emma again.”

“I’ve survived until now.”

“Brother, trust me. Focus on finding Emma instead. The Queen already has something against you, she will hate that you counter her plans again: when you find Miss Swan, do as you told me this morning; follow Emma into her realm. You can start again, live a life together there, away from the Queen.”

* * *

 

Emma crashed on the stone floor. It didn’t take her long to realize what had happened: the Evil Queen had taken her away; she had lost Killian, again. She looked up; while she had miserably slumped onto the floor, her abductor had smoothly landed on her feet. Emma got up and had a lump in her throat as she swept the room with her eyes: the circular room with stone walls gave her a sense of déjà-vu. But it was not the same tower than the first time: she caught a glimpse of the window; she could not see the ocean, only mountains. The other difference was that there was no heavy chain with handcuffs in the middle of the room, but an altar.

“What have I ever done to you?” she asked the Evil Queen, daring to look her in the eyes.

“Foolish girl,” she said with a smirk. “It is not about something you’ve done, it is about what you are.”

Emma was disconcerted, not understanding. “What am I?”

“You are in love. And love is not tolerated in my kingdom.” Hatred could be heard in her voice. An evil glint appeared in her eyes. “But I can fix it. I will give you a choice.”

A choice. Emma didn’t like this. The first time she had been given a choice by the Evil Queen, Emma had to choose between going with her or watching the ship being consumed by flames; it was not really a choice, since one of the options was simply unconceivable. She was worried about the fact she had said that being in love was the problem, and that she could fix it. Was she about to give her some sort of potion which would wind up her feelings for him? Distracted by her thoughts, she had not been careful enough to see where the Evil Queen had taken what she was now holding in her hand.

“Here is an apple,” she said with a smirk, caressing the fruit as if it was some sort of treasure. “You can eat it, or not. The choice is yours.”

Her fears didn’t fade. “What will it do to me?”

“There is in this apple a poison. You won’t feel anything: one bite and you will fall asleep…” The woman tore her gaze away from the fruit and caught her eye before adding, “to never wake up again. Your body will be your tomb. And you'll be in there with nothing but dreams formed of your own regrets.”

Emma shuddered. It sounded terrible, and she had yet to hear the second option; it might be just as terrible. “What happens if I decide not to eat it?”

“I will send you back to the man you love.” Startled, Emma raised both eyebrows. The woman sneered. “See by yourself.”

With a move of the hand, the Evil Queen made a frame appear out of nowhere. The frame was so large that it was taking most of Emma’s field of vision; wide, higher than her, hiding her abductor. At first it was like a mirror: Emma could see her reflection, with the stone wall behind her. But soon, the background changed. She recognized it instantly: it was as if she was on the stern of the Jolly Roger, she could see the ocean behind her. The angle was then modified so that Emma was seeing in the frame what she would see if she actually was on the Jolly Roger: she was now staring at Killian’s back. He was holding the wheel. It looked so real that it was difficult to remember it was not. He turned back, and a beam lightened his face. She could see nothing but happiness in his eyes as he let go of the wheel to come to her. She pressed her hands against his hand and hook. Drowning in his eyes, she couldn’t remember why she couldn’t be simply happy, just like he was. It was like there was something wrong, she was not allowed to be happy, to be just with him. But she didn’t know what it was and it was scaring her. She tried to let him see her fears through her eyes, but Killian just kept beaming at her. That was until his face contorted with pain and he arched his back. This was when she saw her: drowning in his eyes, she had not seen the Evil Queen standing right behind him, her eyes locked on her, smirking.

“Killian!”

Emma wanted to help him, but she couldn’t move her hands, which were still pressed against his hand and his hook. Horrified, she saw the woman pull on something, and Killian arched his back even more. A hand still on his shoulder, the Evil Queen then showed Emma she was holding something red and brightly glowing. She let out a scream as she recognized it as Killian’s heart. The malevolent smile back on her lips, the woman held the heart over his shoulder, making sure the blonde would see it. Slowly, her hold on his heart tightened, and Killian bent, in agony.

“Please, stop it!”

But the Evil Queen didn’t stop. The smirk remained on her lips as she kept squeezing his heart. Tears were now rolling down her cheeks. Horror-struck, unable to move and powerless, Emma was mainly staring at Killian, who was not taking his eyes off of her while he was bending more and more. There were times when the pain seemed to be lower; he was then giving her a faint smile, as if trying to reassure her and make her understand he was alright. But it never lasted long, and his face contorted with pain again until, at some point, his eyes lost of their radiance and his eyelids closed. Killian collapsed and Emma screamed. She glanced at the Evil Queen; between her fingers was not a glowing heart anymore, but ashes. Emma screamed even louder and fell down to her knees, tears flowing down her cheeks, her eyes locked on his lifeless body. As the fact he was dead sank in, she shrilled. A white light blinded her and she heard the sound of shattering glass. Killian and the wooden floor of the Jolly Roger disappeared from view, being replaced by a stone floor scattered with shards of glass.

“Look at this. Your love for him is so strong that it triggers this magic you obviously can’t control.”

Still kneeling down, Emma looked up, her vision blurred by all the tears. The woman looked utterly satisfied. A wave of anger washed over Emma and she tried to use her magic, planning on knocking the Evil Queen out and escaping. But nothing happened.

“You really are unable to control it,” she sneered. “How pathetic, your magic is working only when it comes to saving him, today. It looks like you love your pirate more than you love yourself.”

Ignoring her words, Emma got up and glared at her. “I take that apple and he lives?”

“You can be sure he will live,” she said, smirking. “His grief will only be the greater this way.”

Emma snatched the apple and sat down on the altar, tears still rolling down because of this scene she had witnessed, and because of what she was about to do. Eternal sleep: the Evil Queen had said it would be like falling asleep, but it was more like dying; her life was over, she would never see him again. Even if it had not been true, it had seemed real: she had just watched the man she loved die. And now she was about to fall asleep to never wake up again. The worst part was that she never told him she loved him. Not once. She was too scared. Too scared that, somehow, saying it would make it real, and force her to accept her feelings. Her fears sounded ludicrous to her now, she should have told him when it was time. Now, it was too late, she would never have a chance to tell him because she would be sleeping eternally. But the sacrifice was worth it; she would do anything for him, including this. She only wished she had told him.

“The way you snatched that apple let me think you had made your choice. Will you take a bite or should we go and crush the heart of your pirate?”

“My choice is made. Congratulations, you’ve won.”

Her words brought a malevolent grin on her lips. A last tear rolling down her cheek, Emma took a bite and, fast, very fast, fell asleep.


	12. To the End of the World

The Jolly Roger was sailing at its maximal speed towards the Enchanted Forest. Finally, after days which had seemed only too long to Killian, land was in sight. His brother had convinced him; it was not to the Evil Queen’s castle they were heading, but to the Dark One’s mansion. The only problem Killian had was that he had no clue about how to find it. He knew it was somewhere in the Enchanted Forest, but where exactly, he didn’t know; the first time he had been there with his brother, the crocodile had found them and used magic to make them come and leave. Looking through the books in his quarters, the captain had found the one which had revealed to Emma the existence of the Dark One. According to what was written, summoning him was enough to make him come, but however hard he tried, the crocodile never came. Once on land, in this village where he had met him for the first time, his mission would then be to find him.

“What are you doing?” Killian asked, seeing his brother equipping himself with a sword.

“Gearing up for adventure,” he said on a tone implying it was obvious. “Land is very close.”

“Liam, it’d be better if you stay here, with our men. You haven’t recovered enough for this, yet.”

“I can take this. I am not so tired anymore.”

“I prefer to go alone. This is my fight, there is no need for you to take any more risks.”

“I could help.”

“Liam, please.”

He didn’t insist more and let Killian go alone. The captain had in mind to ask the inhabitants of the village about the Dark One; the first time, he had been there. Some of them might know him. But he didn’t need to ask anyone.

“Looking for me, dearie?”

Killian stood up straight, looking at the man sitting on a wooden cart. They were still on the docks, the captain had barely left his ship; it was as if the crocodile had been waiting for him here.

“How do you know that?”

“How could I not, after all those times when you summoned me?”

“You heard me?” His jaw clenched. “Why didn’t you come, then?”

“I don’t like the ocean, I prefer to be on solid ground.”

Killian glared at the Dark One, trying to tame the hatred he was inspiring him. “I need your help.”

A maniacal laughter escaped the crocodile. “Let’s discuss this in a more private place.”

The next second, they were in the Dark One’s mansion. The captain didn’t wait any longer.

“My love has been taken away from me, I need to find her. Can you help?”

“Maybe I can, maybe not,” the man replied on a singing voice.

“You’re the bloody Dark One, do something.” His jaw clenched, he was glaring at the man.

“Do you have anything from her?”

Killian looked through his pockets. Since she had not wanted to take it back, he had kept it; he brought out of his pocket Emma’s necklace and showed it to the man without letting go of it. “I have this.”

“Then, I know how to find her. A simple locator spell is enough.” Rumplestitskin paused to look sideways. Until then, Killian had not noticed the tall and black-haired woman standing near the window, holding a rag in her hand, and staring at him. “Milah, why are you still here? Dinner needs to be prepared, you know how I dislike it when you’re late.”

“Yes, beloved husband.” She nodded and left the room, her eyes lingering on the pirate. Her words had sounded fake to Killian, who looked curiously at the Dark One.

“She’s my wife,” said Rumplestitskin.

Killian raised an eyebrow, the idea he might be using magic to keep himself in the illusion he was living with a loving wife crossing his mind. But he quickly forgot about it.

“How does this locator spell work?”

“It doesn’t work if you don’t have anything to offer. All magic comes with a price, dearie.”

“The Jolly Roger.”

“The what?”

“My ship, the Jolly Roger. Help me find Emma and when I have her, my ship is yours.”

“You would trade your ship for a lady?”

“She is more than just a lady. She is the one I love. I would trade my life for her.”

Rumplestitskin laughed maniacally. “Love, love, love, what a funny thing. But I have no use of a ship, dearie. What else can you offer?”

“Are you bloody serious? I have nothing else of value to trade.”

“Yes you have, and it is in your pocket.”

Killian raised an eyebrow. The only thing he remembered having in his pocket was what he was now keeping in his hand: Emma’s necklace. “I can’t give you her necklace, I need it to find her.”

“I am not talking about her necklace, her necklace is in your hand. What I want is in your pocket.”

The captain then remembered of something. He patted his pocket; it was indeed there, he could feel it under his fingers. It was very valuable, but he couldn’t give it to him. It was perhaps Emma’s only chance to go back to her realm; even if it was dried and powerless, they had found a way to give it its powers back. They only needed to go to Lake Nostos, and she would be able to go back to her realm like she wanted, with or without him depending on her wish. His fingers closed on the bean. It was perhaps Emma’s only chance to go back, but it also seemed to be his only chance to find her. What was the point of keeping it if he couldn’t find her?

“Now the question is, is this a price you’re willing to pay?”

“Aye. I give you the bean, and you help me find her.”

“We have a deal,” said the Dark One, holding out his hand. Killian gave him the bean, which didn’t seem to be what the crocodile expected. He made a face and looked up at the captain. “It looks a bit dried. And without any magical power. Such a waste, what have you done to it? No one can fool the Dark One, pirate.”

“I’ve done nothing. You’re the one who wanted it. And it can be magical again. There is a lake, Lake Nostos, it can regenerate it.”

“Oh I see, very smart.”

“Emma found out about this lake. Help me with this location spell so I can thank her for this.”

With a maniacal laughter, he went to his cupboard, examined the different vials stored there, and picked one. “This is the potion you need. Pour it on the necklace, and the necklace will go back to its owner. No matter how far they are or what you do, it will never stop until it finds them. Following it is all you need to do. The door is this way.”

The Dark One indicated the way out, obviously dismissing him.

“Before I go, Emma had questions to ask you,” Killian said. She wanted to meet him, but he hated the man so much that he had to ask; perhaps if he came back with the answers she wanted, she would decide she didn’t need to meet him.

“Questions? Ask away, maybe I will answer them, maybe not,” he said with the same singing voice he had used before.

“Just answer them. How can we travel from one realm to another?”

Rumplestitskin let out a creepy laugh. “Without this,” he said, showing him the bean, “I’m afraid it’ll be very complicated.”

“Think of something, there must be a way.”

“Why would you want to go to another realm?”

“This is none of your business.”

“If you don’t answer my questions, why would I answer yours?”

“Emma wants to go back to the realm she’s coming from.”

“And you’re going to help her?”

“Aye, of course I will. If it is what she wants, I won’t hold her back.”

“But you love her. Why don’t you make her stay?”

Killian raised an eyebrow and stared at the man. “Are you daft? This is precisely the reason why. I love her, this is why I will always put her first, even if what she wants is to leave. Loving her means being able to let her go, if leaving is her wish. But what would you know about love? You have a wife who’s staying here only because you bewitched her.”

“My, my. How rude!”

Killian wasn’t sorry about offending him. He kept glaring at the man, wishing he wouldn’t have to see him ever again. But he couldn’t leave now. There was another question he wanted to ask. “You said you had written the prophecy, Emma wants to know why.”

“Just because she wants to know, you’re ready to lose your time talking to me?”

“Answer me!” Killian stopped himself from thumping the table and tried to keep his voice steady. “Why did you write it?”

“Writing frees the mind. I write whatever I see in the visions I have of the future.”

The pirate stared at the Dark One, incredulous. “You saw Emma and I in a vision of the future?”

“Yes, dearie. Not precisely, because visions are as mysterious as the future is uncertain. And I don’t see everything. If I had seen writing this prophecy would have led me to deal with you, for instance, I wouldn’t have written it.”

“At least the feeling is shared,” said Killian through gritted teeth.

“But I remember seeing her name and writing it all over a parchment,” Rumplestitskin went on, ignoring his comment.

“She is not even from this realm, how could you see her?”

“I saw that too. I saw she was coming from another realm.”

Killian thought of something else, of something which remained one of the biggest mysteries of his life. “I’m not supposed to be here either. Something happened years ago. With Liam, we were travelling to a place called Neverland. When we came back, it was like two or three hundred years had passed. How is this possible?”

“You’ve been to Neverland?” The Dark One tried to hide his surprise as soon as he could. “I’m flattered you think I can explain, but I can’t. Some mysteries are supposed to remain mysteries. All I can say is that Neverland is a place where anything can happen and, if the universe has decided you would meet Emma Swan, maybe it was, for the universe, the occasion to make you travel through time. Now, do you have another question?”

“Nope,” Killian replied distractedly, considering his theory.

“Very well. Have a nice day.”

The next second, the captain was back on his ship.

“Killian! It was fast, did you find him?”

“Aye, and I know how to find her.” Killian turned to the crew. “All hands on deck! Let’s set sail, now!”

“Where is she?” asked Liam, while their men went to their stations.

“I don’t know, but with this potion, the necklace will lead us to her. It is a locator spell.” Killian was confident. The crocodile was odious but, until then, his magic had proven to be reliable. “We only need to follow it.”

The captain poured the content of the vial on the necklace. Quickly, it rose into the air and flew towards the ocean.

“Not so fast!” Killian caught the chain. He had expected to face some resistance, but he couldn’t feel anything, even if the necklace was still floating in the air, in the same direction. Slowly, he let go of it, and the necklace floated away; he had been wondering for a second whether holding it had broken the enchantment, but it seemed to be all right. “Liam, I’ll need a hand.”

With only one hand, manipulating the clasp was complicated. They went to the wheel and Liam tied the necklace on the upper part of it. Killian oriented the ship so that the necklace was pointing at the ocean in front of them.

“Do you really trust this necklace will lead us to her?” asked Liam.

“Aye. The necklace will go back to Emma, we just need to follow it.” Killian didn’t want to doubt about this. He wanted to believe it would work. “Liam, you need to get some rest. You have been through enough already because of me, you have to recover.”

Liam patted his brother’s shoulder before going back to the cabin. Hours passed and Killian stayed behind the wheel, checking the orientation of the necklace. It turned out that the wheel only needed to be held in the same position, as the swan pendant kept floating towards the bow of the ship; with this kind of magic, the necklace would surely go straight ahead. Killian looked into the distance: somewhere out there, his Swan was waiting for him. Or at least he hoped she was waiting for him. He hoped she would not lose hope, and keep believing he was coming for her. He glanced at the sails; the Jolly Roger was already at its maximal speed, but it just didn’t seem fast enough. The first time he had visited the Dark One, seeing her rolled into a ball on the floor in this crystal ball had been the worst. The image had been haunting him. This was why, when he had seen the Dark One again, he had not asked to see her, preferring to convince himself she was alright. But now, he had some doubts, and uncertainty was even worse: questions kept streaming through his mind. Where was she now? What was she doing? Was she alright? His jaw clenched at the thought the Evil Queen might have hurt her. He had to find her, as fast as he could.

When the stars appeared in the sky, Killian hailed Smee. “Take the wheel, make sure the necklace keeps floating straight ahead.”

He went to his quarters, and came back with maps and a sextant. Spreading the maps on deck, he then stood up and looked up at the sky. With the sextant, he measured angles between stars and the horizon. These sights allowed him to calculate the position of the ship and visualize it on a map. For Killian, it was child’s play. Standing up, he checked the position of the necklace and went to the bow. Looking at the horizon ahead of them, his eyes then went up to the sky and stopped on the first bright star. The coincidence made him smile; the star above the horizon, the one he was looking at, shining above the point they were heading to, belonged to the swan constellation. The captain went back to his maps: now that he knew the position of the ship, and the direction, it would be easy to guess where Emma was kept. His finger trailed over the map, tracing the route of the Jolly Roger. But his finger didn’t stop; in this direction, the ocean was stretching far, so far that Killian reached the limit of the map before finding any land on their path. Was she on a ship in the middle of the ocean? It made no sense, whatever boat she would be on, it would be moving. Killian stood up again and used different stars to measure angles and calculate their position again. But the result was the same. Rushing to his quarters with maps and sextant under the arm, he rummaged through the chest inside which maps were stored, and found the one he wanted. He rolled it out on the desk. This one was covering a larger area. Localizing his ship, Killian trailed his finger over the map again, following an imaginary line, and finally found some land. The land seemed to be at the end of the realm, or at least was at the end of his map. He glanced at the scale and slumped in his armchair; according to the distance on the map, he now knew how long it would require to reach this land. He had not been prepared to the idea he would need to sail for six weeks before finding her. Staring blankly at the map, his hand reached for the bottle attached to his belt. ‘I thought rum was leading to bad form.’ Killian smiled at the memories of her voice and took a sip. He had not dared telling her how good it was to soothe the pain or how, when they were on their way back to the Enchanted Forest after she had been taken away from him the first time, he had found this bottle he had confiscated one of his men; a bottle which, in a moment of despair, had helped him to think happiness was still possible. During the few days they had spent in the village, elaborating a plan to break into the Evil Queen’s castle, he had stocked up on rum, and there had been evenings when it had happened to be helpful. Six weeks; the simple thought led him to take another sip. Perhaps he should get some rest. Glancing at the bed only reminded him of her absence; he left the quarters and went to the crew’s cabin where he had got used to sleep.

Days passed and routine set in. Killian kept checking on the necklace; it was still floating in the air, willing to go back to its owner, held back only by the wheel. Killian also spent much time with his sextant, measuring angles between celestial bodies and the horizon, calculating the position of the ship and following the path on a map. Every time, his finger was trailing over the map, passing between two islands of an archipelago they would apparently cross, and stopping on this same land. That was until, one night, he got a different result; the path seemed to be slightly deviated, and his finger passed very close to one of the islands of the archipelago, so close that he measured again. With some approximations, there were chances that the island was on their path. Killian had never doubted his method, but he was now ready to admit its accuracy was not good enough: he couldn’t be certain whether the necklace was leading them to the land he had identified at first as their destination, or to the archipelago which was three weeks of sailing away; still far, but it was still two weeks closer than the land at the end of the realm.

Hope Emma might be closer to him than he had expected brightened his mood. But the closer they were to the archipelago, the more obvious it became that the necklace was not leading them to this island. Killian denied the obvious for days, until this night when he realized the island was definitely not on their path. He had always loved sailing, but patience had never been his forte. The more days passed, the deeper was this void he was feeling; a void nothing seemed to be able to fill. It was like he wasn’t himself anymore, because he didn’t have her. On his ship, he had always felt like he belonged there, but it wasn't the same anymore. Sailing was not so fascinating, the stars didn’t seem so bright and beautiful. Life seemed to lose its luster. Liam had now recovered, and Killian was relying on him to lead the crew, himself going on deck only to check on the necklace or calculate the position of the ship, spending the rest of his time in his quarters, or in the crew’s cabin as he kept the bed untouched.

“You shouldn’t withdraw into yourself like this,” said Liam when he went to check on the necklace. They had been sailing for almost four weeks now. The first islands of the archipelago were now visible on the horizon. Killian didn’t reply anything and walked away, going back to his quarters.

But Liam didn’t give up so easily. When he opened the door, Killian quickly put away the bottle of rum he had been staring at, unwilling to let his brother know how he was trying to fill this void left by a broken heart.

“Killian, is there anything I can do for you?”

“Nope,” he said, not even looking up at his brother.

“I can only see your pain and I wish I could help.” Since Killian didn’t reply anything, Liam went on. “I also know isolating yourself is how you deal with it. You are still the same. You’re reminding me of this young child I used to know, the one who shut himself away after losing his mother too soon. You are still my little brother and will always be. I hope you know you can count on me.”

Not in a mood to be reminded of his childhood or hear any of these words, Killian stood up and silently led Liam out of the quarters before closing the door. Sitting back at his desk, he stared at the bottle of rum before trying to drown his sorrows. His mood didn’t get better in the next days. Feeling Liam’s eyes on him whenever he went on deck was annoying him. And one of the sailors didn’t help improve the situation.

“We’re not even sure this necklace will lead us to her. All this time just for a woman, this is foolish. She may not even be alive,” he had told another sailor. He had surely not expected to be grabbed by the collar and find himself face to face with the captain who was looking daggers, his jaw clenched.

“She is alive,” Killian said through gritted teeth. “And I will find her.”

“Killian,” said Liam warningly.

But Killian ignored him. “You can walk the plank if being on this ship is not what you want.”

“Killian, stop!” Liam separated the two men, his eyes locked on his brother. “We will find her, but you need to calm down.”

“Don’t tell me what to do, you’re not the captain anymore, I am.”

Liam wrinkled his nose and took Killian apart, out of the sailors’ earshot. “You smell of alcohol, is this how you’re spending your time in the quarters?”

Killian didn’t say anything and kept staring at his brother, his jaw clenched.

“Rum is not the solution,” said Liam. “What would she think if she saw you like this?”

“I can’t know, because she’s not here! I don’t know where she is or what this monster did to her. I am relying on a necklace to find her, but even if it does lead me to her, how can I know it is not a lifeless body I will find? I need her, she took a part of me with her when she left, I am nothing when she’s not here!” He walked away, his coat flying behind him as he turned back.

Back in his quarters, his own words kept haunting him. Out of anger, he had revealed what his biggest fear was, something he hadn't even admitted to himself until then: he couldn't be sure she was still alive. At this moment, the void inside of him was so large that it seemed to have engulfed his lungs, he could hardly breathe. Automatically, he reached for his rum. After a few sips, he stared at it, Liam's words echoing in his mind. He remembered how ashamed he had felt when revealing her he had tortured a guard into telling him where she was kept; he wouldn't be prouder to tell her that, instead of holding his head high, he had drowned his sorrows into rum. The simple thought disgusted him. The bottle smashed against the wall. Killian took the few bottles he had left and went on deck to throw them over the railing. When heading back to his quarters, he saw Liam was watching him, but he didn't stop or say anything.

The fear he might not find her alive was consuming him. The waiting was unbearable. Despite what his brother had said, he kept shutting himself away. But somehow, hope came back as, day after day, the land they were heading to was drawing closer and closer. According to his map, this land was mainly constituted of forests and mountains. The fear remained, but he kept his mind busy by planning his expedition, thinking of what he might need there.

Forty-one days had passed since she had been taken away from him when land was finally in sight. Killian was ready to leave, he had packed everything he thought he could need. He took back the necklace, which kept pointing the same direction, and put it around his own neck. His emotions were a mix of impatience and fear. In the evening, the ship finally reached land.

"Killian," called his brother, seizing his arm, "I know you want to go and find her, but do you really plan on going now? Consider waiting for the morning, the sun is setting down, it is not careful to venture there in the night, we don't even know this land."

"I don't have time to wait, I am leaving now. Now the question is, will you stand in my way?"

To his surprise, Liam stepped aside. "I won't hold you back. Let me help you carry all of this." Grabbing some of the bags, Liam accompanied his brother on the docks. "I won't offer to come with you because I know you will refuse. What are your plans now? How are you going to find her?"

He was right, Killian wanted to go on his own, and he was glad not to have to fight about this with him. "Quite simple, I'll try to find a horse and follow the necklace."

They had landed in a very small village, and they didn't go unnoticed: most of the inhabitants had gathered there, obviously not used to see such ships. Killian took advantage of the situation. He slowly walked closer to them.

"Can any one of you help me? The woman I love has been taken away from me. I know she is somewhere in this land, but I need a horse to go and find her."

At first, no one moved and the inhabitants glanced at each other. Finally, a woman stepped closer. "I have a horse."

She was followed by two other inhabitants. "I also have a horse."

"I own the stable. I can get a horse ready for you."

"Thank you for your kindness. Your gesture won't be forgotten."

At first planning on stealing a horse, it was finally easier than what he had planned. The two brothers followed the man who owned the stable. A horse was soon equipped. Liam helped Killian to charge the animal with the food, drinks, blankets, ropes, knives and everything he had judged useful to bring with him. He was now ready to leave.

"If I am not back in a week," he told Liam, "consider I have failed. There is no need to hold the crew in this land any longer."

Before his brother had time to say anything, Killian tossed an arm around his shoulders and pulled him to him; something he was doing so rarely that Liam was caught in surprise. "What are you doing?"

"This is long overdue. I’ve never thanked you for everything you’ve done for me. Thank you, brother." He got on the horse, took the lantern Liam was handing him, and left.

The necklace led Killian straight into the forest. The difference with sailing was that he couldn’t just follow the indicated direction through the trees: he was following the paths which seemed the closest to where the necklace seemed to be going. The lantern happened to be essential as, soon, the night had fallen and the canopy was stopping the moonlight. The sky was not even visible because the forest was so thick. Everything was quiet. Only the hooves of the horse hitting the ground were breaking the silence. Holding the lantern with his hook, Killian kept galloping through the forest. Now that he knew the waiting could be over anytime soon, that he could find her any moment, the impatience was more consequent than ever, but so was the fear. Not knowing how she was made the ride unbearable. Killian had lost track of time. He didn’t know whether time was only going by even more slowly than during the past few weeks, or whether he had truly been riding for hours. It seemed like the ride would never end. Only the thought he might see Emma soon encouraged Killian to keep going. As the necklace kept pointing the same direction, a thought crossed his mind: what if he was only supposed to cross the land? What if he reached the sea on the other side and the necklace kept pointing straight ahead? What if she was kept in a land even further? He didn’t want to believe this. Time had gone by so slowly that he felt like they had already sailed to the end of the world. He didn’t want to believe, but this thought still made his fears even worse. Endlessly galloping through the forest, Killian wondered how large this land was, since his map was only showing a part of it.

Daylight only confirmed Killian had not imagined he had been riding for hours. He was only hoping she was somewhere on this land. He thought of the moment when he had found her in this tower, of how, running up the stairs, he had known he was about to see her again. He had also been scared, because she had looked so weak in this crystal ball. But as soon as he had seen her turning to him, all of his fears had been forgotten. If he was asked about the happiest moment of his life, perhaps he would quote this moment when he had been able to hold her in his arms. The relief had been the greatest he had ever experienced. The only reason why he had not kissed her was only that he had been restraining himself; no matter how much he had been missing her, he had not forgotten how she had reacted to their first and until then only kiss. His lips had instead pressed on her neck and happiness had overwhelmed him. Killian only wished he could live this again. He was hoping that, soon, he would be able to drown into her eyes, to taste her lips, to hold her in his arms while savouring her scent. But he still needed to wait: the necklace kept leading him deeper in the forest. That was until, when most of the morning had gone, the direction in which the necklace was floating changed. Killian stopped the horse and retraced his steps. The direction changed again and he felt his heart thumping in his chest; if the necklace was truly heading to Emma, it could mean only one thing: she was close, somewhere on the left of his path. The trees and other plants bordering the path were thick. But further ahead, it was even worse, as it was not vegetation but cliffs which were preventing him from turning left. He came back to the part of the path bordered with trees and plants. There didn’t seem to be any passage so he alighted and cut through vegetation with his sword, pulling the horse behind him. Surrounded by plants higher than him, his only landmark was the necklace.

“Emma! Where are you?” he screamed, hoping she might respond.

But there was no reply. Vegetation was so thick that Killian was considering going back and try to find another path. It was when he was about to turn back that he found himself facing a curtain of vines; a curtain towards which the necklace was floating. There seemed to be something on the other side. Getting back on his horse, Killian crossed the curtain and found himself in some sort of tunnel. It led him to a place surrounded with mountains. In the middle stood a tower.

“Emma!” he tried to call again, going closer to the tower. There was still no answer. Killian removed her necklace and let go of it. He saw it floating to the tower and soaring to disappear through the window at the top. His heart skipped a beat: she was there. He alighted and ran to the foot of the tower.

“Emma! Love, please answer me.”

Killian was trying to do his best not to give in to panic. The fact she was not replying while she was obviously there let him imagine the worst. He ran around the tower a first time. The second time, he went more slowly, looking more carefully for a door through the ivy which was covering the walls, but found none. There was only one solution left. Killian looked up at the tower with more attention. The first half was covered in thick ivy. The second half looked more complicated to climb, but not impossible. He rushed back to the horse, glad he had spotted mountains on the map and planned what was needed for some climbing. With his pockets full of tools which might be useful and ropes around his shoulders, he began his ascension. After a beanstalk, the first part was easy. For the second part, he brought out of his pocket an axe. With hook and axe, he used the grips the stone wall was offering to climb.

“Emma!” he tried again.

The fact she was not replying couldn’t be good. Even if she was sleeping, his yells would have awakened her. Now, he was hoping the necklace had been mistaken. He was hoping he wouldn’t find her here, but somewhere else, where she would answer him.

It was like his body was working on his own; he was not here to control it, fear was paralysing his mind. Dreading what he could see at the top, the ascension took less time than he had expected: he reached the edge of the window and pulled himself up.

“Emma! No!”

Killian got inside and got rid of the rope while running to the altar. He couldn’t think anymore, it was like the world had stopped. The view was reminding him of the worst moment of his childhood. Emma was peacefully lying on the altar, her eyes closed, her arms crossed on her stomach, her skin very pale, though still as beautiful as ever.

“Emma! Please come back to me,” he said, his eyes sparkling with tears. He reached for her hand. She was as cold as ice. “My love, please. I need you.”

Keeping her hand in his, he pressed his head over her chest, downhearted. But whereas he was thinking it was over, he heard a sound. Realizing what it was instantly gave him hope again: though it was very slow, her heart was beating. Killian stood up straight, looking down at her, and quickly realized what it was.

“A sleeping curse,” he whispered.

During this time spent with her, reading books about magic, he had learned about them. He had also read about the counter-curse. His eyes still shining with tears were full of tenderness as he cupped her cheek.

“Please show me your love for me is as true as mine is for you.”

His hand reached for hers again. Slowly, he bent over her and softly pressed his lips on hers, tenderly tugging at her upper lip. Warmth washed over him and he opened his eyes just in time to see the wave of golden light spread across the room and into the distance; a wave accompanied by the sound of a deep breath.


	13. Guilty Pleasure

Feeling air suddenly filling her lungs, Emma opened her eyes.

“Emma!” she heard almost instantly.

At first totally disorientated, she barely had time to wonder where she was when his lips captured hers, his hand slipping in the nape of her neck, and his arm slipping in her back. Then, she knew: she still had no idea about where she was, but she knew she was with him, and it was all she cared about. She tried to kiss him back as intensely as he was, but her lips seemed to be only weakly responding. Her whole body actually felt weak and she didn’t know why. She didn’t remember what had happened before the present moment. She let him pull her up in a sitting position, their lips against each other. She was totally drowning in his embrace, and didn’t try to find her way back to the surface.

When she did resurface, she instantly regretted this moment when the fact he was there was the only thing that she knew; when he let her breathe and she looked around, she recognized the room and it all came back to her. Her eyes filled with tears when she saw the shards of glass scattered on the floor. Seeing the distress the room was inspiring her, Killian immediately cupped her chin to look her in the eyes.

“What has she done to you?”

“Poisoned apple,” she managed to say despite the emotion strangling her voice.

“Why did you eat it? Did she force-feed you?” The hatred the thought of the Evil Queen was inspiring him made his jaw clench.

“No, she said I had a choice. But I didn’t. She showed me what would have happened if...” Memories of the vision made tears even more abundant and stopped her from talking. Her sentences were fragmented when she managed to talk again. “The glass, it’s what she used to show me. It shattered in the end, I think I did it, I don’t know how. She showed me. I saw you die. There was no choice to be made, I… I can’t lose you.”

His arms wrapped around her and she pulled her to him, her cheek pressed against his chest, his hand in her hair.

“You won’t lose me, you don’t have to worry. If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s surviving.” He kept her in a tight embrace, his eyes on the shards of glass. It had been the second time the Evil Queen had pretended to give her a choice, using him to get what she wanted, and Emma had sacrificed herself for him, again. He tightened his embrace, resting his cheek on the top of her head. “You are safe now.”

Pulling back, Killian cupped her cheek. She had stopped crying. There were only a few tears left, which he softly wiped away. Finally, she smiled, leaning into his hand.

“You saved me,” she said in a low voice. Overwhelmed with all the memories of what had happened with the Evil Queen, the mirror and the apple, she was only now realizing he had awakened her.

“All it took was a kiss,” he said with a tender smile.

His smile brightened as he watched it dawn on her; he knew she had read this chapter as well, he knew she knew what this kiss meant. Speechless, her eyes were searching his, as if looking for some kind of confirmation. He only smiled more.

“Actions speak louder than words, but talking about words, I was afraid I would never have a chance to tell you this, something I could have told you so many times before,” he said, his hand still cupping her cheek, looking her in the eyes. “I love you.”

Emma’s lips parted. Somehow, she already knew, because he was wrong; many times he had let her understand how he was feeling about her. But hearing the words still took her breath away. She wanted to say them back, but for some reason they wouldn’t come out. Her eyes were locked on his. She was thinking of this kiss which had pulled her out of this eternal sleep; surely he knew without the words. Surely he knew that if she didn’t have these feelings for him, she would still be asleep. ‘Actions speak louder than words,’ since the words wouldn’t come out, she could just show him. Getting down of the altar, she closed the distance between them and captured his lips, trying to communicate all the tenderness and love she was feeling through the kiss. She smiled when he was breathless, and smiled even more when she felt he would have gladly gone for another kiss.

“Let’s get out of here,” she whispered, slightly out of breath herself. She looked around and it was when she realized there was no door or no hatchway. “How did you get here?”

“By the window,” he said with an amused smile. “And I’m afraid that’s also how we’ll get out.”

Emma looked out of the window and, wondering how they were supposed to go down, looked back at Killian. He was emptying his pockets on the floor and she came closer.

“You took all of this with you.”

“Don’t look so surprised, love, I can happen to be far-sighted,” he chuckled. “There was no door at the foot of the tower. I thought perhaps I had simply not seen it, but I considered the option that there wouldn’t be any at the top either. I could have climbed down the way I climbed, but it was not as easy as a beanstalk. With you I prefer to be more careful. Now… abseiling is not something I’m used to.”

“You don’t know how to go down?”

“I haven’t said that.”

“You have a figure eight descender,” Emma spotted among the items.

“You know this?”

“Don’t look so surprised,” she replied on a teasing tone, using his own words, before kneeling down next to him, examining what he had. “I did some climbing at school, I’ve learned how to use this. But usually we need a harness.”

“A what?”

“A harness. How do you plan on belaying yourself?”

Killian raised an eyebrow, somehow confused by her question. “With the rope.”

“You’re going to tie yourself with the rope?”

“Aye.” He was obviously not seeing the problem.

“It won’t be comfortable, the rope will hurt you.”

“That’s what you’re worried about?” Amusement tinted his features. “I can handle it. How about I get ready, you come with me, and we go down together?”

“Together?”

“Aye, I can’t let you get hurt by the rope.”

Emma sighed, knowing she couldn’t do anything if he had decided to be stubborn. “Would you change your mind if I told you it’s not safe?”

“Why would it be unsafe?” A smirk appeared on his lips. “Can you hold onto me tightly?”

This sudden question made a soft blush cover her cheeks. “Yes.”

“Then, you’re safe,” he said.

“And you’re stubborn.”

Killian laughed and pressed a soft kiss on her cheek. “Perhaps I am.”

Among all the tools he had brought, he gathered what they needed. Standing up, he coiled a short rope around his waist and passed it inside the descender. Emma was watching him, trying to remember what she had learned years earlier.

“Wait,” she said, “it’s not going to work if you pass it now.”

“I must admit I’ve rarely used such a device.”

“Let me help.” Taking the descender back, she passed a loop of the long rope inside it, before placing it back around his waist. Not moving, he watched her finishing to coil the rope. His hand then covered hers.

“I’ll take care of the knot.”

“Killian, I don’t like this. Isn’t there any other way? How can we know the knot won’t just give way.”

“Trust a captain to tie safe knots,” he said, looking around. “This is exactly what we need.”

Killian was looking at one of the metal rings in the wall above the window. He went to pass an end of the long rope inside it and tied a knot Emma recognized as a double figure-eight loop. Finally ready, he stood up on the edge of the window, and before she had time to say anything, tried the system: sitting in the air, his feet still on the edge of the window, he smiled at Emma whose breath had been taken away by fear.

“See? It’s safe.”

He sat back on the edge of the window, indicating her to join him. She knew he wouldn’t risk her safety; if he told her it was safe, she would trust him. Slowly, she came to him and sat on his lap, crossing her legs around him.

“Do you really think this is the right way?” she asked, passing an arm in his back and placing her hand on his shoulder, pulling herself closer to him.

“Definitely.”

His hooked arm around her waist and his hand tightly closed on the rope, he went back outside. They started to go down, Killian walking down the wall of the tower while little by little letting the rope slide in his hand. Emma saw how tight the rope seemed to be around his waist.

“Are you sure it’s not hurting you too much?”

“Emma, with you holding me like this, there is no pain to be felt.” She looked up from his waist and drowned into his eyes. “Love, when you look at me like this, I just want to kiss you. Not the thing to do when our lives hang by a thread, or by the rope in my hand, to be more precise.”

Biting her lip to repress a smile, she looked down at the said hand. “And you’re saying this doesn’t hurt? At least let me help.”

“How do you want to help?”

She placed her hand below his, closing it tightly on the rope. “There’s no need to let the rope slide in your hand like this. With two hands, it’ll be easier. Now, just let go of the rope and place your hand below mine.”

That was what he did and, little by little, they went down, each of them with an arm wrapped around the other one, both focused on the rope and on coordinating their hands.

“I think you were right when you said we make quite the team,” she said, beaming, when they finally reached the ground. Taking care of freeing him of the rope, she then threw his arms around his neck and kissed the man who loved her. Since he had told her, she had been able to focus on the present moment and put aside all the bad memories; everything that had happened, all of the hell she had had to walk through, had led her to this moment, and she wouldn’t trade a day for a chance to feel like this, to feel blissful. She brushed his lip with the tip of her tongue and smiled as he seemed to go for more when she pulled back, his lips following hers. Capturing them again, she melted in his embrace.

“What was that for?” he asked, passing his tongue on his lips, their foreheads still against each other.

“You wanted a kiss while we were going down this tower. Maybe you were not the only one.” Quickly, she pecked his lips. “Thank you.”

“My pleasure,” he replied with a light smirk.

It was only then that she looked around. “Where is the Jolly Roger?”

“Not here. I came by horse. I told you riding could be convenient, it wasn’t so easy to find you.”

This was when Emma realized she was probably mistaken; when waking up, she had felt like she had taken a bite of this apple on the previous day. Her voice was hesitant when she asked, “how long have I been asleep?”

“If she cursed you right after taking you away from me, I’d say seven weeks.”

Her mouth fell open in surprise. She had no word. Her eyes followed him as he went back to the horse.

“Do you fancy some drink? Or anything to eat?”

Emma quirked her eyebrows, not expecting the question. She had no idea, because her thoughts had been kept busy. “I don’t know.”

“Well, if you decide you want anything, there’s some food here, and some water there.”

“Such a provident captain,” she said with a smile, joining him. “Should I sit before or behind you?”

“Before. If you sit behind, I won’t be able to see you.”

A light giggle escaped her. “I could say the same.”

“Before,” he insisted with a bright smile.

When they left, Emma sitting on the horse before Killian, it was already the middle of the afternoon.

“How long is the ride?”

“It took me all night and all morning to come. But it may take even longer to go back, we’re not as much in a rush as I was.”

Emma would never admit what she was thinking at the moment; how delighted she was at the prospect of spending hours like this, with his hooked arm wrapped around her, leaning back against him.

They remained mostly quiet. Killian didn’t have any necklace to follow this time. He had to focus on where they were going, especially because he had not paid much attention to where he was going on the outward journey; he didn’t remember of the exact path, he only roughly knew the direction. Leaning against him, Emma was lost in her thoughts. She thought of the last evening she had spent in the quarters, how close they had been already, and of this conversation she had overheard between him and his brother, of how she had wanted to talk to him and had been waiting in the quarters that he would come, until she had heard him screaming on deck. Unwilling to think of what had happened next, her thoughts went back to the first day when she had met him, and she relived everything that had happened since she had arrived in this realm.

Hours passed and the night fell. Emma tightened his arm around her.

“If you’re cold, there’s a blanket.”

Emma bit her lip, repressing a smile, and tilted her head to look at him. “You’re warmer than a blanket.”

Killian laughed.

“How about you take this? I’ll tell you where we have to go. For now, we just need to follow the path.” He handed her the reins of the horse. As soon as she took them, he wrapped his second arm around her, his cheek coming against hers as he came closer, holding her in a tight embrace. “Better?”

“Much better.”

Emma followed his indications while enjoying being in his arms. But his embrace was so warm and soothing that she soon found herself fighting sleep. She resisted, focusing on the path ahead of them, fighting to keep her eyes open. When the path ahead was straight, she allowed herself to close her eyes, only a few seconds. But the few seconds were long enough for her to doze off; her head tipped over and she suddenly sat up straight, opening them again.

“Do you want me to take back the reins?”

“No, I will be fine. I’ll keep my eyes open.”

But it was easier said and done; several more times, her head tipped over.

“You still don’t want me to take the reins back?”

“No, I can do it. Just keep holding me like this.”

“As you wish,” he said. Keeping his arms around her, he pressed his lips on her neck and trailed kisses down the line.

“Killian… what are you doing?” she asked, automatically tilting her head on the side to stretch her neck for him.

“Keeping you awake,” he said between two kisses.

Brushing her clothes aside, he bared her shoulder and kept trailing kisses. Emma melted in his embrace. His method was efficient; she was not willing to sleep anymore.

“On the right,” she heard him say.

It was only when they were at the junction of two paths that she realized what he meant. His cheek was back against hers, he had stopped the kisses. Emma bit her lip, not daring to ask him for more.

About half an hour later, she found herself fighting sleep again; she dozed off again to wake up with a start.

“Love, do you want to stop for the night?” Killian didn’t like the idea of making her sleep on the ground, but he couldn’t leave her like this, the journey was still long and she obviously needed some rest.

“No.”

Killian chuckled. “And you’re saying I’m stubborn.”

The open-mouthed kiss he pressed on her neck was more intense than the previous kisses and was enough to arouse her. She was about to reply when he talked.

“Emma, look,” he said, pointing a sign. “There’s a tavern over here. Turn left, unless you really want to keep riding all night.”

“I think it’s better to stop for the night.”

She turned left. Soon, they saw lights at the end of the path. Light, and also sounds of laughter, were coming out of the windows of the tavern.

“The Snuggly Duckling? Funny name for a tavern,” Emma commented.

Tying the horse to a gate nearby, they entered the tavern. The place was crowded and noisy, full of men who made Emma think of brigands. It was late in the night already, and all of them seemed to have had too many drinks. They were obviously interested in the newcomers, especially in Emma, who felt many eyes on her.

“Stay close to me,” said Killian, grabbing her hand and keeping her close while they crossed the place to the counter. “We’d like a double room. Unless you prefer two single rooms?” he added, turning back to Emma.

She glanced around. The place was not really reassuring. She didn’t mind sharing a room with him, anyway. “A double room is fine.”

“Sorry, Sir,” said the man behind the counter after checking his register. “The only room I have left is a single room.”

“That’ll do,” said Emma.

Surprised, Killian looked at her, before paying and taking the key the man handed him. The room was larger than Killian had expected; there was not just a bed but also an armchair and a small table along the wall.

“Take the bed, I’ll take the armchair.”

“Don’t misunderstand what I am going to say, because I’m planning on sleeping but, Killian, there’s enough place for both of us in this bed. We’d be very close but it’d be more comfortable than the armchair.”

Killian chuckled. “Very tempting offer, love. But I am sure the armchair is fine.”

To prove his point, he went to try it. What he didn’t expect was for Emma to join him, sitting sideways on his lap.

“I thought you were planning on sleeping.”

“Not now. There’s something I’d like to know: how did you find me? You told me I had been sleeping for seven weeks. What happened all this time?”

“You want to hear the story now?”

“Yes. Unless _you_ were planning on sleeping now?”

“I’ll be fine, I can tell you now.” He settled to be more comfortable, sinking in the armchair and pulling her closer, wrapping his left arm around her. “Time has never gone by as slowly as it went by these past few weeks.”

Killian told her most of the story. He told her how, when seeing her being taken away from him, he had changed direction, how he had been planning on going to the Evil Queen’s castle but Liam had convinced him to go to the Dark One instead. He explained how, though extremely annoying, the crocodile had helped him by giving him a locator spell which, once poured on the necklace, had indicated him the way. More than a week had already passed. It had been the start of six other very long weeks. Killian told her about how he had kept track of the position of the ship, about how the archipelago had given him a false hope, but skipped the part about the void he had been feeling inside, or how he had been trying to fill it.

“Finally, we reached land in the end of the afternoon. Liam tried to hold me back until the morning, but I couldn’t wait any longer. We were in this small village and most of its inhabitants were gathered on the docks. A man lent me a horse when I told them I needed one to find you. I then followed the necklace. I didn’t know how long I would have to ride, I’ve lost track of time. It seemed so long that I considered the possibility I would reach the other end of this land and still need to go further. But the necklace led me to this tower. I was both relieved and scared; relieved that I might see you again, scared of what she might have done to you. My love, I was so afraid when I called for you and got no reply. I climbed the tower, and when I reached the top, I saw you on this altar. My worst fears seemed to have come true. I thought it was over, I thought you were gone. I thought I had failed and I had lost you forever. I thought your heart would never beat again.”

Emma, who had been quietly listening to his story until then, never taking her eyes off of him, wrapped her arms around him and tucked her face in the crook of his neck. Leaning his head against hers, he went on with his tale.

“This was the first time I was relieved to be wrong. When I took your hand and rested my head over your chest,” he said, his words making a soft blush cover her cheeks, “I’ve heard it. Your heart, it was still beating. Then, I knew. I knew you were asleep, and I knew there was a way to wake you up. I was only hoping it’d work.”

Emma pressed a kiss in his neck.

“You spent almost two months fighting for me and you never gave up.” She hardly believed someone could do this for her. But she noticed how he looked down. “What’s wrong?”

“I’ve let you think I’ve fought valiantly, but I haven’t told you everything. These weeks away from you were ones of the worst. There was this emptiness I can’t even describe. Without you, it was like I was lost in the dark. I am quite ashamed to say that rum was the only thing that made me believe I could see the light again.”

“I’m so sorry,” she said, cupping his cheek.

“Sorry about what?”

His look of surprise disconcerted her. The answer was obvious to her. “Sorry that you went through this hell because of me.”

“Emma, love, don’t be mistaken.” He sat up straight and searched her eyes, his fingers under her chin. “Do you really think I regret anything, when all of this led me to you? I don’t regret a single moment. I would go through it over and over again, because if it allows me to be with you, it’s worth it.”

“Killian…” She simply had no word. Her arms tightened around him and her face went back to his neck, a single tear rolling down her cheek as she wondered what she had done to deserve his love. It was only after a moment that he talked again.

“Emma, there is something I need to tell you. This locator spell, the crocodile asked for a price. He didn’t leave me a choice.” She looked up, worried. “I gave him the bean.”

Emma was relieved. With everything that had happened, she hadn’t granted the bean a single thought. She even barely remembered they still had it. “Killian, it’s alright. If you hadn’t, I would still be sleeping in that tower.”

“Don’t you understand? I’ve traded your only way to go back to your realm. By the way, there’s something I wanted to tell you about it. On the day when I’ve lost you for the second time, I had talked with Liam. I never had a chance to tell you about this: when you go back to your realm, if and only if you want to, I’d like to come with you.”

Emma bit her lip. “I’ve overheard this conversation between you and your brother.”

“You did?” He raised an eyebrow.

“I was going on deck to see you, and I’ve heard your voice in his cabin. Killian, I can’t let you do this. I can’t let you leave your ship and Liam behind. He’s your brother. And he told me once that sailing is what you love.”

“But that was until I met you. I love you more. I can’t let you go. You are my first love, and I want you to be my last.”

A soft sigh left her. “Never stop being so perfect.”

Tenderly, she pressed her lips on his and kissed him. There were so many things she wanted to tell him, but she simply didn’t seem to find the words. She then leant against him, playing with his fingers.

“You have no idea how much I have missed holding you in my arms like this.”

“Keep me, then.”

“Be careful with what you say, love. I may be tempted to do just that,” he said with a crooked smile. “But what if you suddenly decide you want to run away?”

His tone was teasing but his words were reflecting something deeper. He was actually worried he might cross a line and make her run away, and this was the reason why he had rejected her offer to share the bed. Emma focused again on their now intertwined fingers, biting the inside of her lip.

“I won’t run away. You have no idea how soothing and comfortable your embrace is.”

She stayed against him, her head in the crook of his neck, keeping her hand in his. Before she had time to see it coming, she dozed off in his arms. A tender smile was on his lips when he felt she was asleep. He hesitated, tempted to keep her in his arms all night, but after a moment decided to tuck her in.

When Emma opened her eyes, she was in a dark room. Everything was red. There was something extremely oppressive with this room. On the walls were blood red curtains on fire. There were curtains but there was no window. With panic striking, Emma looked around. There was no door either. She was trapped in this room, surrounded by fire. She started with surprise as she felt something warm on her ribs. But this warmth was different from the unbearable heat of the room, this one was enjoyable. The warm feeling went down to her waist. Suddenly, the red room disappeared and everything was black. What she had felt like a warm feeling was still there and she reached for her waist. Her hand covered Killian’s and she smiled, instantly relaxing as she realized she was lying on her side, in the bed of this single room at the tavern.

“Are you alright, love?” Killian asked from behind her, keeping his hand on her waist. “You were shuddering.”

“Nightmare,” she simply replied.

Grabbing his hand, she wrapped herself in his arm, pressing his hand against her chest, keeping it close to her heart.

“Please stay here.”

“As you wish,” he said, shifting closer and pressing a soft kiss on her cheek.

It took her no time to fall back asleep. When she woke up in the morning, the sunlight was filtering through the window. The sun seemed quite high already. Killian still had his arm around her, his hand in hers over her heart, holding her so close that his chest was pressed against her back. He seemed to be still asleep and she wondered whether she should wake him up. At first not moving, she then started to play with his fingers. It was when she took them to her lips that he finally woke up and kissed her cheek.

“May I say I’ve never slept so well than this night?”

Emma smiled and turned in his embrace to face him. Quickly enough, she drowned into his bright blue eyes and she didn’t seem to be the only one to get lost. His eyes locked on hers, his fingers reached for her face, softly caressing her cheek. None of them seemed to keep track of time and know how much time had gone by while they were staring and smiling at each other. Emma had forgot everything, at this moment it was like he was the only one in her world. She was first to come back from this world which seemed to belong only to the both of them.

“Shouldn’t we go?”

“Aye, you’re right. If you let me stare at you like this, I could look at you all day. Are you hungry? They surely have what’s needed for breakfast.”

Emma nodded. Together, they went down. The place was much more quiet now. Most of the men who had been there in the evening had left. The few of them who were still there were asleep. The bartender cleaned one of the tables and invited them to sit. When he listed the different accompaniments for pancakes, Emma interrupted him as soon as she heard one of them.

“Chocolate!”

Killian chuckled and turned to the man. “The same for me.”

“Very well,” said the man before going back behind the counter.

“You made your choice quite fast,” said Killian, amused. “I didn’t know you were a fan of chocolate.”

“Chocolate is my guilty pleasure.”

“Your guilty pleasure?”

“Yes, something I love even if…”

“I know what a guilty pleasure is.” A light laugh escaped him. “I was just surprised chocolate was yours.”

“Oh, and what’s yours?”

With a smile, Killian locked his eyes on hers. “The beautiful woman sitting right in front of me.”

Speechless, Emma didn’t even try to stop the blush from covering her cheeks and kept staring at him. Fortunately for her, the man soon came back with the pancakes, which happened to be so delicious that Emma hesitated to take a second one, but she resisted the temptation.

* * *

 

“I go before you, like yesterday?” Emma asked when it was time to leave.

“Aye.”

“So that you can stare at me.”

A smirk tugged at his lips. “Exactly. Now, get on the horse.”

“Alright, captain.” Something caught her eye and a mischievous grin appeared on her features. When walking past him, she briefly stopped and kissed him, her tongue brushing the corner of his lips. She giggled when seeing his look of surprise. “Guilty pleasure. You had some chocolate left.”

Killian chuckled and settled behind her. Soon, they were back on the way to the ship.

“Can we do like yesterday? I take the reins while you keep me in your embrace.”

He didn’t hesitate long before handing her the reins and wrapping his arms around her. “Like this?”

“Yes. How long do you think we need to ride before finding the ship?”

“A long time. I don’t think we’ll arrive before the end of the afternoon.”

“Good,” she said, leaning back against him.

Hours passed and they kept riding through the forest. Emma stayed in charge of the reins while Killian guided her, holding her in his arms. Her eyes instantly closed and her lips parted when she suddenly felt his open mouth on her neck.

“Killian… We’re going to go straight into a tree if you do this.”

“Horses are smart enough to avoid trees on their own.” He kept his lips on her neck until they reached a junction. “On the right.”

Emma opened her eyes just in time to turn right. “How do you know where we’re going?”

He laughed. “I don’t.”

Her eyebrows raised in surprise and she turned back to him. “You don’t know where the ship is?”

“Not precisely. My guess is that it’s somewhere in this direction.”

Emma focused back on the path and decided to trust his instincts, not that she had a choice anyway. And she was right to do so: finally, after a couple hours, the path led them to a village and the Jolly Roger came into view.


	14. The Plank

“You found her!”

Emma looked around and saw a man she had never met coming to them as they entered the village.

“Aye. Thank you for the horse.” Killian alighted, before holding out his hand to Emma and helping her off the horse. “Is there anything I can give you in return?”

“No, sir. Knowing that I have helped reuniting you with your beloved one is the best I could ever ask for.”

“You are very kind,” said Emma, touched by his words.

The man smiled. “And you both form a beautiful couple. There is something life taught me: when you have love, you have everything you need.”

“I know,” said Killian, locking his eyes on Emma.

The man only smiled more. “I will take the horse from here. Now, go and live the happy life you deserve.”

“Thank you,” said Emma while Killian bowed his head.

Taking her hand in his, the captain pulled her towards the docks, and together they walked to the ship.

“Killian!” Liam ran off the ship and pulled both of them into a hug, an arm wrapped around each of them. “You did it.”

“Aye, there’s no need to leave without me.”

Liam stepped back and Emma looked at the two brothers, ignoring what they were talking about.

“Do you really think I would have abandoned you here?” asked Liam.

“That’s what I had told you to do, if I didn’t come back after a week.”

“And that’s what I had decided to ignore. Killian, I couldn’t leave you here,” he added when seeing the look of surprise on his brother’s features. “I am glad to see you both safe. And, brother, this smile fits you very well.”

Emma looked up at him, her hand still in his. He was smiling just as much as he had been all day. He seemed to be happy, and it was all she wanted.

Smee came to them when they went on board and addressed Emma.

“Is there anything you need?”

“No… Thanks.”

The man left and Emma turned to Killian, surprised by the sailor’s behaviour. The captain caught her eye and shrugged. He then tossed an arm around her neck and pulled her to him to press a tender kiss on her cheek.

“Welcome back aboard, my love.”

* * *

 

They set sail again, heading back to the Enchanted Forest. In the evening, they had dinner on deck. Killian, Emma, Liam, and the sailors who wanted to join, including Smee, were gathered, sitting in a circle under the stars.

“It’s nice to see you back on your feet, Liam.”

“Thank you, Miss Swan.”

Killian drilled a dozen coconuts, one for each of them.

“Before saying anything else, I’d like to do something I’m not used to do, but in these circumstances I reckon it is needed: I apologize for my behaviour of these past few weeks. I’d like to say I wasn’t myself and decline all responsibility, but I know what I have done and I take responsibility for it.” He paused, looking around, but not surprisingly, the sailor he had threatened to make walk the plank had not joined them. “Now that this is done, and more importantly, I’d like to propose a toast in honour of the most wonderful woman I’ve ever met, the one who won my heart.”

“Killian!” she called in a hushed voice, nudging him. “Is that really necessary?”

He turned to her and flashed her a bright smile.

“Yes it is, I love you,” he answered in a hushed voice as well. She bit her lip, staring at him, while he turned back to his crew and raised his coconut. “To Emma!”

Surprised by the number of sailors who had joined them, she had assessed they were only enjoying the occasion to be off-duty. She had not expected all of them to raise their coconuts and repeat the captain’s words. Hopefully, the moonlight wasn’t bright enough to show the blush covering her cheeks.

“Captain, why don’t you share with us the tale of your adventure?”

“Yes captain, tell us how you found her.”

“Brother, you don’t seem to have a choice anymore, you owe them a story.”

Looking at her as if asking for her approval, Killian then slipped an arm in her back and started to tell the story she had already heard. Again, Emma was surprised, as all the sailors around her seemed to be listening carefully. She turned to Liam, who was sitting on her other side, and lightly poked his shoulder to attract his attention.

“Why do they seem to approve of me, now? Has Killian said something to them?” she asked in a hushed voice.

Liam smiled. “He hasn’t told them anything. They only needed time, they probably noticed during these past weeks how important you are to him and how much he cares about you. I am sure the other sailors will eventually accept you as well, give them some more time.”

She focused back on Killian’s tale when she heard Smee’s question. “She was in a cursed sleep and you woke her up with a kiss? How is that possible?”

“Magic, Mr Smee. If you read books, you will learn that there is a magic more powerful than the others: love.”

Emma sighed delightedly and kept her eyes locked on him, listening to him. He looked like he was enjoying telling his crew what had happened. Emma tilted her head, examining his features; there even seemed to be some amusement.

“We discussed different ways to go down this tower, but at last she told me she could hold onto me tightly and convinced me the best way to go was together.”

“Killian!” She nudged him, harder this time. It was definitely amusement that she had seen on his features. He was now laughing and pulled her closer to him.

“Alright, this was not as it happened. I was the one telling her we could go down together.”

“And he can be very stubborn,” Emma added. The two brothers and a few of the sailors laughed.

“I had my reasons, it was not only to keep her in my arms.”

“It wasn’t?” she asked, doubtful.

“You had been sleeping for seven weeks, love. Your body needed some time to awaken, I couldn’t let you climb down a tower after barely half an hour. But of course, if I had told you that, you would have tried to convince me otherwise, because I’m not the only one who can be stubborn.”

Her smile meant it all: she knew he was right. Not having anything to reply, Emma leant her head against his shoulder and listened to him go on with his tale. She loved the way he was using words to turn their adventure into a tale. Thankfully, he didn’t give any details about all the hugs and the kisses, or about the single room.

“Finally, we reached the village. There is something the man of the stable told us: ‘when you have love, you have everything you need.’ The man is very wise, because he is right.” Killian turned to Emma and softly cupped her chin. “You are everything I need, and loving you is all I want to do. You are more than everything I could have ever dreamed of and words are not strong enough to tell how much I love you.”

Emma’s lips parted. It was not the first time his words sounded to her like romantic poetry, but every time he was taking her breath away. Staring into his eyes, she was carried away to this world which belonged only to the two of them. Her lips seemed to be naturally pulled to his and she crossed her arms in his neck while kissing him. But too soon, the kiss ended.

“We’re not alone,” he reminded her in a whisper.

Keeping him close to her, her eyes still closed, her forehead against his, she was feeling only slightly embarrassed by the presence of the sailors.

“I am tired,” she whispered so that only him could hear her. “I’ll be in your quarters.”

* * *

 

When she came back from the bathroom, he was there, in the quarters, studying one of his logbooks.

“That’s the outfit you were wearing the first time I met you,” he said, recognizing the black sweatpants and the red tank top.

“Sometimes I wear it for the night,” she said with a soft smile, walking to him and sitting sideways on his lap. “I’ve spent seven weeks sleeping, and I still feel exhausted.”

“It wasn’t a usual sleep. If you feel like you need some rest, go to bed.”

“Killian?” He raised an eyebrow, giving her his full attention. She bit her lip, blushing at the thought of what she wanted to ask him. “I was wondering if you’d go to sleep in one of those cabins again. Last night…” She paused, distracted by his smile, before adding. “You could stay here.”

His smile brightened at her words. “I still have some duties before being off, but I’ll join you in a couple hours.”

He pulled her closer and captured her lips. His fingers went through the blonde curls of her hair she had let down. This time, there was no sailor around, no reason to stop the kiss. The tenderness there was in this kiss made Emma melt. She cupped his cheeks with both her hands, her fingertips grazing his hair, and leant her forehead against his, a smile on her lips. Opening her eyes again, she studied his features. If she was asked to define perfection, she would surely describe him; this dark hair, this tanned skin, this straight nose, this sexy scruff highlighting this sharp jawline, these attractive lips she wanted to kiss again, and especially these bright blue eyes she once again drowned into. Her hands still on his cheeks, she kept her eyes locked on his. After all these times when she had wanted to tell him, she finally let the words slipped out of her mouth.

“I love you.”

She saw the brightest smile settle on his features, a smile not so visible on his lips, but especially in his eyes. His hand slipped in the nape of her neck and he pulled her to him for another kiss.

“You have no idea how fulfilled you make me.”

“I thought the captain was never wrong, but you are.” She pecked his lips. “I think I have a pretty good idea: I’d say I make you fulfilled just as much as you make me happy.”

She rested her head in the crook of his neck and he tightened his embrace.

“I love you,” he whispered in her ear, sending a shiver through her body.

“I love you,” she repeated, her fingers closing on his vest. Again, his embrace was so comfortable and soothing that she felt her eyelids grow heavy. She knew she wouldn’t have the strength to stand up and walk to bed if she waited any longer. But she stayed on his lap, only warning him, “I may fall asleep.”

“Fall asleep if you feel like it. You are always welcome in my arms,” he said, holding her against him, his fingers softly trailing in her back. Emma drifted off to sleep. Killian loved the way her arms were wrapped around his shoulders, or how she was leaning against him. He was not willing to let her go, and waited before tucking her in.

Like most of the other times, she remained fast asleep when he carried her. He softly kissed her cheek and sat back down at his desk. He had been planning on rereading his logbook, but once he had been sitting, watching her sleep was much more interesting. It was only distractedly that he looked through the pages, spending most of his time watching over her. He was planning on going back on deck when, like during the previous night, he saw her shuddering. Fear imprinted her features. Giving up the idea of going back on deck, Killian settled behind her. The night before, he had managed to awake her without scaring her, so he did the same, placing his hand on her side the same way, and trailing down her waist. Like the night before, he felt her fingers softly closing on his hand. He shifted closer when she wrapped herself in his arm, but not close enough to be able to look over her shoulder and check whether she was alright.

“Love? Did you have a nightmare again?”

“Yes.” She remained silent for a moment. He felt her breathing slowing down. “It was the same than last night. I was in this oppressive room again, with curtains on fire and no door, trapped. I don’t understand, it makes no sense.”

This was one of the many things he was admiring in her: she was a tough lass; not anyone had the ability to wake up from a nightmare and say it made no sense. And not anyone could land in a new realm and take life the way she was as it was coming, instead of lamenting her fate like some would do. Lost in his thoughts, he had not said anything and Emma tilted her head in an attempt to look at him.

“Are all your duties fulfilled already?”

“No. I had planned on being off-duty only in a few hours.”

“Does this mean you need to go?”

He couldn’t repress the smile due to the obvious disappointment in her voice. “Not if you want me to stay.”

She didn’t say anything but he felt her hold on his arm tighten, keeping his hand pressed over her heart.

“Then I can stay.”

“Won’t the crew miss you on deck?”

“Not as much as I would miss you if I went there.”

He softly kissed her neck before laying down behind her, tenderly holding her against him, his eyes closed. He thought of the last evening they had spent on the ship before she had been taken away from him. They had been already very close to each other, but during these weeks when he had been looking for her, never had he expected to be allowed to hold her in his arms as much as he had since finding her. It seemed like they were getting closer every day, and he was wondering just how close she would let him be. The night before, he had kept his hand still, but the red top she was wearing was allowing him to feel her skin directly under his fingers, and the temptation was irresistible. At first, he only moved his thumb, brushing her skin, testing her reaction. Until then holding him rather tightly, she let go of his hand. He was now free to move, but unwilling to cross the line, his gestures were slightly hesitant. He was moving slowly, giving her time to stop him if she wanted to. But she didn’t. With more assurance, his fingers softly trailed up her neck and down again, wandering around over her chest and her stomach, while remaining attentive to any sign indicating he was going too far. But she didn’t say nor do anything, other than leaning even more against him. He wished he could look into her eyes, to read her thoughts and share her feelings. The thought she might just not dare to stop him was annoying him and he paused.

“Don’t stop,” she whispered.

With a smile, Killian imagined the blush which was probably covering her cheeks now; something she was usually trying to hide though he was finding it adorable. He closed his eyes again and, more confidently, let his hand wander around. Only one layer of clothes was separating them, but to him it was still one too many; reaching her lower stomach, he slowed down to give her time to stop him, and let his fingers slip under her top. He ran his hand over her stomach, following her lines and mapping her body, caressing every inch of her skin. He could keep doing this for hours and he was wondering if she was feeling it too; this feeling keeping her in his arms was all he wanted, this feeling his heart might explode from all the tenderness and love he felt towards her, this feeling she was all he needed, this feeling that by her side was where he belonged. Tightening his embrace, he stopped his hand on her breast and pressed another kiss on her neck. When he felt her reaching for him, he thought it was to shift his hand, but she actually grabbed his arm and kept it against her.

Both remained quiet, simply enjoying being together in the silence of the night. It was how her hold on his arm loosened that let him know she was asleep. A smile stretched his lips. Now that she was back on board, he didn’t need to escape his quarters anymore, like he had done for weeks. He wasn’t interested in being here if she wasn’t anymore. By her side was where he wanted to be; he would follow her wherever she might go, of course always on condition she wanted him. He couldn’t explain how it had happened, he just knew meeting her had changed his life for the better and he couldn’t go back to the man he was before. What was he doing with his life before she came into it? Without her, his life was empty. This love was the best thing that had ever happened to him. With a smile on his lips, he finally fell asleep.

* * *

 

Emma opened her eyes when she felt a thumb brushing over her breast. Obviously, he was already awake, and if this was his way to wake her up, she might as well pretend she was still asleep; she closed her eyes again. It was not the first time she was experiencing the touch of his fingers, but every time she was amazed by the softness of his moves. She also had yet to figure out why his embrace was so soothing: she had never slept as peacefully as these past two nights. She smiled as he was not moving only one finger anymore; his hand was trailing over her stomach. She kept giving no sign of being awake, enjoying his touch. Soon, she couldn’t keep pretending: he tickled her side and she squirmed. Busted, she turned in his embrace to face him.

“Finally you’re awake,” he said on a teasing tone.

“I’ve actually been awake for quite a while, now,” she admitted.

“I know.” He chuckled when he saw her expression. “Your breathing was not as deep and your heart rate increased.”

“Betrayed by my own body,” she said with a smile, before drowning into his eyes. She let out a soft sigh while she admired their beautiful shade of blue. She had finally told him these three words she had tried to tell several times, and nothing had changed. It was what she had been afraid of, that telling him would change everything. But it was only getting better. With him, she was just happy. She made a face when remembering of someone’s existence. “Killian, what will we do when she comes again? She will know you saved me, she will never stop until she gets what she wants. She will come back.”

“Then, we’ll be ready and we’ll defeat her. Since the day when I met you, I’ve spent more time looking for you than being with you. I don’t intend to let her take you away from me again.”

Emma gave him a faint smile. “I wish I could control my magic.”

“That’s something I wanted to talk to you about. We never had the occasion to discuss this.” Or, when he had got the occasion, he had preferred to wait for her to broach the subject, because it was about her and he was unwilling to force her to talk about in case she didn’t want to; perhaps there was a reason why she had not mentioned it. Now that she had addressed the topic, it was the occasion. “You had never told me you had magic.”

“I didn’t know I had magic. The first time was when she tried to rip my heart out, when you were tied up to the mast. But I didn’t control anything, it just happened. Killian, it scares me.”

“Why? This magic is amazing, it is beautiful.”

“But it is a power I don’t control. What if I hurt someone?”

“I believe in you. I can tell you won’t do anything wrong.”

“I’m afraid I will. This is one of the reasons why I want to meet the Dark One. Maybe he can teach me.”

Killian tried to hide how much he disliked the idea. He was already willing to keep her away from him; the idea of letting him teach her anything was not appealing at all. “Before thinking of asking him for help, what if _I_ can help you? Would you let me try to do something? If it doesn’t work, then we can think of the Dark One.”

“What do you have in mind?”

A smirk appeared on his features. “I have yet to be creative. But I’ll find something and do everything I can to help you. Tell me more about it. Do you remember using some magic other than these two times when I was here to witness it, and this time when you smashed the mirror?”

“Should I count the moment when you woke me up from this cursed sleep?”

“I don’t know. I am not sure it was the same thing. The two times with the Evil Queen, your magic was white. When I kissed you, it was golden. Let’s focus on the times when you were awake, what happened exactly? You must have thought of something to trigger your magic.”

Emma bit her lip; she perfectly remembered what she was thinking of. “I knew what she was doing, I thought I was about to die. And then, I looked at you. Killian, when I was locked in this tower, I’ve spent much time trying to understand what had happened. When you awoke me from this sleeping curse, I don’t think it was the first time our love was saving me. I’ve read magic was emotion. When I looked at you on that day, when she was about to rip my heart out, I... I was just willing to be in your arms just one more time. I thought of our first kiss, of how you… of this feeling like I was burning inside.”

“Burning inside?” he repeated with a smirk, raising an eyebrow, obviously enjoying this piece of information.

“Yes.” She blushed and lightly bit her lip before reaching for his cheek. “You made me feel like this more than once.” Wondering why she had revealed this, she quickly came back to the previous subject. “The second time I used magic, I can’t explain how I did it, it went so fast. I came on deck when I’ve heard you scream. When I saw her with you, it just happened. I realized only when I saw this white light sending her away. I didn’t realize either on the third time. She was the one telling me I had shattered the mirror, but I don’t remember doing anything, I just remember kneeling on the floor after she had showed me…”

Emma was unable to finish her sentence and shifted closer to him, pressing her head against his chest, biting her lip to fight back the tears as she remembered this scene. Thinking, his hand still under her top, he let his fingers trail in her back.

“It seems like your magic is triggered in situations of immediate danger.”

“Yes. But it doesn’t always work. Right after shattering the glass, I wanted to use my magic against her, but I couldn’t.” She remembered the words of the Evil Queen when she had not been able to save herself, ‘you love your pirate more than you love yourself.’ She was probably right.

“I know what we can do,” Killian said, pulling her out of her thoughts. “Join me on deck when you’re ready.”

He kissed her cheek, got up and left the quarters. She needed more time to get out of the bed and out of the quarters.

Wondering what he had in mind, she joined him. He flashed her a bright smile when he saw her.

“You’re here! Come with me.”

“What’s your plan?”

“You’ll see. Now, I want you to stay here.”

“Where are you going?” she asked when he walked back to the railing of the ship.

“You pushed the Evil Queen away, twice, and you shattered a mirror. Twice I was in danger, and twice your magic was triggered. Now, you can surely do something against this: I won’t stop walking back,” he said, putting a first foot on the plank. “You surely know walking the plank is the death sentence for sailors.”

Standing where he had told her to stay, Emma wasn’t taking her eyes off of him. He had to be kidding. “You won’t do this.”

“Watch me.” Both his feet were now on the plank.

“Killian, don’t be silly.”

“Silly? I’m not silly.” He took another step back, keeping his eyes locked on hers.

“Killian, stop!”

“You stop me.”

“I don’t know how to use my magic!”

But he kept walking back. He was on the middle of the plank now. One wrong move, one loss of balance, and he would fall. How was he expecting her to use this magic she was unable to control? She ran to the railing and, ignoring his protestations, carefully walked to him and wrapped her arms around his waist.

“Don’t go further. I can’t use my magic.”

“Be careful.”

He looked much more worried now that _she_ was on the plank. Emma glanced down and gulped as she saw the agitated sea below them. Slowly, she walked back and let out a sigh of relief when she reached the railing.

“This was not the way you were supposed to stop me.”

“I can’t let you drown. And I’m telling you I can’t use my magic.”

“Love, you can do it. Don’t forget I was there, I saw the power inside of you. Now, do you trust me?”

“Yes. You know I do. It is in me I don’t have trust.”

“Perhaps you should, because I know you can do it. But since you trust me, do you allow me to try something?”

“Yes.”

Emma regretted replying so fast; she didn’t know what he had in mind, she only knew he could be stubborn. She became even more suspicious when he picked up some rope.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying differently. Would you mind standing up against the mast?”

Not feeling like refusing him anything, she walked back to the mast. Curious to see what he had in mind now, she watched him coil the rope around her, tying her up to the mast.

“Since you’re tied up, for fairness, I will be too. Smee!” The man came to him and Killian handed him another rope before turning his back on him, his arms crossed in his back. “Don’t ask any question and tie my arms together, make sure the knot is resistant.”

“But, captain…”

“I said, don’t ask anything.” The man complied. Once Killian had his arms tied up, he addressed his crew. “My only request to you is not to say or do anything. Emma has the situation under control, even if she doesn’t know it.”

“Killian, don’t do this!” Emma said as she saw him going back to the plank. What had crossed her mind to let him tie her up to the mast?

“I’ve told you, you’re the one who has to stop me. You can do it. You know that with my arms tied up, there is no way I can survive if I fall down. And I doubt my heavy coat will help. Once waterlogged, it will only lead me to the depth of the ocean.”

He was already very close to the edge. Emma tried to fight against the rope, but she couldn’t free herself.

“You’re going to drown!”

“No, I won’t. You can do it.”

“Killian, I don’t know how!”

“I trust you.”

Panic struck her when he disappeared from view as he fell off the plank. “Killian!”

Tied up to the mast, she couldn’t even see him. But suddenly it happened: her magic was triggered. The rope broke. She didn’t even have time to run to the railing: Killian appeared again and she stared with wide eyes. He was watching the water carrying him, a wide smile on his lips. The magic wave crashed on deck, flooding the wooden floor while he landed smoothly.

“Love, that was bloody amazing! Can we do it again?”

“No!” Still watching him with wide eyes until then, not believing what had just happened, she ran to him. She had never felt so mad at him. She wasn’t even sure she had ever felt so mad at anyone. The thought of slapping him for walking the plank crossed her mind. “Don’t do this ever again! You could have drowned!”

“But I didn’t. I knew you could do it, I knew you’d save me. You don’t seem to know how powerful you are. Look at what you’ve just done, you’ve created some huge wave to bring me back on deck. This was brilliant! Emma, I didn’t mean to cause any panic, but if walking the plank can help you realize what I already know, if it can make you realize you have it inside you, then it was worth it.”

Hearing the tenderness in his voice and seeing all this love in his eyes made her forget the idea of slapping him. Instead, she grabbed his collar and her lips crashed into his. She still didn’t know how or why he had so much faith in her. She only knew that, though disapproving his method, he had managed to trigger this magic she had been trying to control so many times. She was feeling like she loved him more and more every day, and tried to communicate her love through this kiss which was more intense than ever. Pulling back, she looked up at him.

“You’re soaking wet.”

Her comment made him smirk.

“Is that a state you fancy? Should I take care of making you wet as well?” he asked, wrapping his arms around her lower back and pulling her against him.

Emma looked at him with wide eyes, wondering whether she had heard him right. With this smoldering look he was giving her, it was difficult to keep a clear head. As usual, she drowned into his eyes.

“If you look at me any harder, you’re gonna drill a hole in my head.”

Killian laughed and went for another kiss.


	15. There's No Place Like Home

Melting in his embrace, Emma looked up at Killian. He was holding her so close that he was soaking her clothes, but she didn’t try to pull back. She was distracted by how messy his wet hair was.

“What are you thinking about?”

“Hmm?” His smirk was not helping her focus. “Nothing,” she said. There was no way she would admit how tempted she was to play with his hair. “Just, don’t do this ever again.”

“Even if that was the most extraordinary thing I’ve ever experienced and that I got a hell of a kiss afterwards?”

“You’ve been lucky with the kiss. I was tempted to slap you.”

“Really?” This seemed to amuse him more than anything.

“Seriously, Killian. Please don’t put your life in danger like this ever again. You really scared me and I don’t need this, I’ve already been through enough, lately.”

“My apologies, I won’t walk the plank again. I just knew you’d save me, and I’ve been blinded by this will to make you see how amazing you are.” His fingers softly reached for her cheek. “Will you forgive me?”

Emma sighed, leaning into his touch. “For some reason, I can’t seem to be able to be mad at you for more than a few seconds. Of course I forgive you.”

She captured his lips and kissed him.

“Not that I’m in need of any specific reason, but what was that for?”

“To show you that you don’t need to risk your life to get a kiss,” she said with a smile. “Can we stop with magic for today, and work on other fighting skills? I still need some training in sword-fighting.”

“Sounds like a good plan. But I am afraid I have some captain’s duties to fulfil first. Would you give me a few hours? Then, I’ll be all yours.”

“Of course,” she said before pecking his lips.

* * *

 

Emma and Killian came back from below deck, ready for a sword-fighting lesson. The captain had taken his heavy soaked coat off. He stood in front of Emma, his hand on the hilt of his sword.

“Let’s see how much you remember from the first time. Ready?”

She placed her hand on the hilt of her sword and imitated his position. “Yes.”

They both unsheathed and soon, the sound of the swords bumping into each other echoed on deck. Emma was focusing on defence rather than attack, like she remembered he had told her. She blocked all of his blows, and took care of avoiding the mast as she stepped back. But eventually, a second of inattention when the blade of his sword hit hers and the hilt slipped from her hand.

“Very well, love!” He sheathed his sword while she picked hers up, a bright smile on her lips because he sounded so proud of his student. “The only thing I can tell is that your moves could be smoother. It would be much easier and less exhausting for you. Last time it was the same, but you will improve with time: for your moves to be smoother, you need to relax. Once again, you’re too tense. But I think I can help.”

Emma watched him going to stand behind her. “What are you…”

She dropped her sword and closed her fingers on his arms which he had crossed on her stomach, leaning into his embrace as he kissed her neck.

“I just know how you’re melting in my arms when I kiss you like this,” he whispered in her ear. “Now, you’re relaxed.”

“I am indeed. So much that I’m not sure I can stand on my feet now.”

Killian chuckled. “Do I have so much power on you?”

She didn’t reply, distracted by his hand which she grabbed to stop it from wandering around. “Killian, not now. Behave.”

This only made him chuckle again and press a kiss on her cheek, while he was still holding her against him.

“Distracting the opponent like this shouldn’t be allowed,” she said. “If I lose the next fight, it’ll be your fault.”

“I’m ready to take the blame,” he laughed. “Speaking of the next fight, should we start again?”

She nodded and freed herself from his embrace to pick up her sword.

Like the first time, she stopped each of his blows, and avoided finding herself blocked against the mast or the railing. The thought it could last like this for a long time crossed her mind. Instead of keeping a defensive strategy, she attacked. But she was too slow: he was the one to disarm her. Watching her sword falling on the floor was not the thing to do, as it gave him the required time to trap her in his embrace.

“Nice try, love, but not good enough.” Once again, he was standing right behind her, but this time with his sword against her throat. “You’re in danger, princess, you’ve been caught by a pirate.”

Emma smiled brightly, not even thinking of trying to break free, and leant even more against him instead. “I’m not afraid. And since when am I a princess?”

“Isn’t it how it works? Since I’ve rescued you in this tower, twice, doesn’t that make you my princess?” he asked, looking at her from over her shoulder.

She giggled and he beamed in response, his eyes sparkling with happiness. “Does that make you my Prince Charming?”

“A prince? No thanks, I’ll stick to being a pirate.” Playfully, he added on a menacing tone, “a pirate who is now holding you captive.”

“The princess is still not afraid.”

“Lass! Your survival instinct is failing. You should be afraid, you’re at the mercy of a ruthless pirate.”

“A ruthless pirate with a not-so-secret soft side.”

With a bright smile lingering on her lips, she softly reached for the blade and pushed the sword away, lowering his arm. She turned over and captured his lips, one hand trailing up to his hair and the other one moving down his arm while she kissed him. Her fingers slipped between his hand and the hilt of his sword. She leant against him so much that he was forced to make a step back to keep balance. Still leaning against him, she wrapped her leg and pressed it behind his calves. She smiled against his lips as, unable to move, he did exactly what she wanted and sat down on deck, their lips not pulling apart. Trying not to get lost in the kiss, she focused on what she was doing and kept leaning against him. It was only when he was lying on his back and she was on all fours on deck, leaning over him, that she stopped kissing him. A smug smile was on her lips when she freed her hand from his and playfully placed the sword against his throat.

“Distracted, captain?” she asked on a teasing tone.

Realizing his mistake, a crooked smile made its way to his features. Emma’s mind went blank as her eyes stopped on his tongue, which had just appeared in the corner of his lips.

“I must admit you bested me.”

Her smile brightened at his words. His tongue disappearing out of sight helped her focus on his eyes again, but his gaze was so intense that she didn’t seem to recover the ability to think. Her tongue quickly brushed her bottom lip as she looked at him. It had always been like this; since the very first time when they had met, he had always had this ability to get her lost in his bright blue eyes. There had always been so much intensity in his gaze that she had never managed to resist. Maybe she should have got used to it with time passing by, but on the contrary it seemed like it was harder and harder to resist. Giving up on trying, she removed the sword from under his throat. Her fingers left his hair to close on his vest, and her lips crashed on his. This time not fighting to keep her focus, she lied on top of him and got lost. Her hand, until then holding the hilt of the sword, went through his hair. Drowning in the kiss, she didn’t realize right away that he had switched their position, rolling her under him. Their lips pulled apart. Emma opened her eyes only when she felt the cool metal of the blade against her throat. He had taken advantage of her distraction to take his sword back, and was now looking down at her with the same smug smile she had when the positions were switched.

“And here again, you lose. I could jab you with my sword right now.”

Both her hands now clutching his shirt, Emma looked up at him with wide eyes, unable to stop herself from seeing a figurative sense to his words. Killian was watching her with a playful smile.

“How am I losing? You said I had bested you,” she said, using his own words.

His smile widened and he leant closer. “But I never said you had won the fight.”

Emma wanted to reply it was unfair, but she lost her words. She even forgot to breathe. Lying on her back, all she was seeing was him on a background of blue sky. His look was definitely more intense than before, as if there was something more in his eyes.

“What are you both doing?”

Emma started with surprise and tilted her head. Seeing Liam suddenly reminded her they were on deck. Killian was not less surprised, as he had also lost himself in this world which belonged only to the two of them.

“Practicing,” she replied to the man who seemed amused.

“Can’t you see, brother?” asked Killian. “I’m teaching her how to be a fearsome pirate, and you’ve just interrupted the best fight of the century.”

“My apologies, I should have noticed it was only a fight,” Liam said, chuckling. “Seeing how you two were looking at each other, I wondered if you remembered you were on deck.”

Killian and Emma glanced at each other with the same smile on their lips, both repressing a laugh. Just one glance and they knew; they knew that they had both forgot they were not alone.

“Is there anything else that you wanted, brother?” asked Killian, sheathing his sword back, but staying over Emma.

“Actually, there is. I wanted to check our position, but I can’t find the sextant. Last time I saw it, it was in your hand.”

“I surely placed it back in the top drawer of the desk.”

“Killian,” Emma called, tugging at his shirt and waiting for him to look down before asking. “If I’m supposed to be a fearsome pirate, shouldn’t I know how to navigate? You should teach me how to use a sextant.”

He beamed before looking up at his brother. “Forget about it, I’ll take care of checking our position.”

Liam nodded and walked away, and Killian focused again on Emma. His hand reached for her hip and slipped under her clothes, softly brushing her skin as his fingers trailed up to her waist. She stopped him, placing her hand over his.

“Don’t make me forget again that we’re not just the two of us.”

“The fact we’re not just the two of us can easily be fixed.”

It was not the first time during this day that his words had made her look at him with wide eyes. She didn’t know whether it was his smile or his look or the combination of both, but again it was difficult for her to focus.

“Aren’t you supposed to show me how to use a sextant?” she asked on a teasing tone.

“Aye, let’s make a pirate out of you!”

Killian stood up and held out his hand to her, making her stand up as well. He looked at the setting sun.

“Something wrong?”

“If you don’t mind, we’ll wait for the stars to shine. I’ve always preferred the night sky.” He glanced at her and she nodded. “Which gives us a bit of time before dinner.”

“Can you keep yourself occupied until then?” Emma asked.

He raised a curious eyebrow. “Aye, I can. What are you up to?”

“It seems like I have time for a shower.” A teasing smile stretched her lips. “And don’t even think of it as the occasion to be just the two of us.”

Without giving him time to reply, she pecked his lips and went to the quarters.

* * *

 

Wrapped in her towel, her hair still tied in a messy bun, Emma was lost in her thoughts when she came out of the bathroom and back into the quarters. It was when she saw him that she jumped with surprise.

“Killian!” Her hand instinctively reached for her towel, making sure it wouldn’t risk to fall. “I thought you were on deck.”

“I was.” She noticed his smile as he looked her up and down and she felt her cheeks lightly warming up. “I came to look for the sextant. Not in its right place, but I’ve found it.”

She looked at the device he was showing her before her eyes travelled to the bed behind him, where she had left her clothes.

“Good. Now, if you don’t mind…”

She walked past him as she went to pick them up, and felt his eyes on her as she went back to the bathroom. Closing the door behind her, she bit the inside of her bottom lip. She had walked back to the bathroom rather fast, focusing on the door, because she knew. She knew that the thought of accidentally dropping the towel had crossed her mind and that, had she caught his eyes, she would have lost herself. She tried to stop thinking about this, or about how her attraction to him seemed more and more irresistible, but she failed. Dressing up and tying her hair in the usual ponytail, she then went back to the quarters, where he was waiting for her.

“Is it time for dinner yet?”

“Aye, you’re right on time.”

She walked to him and looked around the room; she wouldn’t be willing to go back outside if they stayed in the quarters. There was another option she liked. “Can we go out and eat on the railing? This way we can watch the night falling while waiting for the stars to shine.”

“Of course, love.”

This was exactly what they did; going to their usual spot on deck and enjoying dinner in the twilight. Time seemed to fly by and, quickly, the sky darkened.

“Is it dark enough, now?”

“Aye, it is. I’ve left the sextant in the quarters, just wait for me here.”

Sitting alone on the railing, Emma looked up at the sky. She tried to remember the constellations he had pointed, but there were so many stars that she couldn’t find any. Well might she try to identify any of them; she found nothing. Feeling like she had been staring at the sky for a while now, she wondered what was taking Killian so long and looked around. He was standing just a few feet behind, watching her.

“Did you find what you were looking for?” he asked with a smile filled with tenderness.

“No.” She was unable to hide the disappointment in her voice.

“It’s alright, love.” He came back to sit next to her. “It is not easy, especially at the start. But now, let’s skip to the next step: celestial navigation. I guess you’ve never used a sextant?”

Emma shook her head. “I had never seen a real one.”

“Let me show you. With this device you can measure what we call sights. A sight is the angle between the horizon and a star, or any other celestial body. Once you have the sights, with a map and some charts, you can calculate our position, but that’s the next step, I’ll show you this later. For now, take this, by the handle, here,” he said, handing her the sextant. “Is it clear for now?”

“Yes. But how do you use it?”

“I’m coming to it. Can you see the telescope here? It will show you two images. When you take a sight, you have to point the sextant to the horizon. We’re lucky. Tonight, the night is clear and the moon is almost full, the horizon is easy to see. Once you see the horizon through the telescope, you have to find your star. This,” he said, pointing the lower part of the sextant, “is the clamp. By moving it along the arc, you change the orientation of this mirror. The light of the star will reflect into this first mirror, then into this one, and into the telescope. You’ll see both images, the horizon and the star. When the star is brought down to the horizon, you can release the clamp, and read the angle on the arc.”

Emma looked from the sextant to Killian. “I’m not sure I understand.”

Finding her expression especially irresistible at this moment, he tossed an arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer to press a kiss on her cheek. “It’ll be easier to understand when you do it. First, you need to find your star. Pick a bright one.”

Emma looked up again and pointed the brightest star she had spotted. Realizing her finger was probably not showing the same star from where he was, she understood why he was so close to her when pointing stars. Leaning against him, she pointed the star again. “This one.”

“Nice choice. Any idea what this star could be?”

She remembered the name of a bright star and gave it a try. “The North star?”

Killian smiled brightly. “See? You can recognize some of them.”

“It was one of the only names I remembered.”

“You were still right. Don’t try to make me believe otherwise, it won’t work.” Softly, he brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Now you can take a sight. Hold the sextant and look into the telescope. You have to see the horizon.”

Emma did what she was asked. It didn’t take her long. “I can see it, what do I do now?”

“Now…” Killian took her free hand and placed it on the clamp, moving it along the arc. “Can you see how the image changes?”

“Yes.”

“You have to find your star and get it aligned with the horizon.”

Still looking into the telescope, Emma kept moving the clamp.

“I can’t find it. There are so many stars. I think I’m lost, I don’t know where the North star is.”

Killian looked at the sky and studied the position of the mirrors, and of the sextant itself.

“Perhaps you should turn your head on the right. Nope, you moved too much.” Softly cupping her chin, he oriented her in what he was thinking was the right way, before reaching for her hand again, changing the orientation of the mirror. “Like this, I think you should be close.”

Carefully moving the clamp, Emma kept looking for the North star. Finally, she saw it. “I’ve found it! And it’s aligned with the horizon.”

“Well done, love. Now, you can let go of the clamp and read the angle on the arc.”

Again, she followed his instructions, before looking up at him once she had the sight. “How can we know I haven’t made a mistake?”

“I will check.”

Taking the sextant, he spent only a few seconds looking into the telescope before reading the angle.

“You’ve been so fast.”

“Love, it was your first try, I’ve been sailing for years. And look at this.”

Emma glanced at the sextant he was showing her: it was indicating the same angle. She looked up at him and saw the proud smile on his lips.

“You did it, you took a sight like a real sailor. Now, come with me.”

Killian brought her to the bow of the ship.

“What are we doing here?”

“Collecting the last piece of information that we need to know where the ship is going.”

Leaning back against him as soon as he wrapped his arms around her, she let out a soft sigh of delight.

“What do we need to know?”

Killian pressed his cheek against hers. “We need to know where we’re going. Look at the horizon ahead, and look up at the sky.”

“How is that going to help?” she asked, doing as she was told.

“Right above the bow, there is a star aligned with two other bright stars which are more on the left. Can you see them?”

“Yes.”

“They are part of the Aquila constellation. All we need to remember is that we’re heading towards this star.”

“I still don’t understand why we need it.”

He kissed her cheek before turning her in his arms. “We can find this star on a sky map. Once we have the position of the ship, it’ll allow us to check our trajectory.”

“Oh now I understand. But can’t we use a compass for this?”

“We could, that’s another way of doing it. Now, we have all we need to use the maps.”

Once back in the quarters, Emma listened carefully as he explained her how to use charts and maps to calculate the position of the ship from the sight they had taken. She was looking up at him from time to time, loving how passionate he seemed to be as he was sharing his knowledge with her. She listened carefully, but she didn’t think she could do all of it on her own.

“… which means that we’re here.” He took her hand and placed her finger on the map, in the middle of the ocean. “And we’re heading to this direction.”

Following his lead, her finger trailed across the map. It stopped when they reached land.

“The Enchanted Forest,” she read.

“Aye, the Enchanted Forest. We’re on our right path, everything is fine. And, even if I know it’ll require time for you to master it, you now know how to navigate under the stars. Soon, you’ll be a real pirate princess.”

Emma couldn’t repress a smile. “You really want me to be your princess, don’t you?”

“Perhaps I do,” he said, smiling back.

Maybe it was the tenderness in his eyes when he was looking at her which reminded her how much she loved him, or maybe it was just him and everything he was and he had done for her. Biting the inside of her lip, her hand reached for her scrunchie as soon as he looked away to focus on the maps that he rolled up. She removed it and lightly shook her head to let her hair down. Still lightly biting the inside of her lip, not taking her eyes off of him, she was working on her belt when he focused on her again. He noticed her hands on her belt, and how she was staring at him.

“What is it, love?”

She finished to remove her belt and cupped his cheeks, looking into his eyes. There was no need for words: his gaze was so intense that she knew he knew. The intensity was the same as when she had been lying on deck, looking up at him; there had been in his eyes something more than usual, something she had not been able to identify at the time. She was only now realizing what it had been, as he was probably seeing the same thing in her eyes, this same desire she wasn’t willing to fight anymore. She looked down and unbuttoned the buttons of her blue vest before letting it slip off of her shoulders, feeling his eyes on her. She was starting to untie the lace of her shirt when his fingers reached for hers, taking care of doing it himself. Instead, she focused on his own clothes and took care of making him shirtless. A shiver ran through her body as she felt the cool metal of his hook grazing over her skin, which he was using to untie the lace of her shirt.

They were both wearing only underwear when they made eye contact again. The infinite amount of tenderness and love she could see in his eyes made her melt. Killian played with her blonde curls before brushing her hair over her shoulder. He cupped her jaw and pulled her against him to kiss her. All the tenderness and love she had seen in his eyes could also been felt in this kiss. Emma felt like she was burning inside. She tightly wrapped her arms around his neck, unwilling to ever let him go. She felt his hand slowly trailing down her waist, her hip, her thigh. Killian pulled her leg up to his waist and, giving a small impulse, she wrapped her second leg around his waist, letting him carry her to the bed where he sat down. Placing her hands on his chest, she gently pushed him to make him lie down and ran her hands down his torso, admiring his body while he was doing the same, softly trailing his fingers and hook down her sides. She looked him in the eyes and, not understanding how his gaze could be even more intense than before, gave him a smile before leaning down to kiss him. His arms slipped in her back while her fingers went through his hair, her other hand wandering around any accessible part of his body. He sat up again, rather tightly holding her against him. Left breathless by this most passionate kiss, she melted in his embrace when he trailed kisses down her neck. His lips kept trailing down and she let go of him just the time to remove her bra, feeling his eyes on her as she did so. She went back to kissing him. With an arm in her lower back and his fingers trailing down her body, he turned over to lay her down.

* * *

 

The next morning, when Emma woke up, she didn’t need to open her eyes to know where she was, and a smile tugged at her lips as she thought of the past night. He was on his back and she was lying against him, partly over him, her cheek resting over his chest. His arm was in her back, with his fingertips grazing over her waist. One of her hands was on his shoulder, the other one was resting over his heart, one of her leg was between his. She was unwilling to move. He was not moving either, she could feel his chest moving regularly under her as he was breathing steadily. Emma thought he was probably still asleep.

Finally opening her eyes, she looked at her hand and softly moved her fingers, playing with his chest hair. His breathing was still steady and she decided it was the occasion to take some more time exploring his flawless body. Her fingers trailed up to his neck, along his collar bone, and she reached for his arm, her fingertips following the lines of his muscles. After a moment, he caressed her side and she looked up. He was awake, as devilishly handsome as ever, his hair messy because of her fingers threading through the raven strands during the night. His eyes were locked on her, and something in his expression made her think she may have been mistaken in thinking he was asleep all this time.

“How long have you been awake?” she asked.

A smirk made its way to his features. “For a while.”

“And you said nothing?”

Her question made him chuckle.

“I didn’t want to wake you up. I’d say watching you sleep is one of my favorite things to do, especially when you’re against me like this. And then… you can’t imagine how enjoyable it is to feel your fingers trailing over me like this.” As she was staring at him, realizing he had awaken before her, he raised a teasing eyebrow. “You’re not the only one able to pretend you’re still asleep.”

Her smile brightened as she remembered being the one pretending to be asleep the previous morning, just like he had just done. She rested her head on his chest and started following the lines of his muscles again, thinking it was probably not as enjoyable as his own fingers now trailing over her back. She let out a contented sigh. Her hand closed on his biceps and she pulled herself on top of him. She softly kissed his lips before leaning her forehead against his, her fingers caressing his cheek. He didn’t stop caressing her back and she propped up her head in her hand, looking him in the eyes and letting herself get lost into the love and tenderness she could see there.

“What have I ever done to deserve you?” he asked.

She smiled and trailed her fingers down his neck. “My devilishly handsome captain, do you really expect me to give you all the reasons? Because the list might be long. The tenderness in your eyes whenever you look at me, the way you smile whenever you see me, the softness of your touch; how could I possibly resist all of this? From the first day when we met, you’ve selflessly put me first, doing everything in your power to help me. You made me feel like I could be loved, and showed me I was wrong all these times I was thinking I could never love someone the way I love you. With everything that you are and everything that you’ve done, you won my heart.”

Killian was devouring her with his eyes. He pulled her down to him and whispered in her ear. “I can tell you did the same to me. My heart is yours. I love you.”

Melting in his embrace, she didn’t even try to move. She stayed there, enjoying his caresses while it lasted; she knew duty might call anytime. And she was right.

“My love, I have to go back on deck.”

“I know,” she sighed.

But she didn’t move. He chuckled and rolled her under him. His hand in hers, pinned on the mattress, he smirked.

“I am as unwilling as you to leave this bed, but I have to.”

He leant over her to kiss her cheek before trailing kisses along her jaw and down her neck. When his open mouth reached her breast, she had to bite her lip to prevent any sound from escaping her. Then leaning his ear over her heart, he listened to her heart rate go down. Looking down at him, Emma didn’t remind him he was supposed to go back on deck. Without warning, Killian trailed his hook down her side and stopped on her hip. A smile lightened up his face as her heart rate increased.

“This has to be my favorite sound in the world. Or let’s say the second favorite; nothing will ever sound as beautiful as your laugh.”

“Killian…”

She had nothing to say but his name had escaped her as he was making her swoon. She let out a sigh of delight. Her hand disappeared in his hair while she wrapped her arm around his shoulders, holding him close to her and losing herself in her thoughts. He still had his ear pressed over her heart when she remembered he was supposed to go back on deck.

“Don’t think I don’t want to keep you here, but I wouldn’t want to get you into trouble: I thought you had to go, captain?” she said teasingly.

He lifted up his head to look at her, a smirk on his lips. “If this night was your way to get me into trouble, I’m afraid I will go with bad form and get into trouble again.”

Resisting the temptation to pull him back down to her, she giggled. “Alright captain, time to go back on deck.”

Killian kissed her, his teeth lightly tugging at her bottom lip, and got up. Lying on her side, her head propped up in her hand, she watched him getting dressed.

“I see you, not taking your eyes off of me,” he said, flashing her a teasing smile.

“You would despair if I did. And why would I deprive myself of such a view?”

He chuckled and, now dressed, came back to her. With another kiss, he took her breath away before departing.

* * *

 

Emma came out of the quarters to go out on deck. She quickly spotted him, holding the wheel. After this night when he had broken down what was remaining of her walls, she was finally feeling like talking about everything she had been willing to tell him. As usual, he flashed her a bright smile when he saw her, and she smiled back. Wondering where she could start, she walked to him and caressed his arm, reaching for his hand which she removed from the wheel, so that she could step between him and the wheel. His eyes were locked on hers. It was like he knew she wanted to tell him something, as he waited for her to talk.

“Do you remember how I asked you to bring me home, when I first met you?”

“How could I forget how we first met?”

“I asked you this because of the prophecy.”

“The prophecy saying I was the one supposed to bring you back to Boston.” He looked away, focusing on the horizon ahead of them instead. Emma knew him well enough to guess what he was thinking.

“You think you have failed, but you haven’t,” she said.

The words were enough for him to lock his eyes back on hers.

“Killian, the prophecy wasn’t about you bringing me back to Boston, it was about you giving me what I was looking for. I was the one thinking it was about you helping me find a way back to Boston, but I was mistaken. I’m not looking for a way back to Boston. I’m just looking for home.” He seemed confused. Taking a deep breath, she tried to explain how she was feeling. “I’ve been told something a long time ago, Killian. Home is the place when you leave, you just miss it. Since the day when I met you, I’ve never missed Boston.”

His eyes seemed to light up.

“Are you saying you don’t want to go back to your realm?” he asked, unable to repress a smile.

“I am saying I want to be where it feels like home. Boston is not… I don’t miss it. I was alone: no family, no one to love. There’s nothing waiting for me there. I know you know what it feels like. On one of the first days when I was here, Liam told me about how you also lost your parents. You and I, we understand each other.”

“To the only difference I had my brother. You had no one. You are much stronger than I was. Do you have any idea how much I admire you for this, and for everything that you are?”

His voice was full of tenderness. He caressed her cheek. Drowning in his eyes, she leant into his hand. She bit the inside of her lip as she tried to keep the thread of what she was saying.

“Have I ever told you I made a wish right before the book who took me there appeared to me?” she asked, and he shook his head. “This wish I made, it was not to be alone anymore.”

Once again, she almost got lost into his eyes. Since he didn’t say anything, looking like he had lost himself as well, she went on.

“Killian, I made this wish, and it became true: a few hours later, I was running into you. And now… why would I go back to Boston when, here, I have you? I can’t imagine life without you.”

A bright smile was on his lips now, and his eyes were sparkling with hope; the hope he wouldn’t need to let her go. “I was wondering if you would ever feel like this, like the way I do.”

“I think I’ve known for quite a while now. When I was locked up in that tower, the first time she took me away from you, I wasn’t missing Boston, or this ship. I was missing you.” Trying her best not to let his intense gaze distract her from what she was saying, she took a breath before going on. “Home is not a place, it is where you are. I am not interested in living in a realm where you’re not. Killian, I want to stay with you. Don’t let me be a shooting star when I can be a satellite staying in orbit.”

“This is all I’ve ever wanted to hear.”

Emma didn’t remember ever seeing so much happiness on his features. He brushed her chin with his thumb and pinned her against the wheel to give her one of these breathtaking kisses. Caressing her cheek with the back of his finger, he gazed into her eyes.

“I’ve loved you since the first moment I saw you, and I’ll love you until my last,” he said.

Killian pulled her into his embrace, tightly holding her in his arms, and she smiled.

“This is where I’m home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story continues! The second part of the Bring Me Home series, I See the Light, can be found in my works!


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